


Fade Dancer

by Awakened_Dreamer



Category: Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angry Rants, Disturbing Themes, Emotional Build Up, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Following my own minds Can-non, My mind is to tiny to be on it's own, Wrote this because what if?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-29
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2018-04-11 23:37:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 34
Words: 64,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4456886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Awakened_Dreamer/pseuds/Awakened_Dreamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So what if Compassion isn't the only spirit that decides to leave the Fade? How would things work out. Work in progress and it's my first one. </p><p>I'm not following the path of the game so much as the things that take place in Skyhold itself. I'm starting the story in Dragon Age 2. Not 100% sure where this tale is pulling me I work when my Muse cracks the whip and she is a cranky witch. </p><p>Warning in Advance some Chapters are a lot smaller then others. </p><p>Feedback is welcomed and I hope I do half as well as some of the amazing writer's on this site.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Art Forms

**Author's Note:**

> This is purely from my perspective and in no way aligns completely with the games. This story ran amuck in my head so I wrote it.

Chapter 1:

  


He hummed softly under his breath as his hands moved deftly and sure, the needle and thread wove in and out gently pulling the edges together to softly align. He would stop often and smooth the material with gentle fingertips and a lightly dampened piece of fine cotton. He murmured with reverence as he worked coaxing the delicate material as if coaxing a small child to take their first hesitant steps. Several pairs of eyes watched as he nimbly sewed the pieces together only to stop and frown softly.

  


“No, this is wrong I do not like it.” his lips pursed with annoyance as he looked around his work room.

  


He stepped away from the table he worked at to go to another, a smile almost graced his lips as he ran his fingertips over a different canvas. Cocking his head to one side he glanced at the creamy tones and the fine texture. Looking back at the table he had vacated he did smile.

  


“Yes, yes now this is a perfect fit.” He looked at someone in the shadows of the room. “I’ll need the other piece that matches this one here go fetch it for me.” the shadow bowed slightly and slipped from the room like a ghost.

  


Glancing back forth between the table which he stood beside and the one he had been working at he came to a decision quickly. Lifting a small bladed knife with the sharpest edge gold could buy, he went to work cutting along pre-drawn lines and gently lifting and peeling he smiled and sang an old Ferelden love song under his breath. Once done he held the new piece in front of his grey eyes a satisfied smile curled his mouth. He gently cleaned it with loving tenderness like a man caressing the woman he loved.

  


By the time he placed the new piece onto the work table the shadow had reappeared carrying a heavy burden. The shadow stood patiently waiting for the Master to acknowledge. He turned once he was done and looked at the burden in the shadows arms, a soft frown marred his features as he walked quickly around the tables. He motioned to an empty one and the shadow placed its burden down, slipping back out of the way.

  


The man’s hands unwrapped the newest canvas and sucked in a startled breath. Trembling hands fingered the gentle silk, shifting and lifting, tracing the textures and lines. But what captured his entire focus was the heavy flame colored silk at the crown of the canvas, his hands delved deep into the fire of silk and lifted it to his nose inhaling deeply it smelled of wild heather and sunshine it smelt like heaven.

  


His eyes lifted as his fingers spasmed around the silk, he pinned the shadow with a glare “This is not the same as the other canvas! This one is better more what I wanted”

  


The shadow bowed it’s head “I am sorry Master, the second canvas has left the city and I did not think you wished to wait since you're so close to completion.”

  


“Hmmm I’ll forgive you this once. For this canvas is far more superior than the one before…” his words faded off as he gave the canvas his full attention.

  


Softly his hands reached to lightly roll the silk back he let out a disgusted growl. “Figures there would be a damn flaw, nothing is ever perfect.”

  


Sighing softly the man went and retrieved his tools, lifting the silk he gazed down into green orbs only just starting to get a cloudy film over them. Lifting his head he looked at the shadow and smiled “Now my friend go retrieve me orbs the color of Trevinter chocolate. Not to dark and not to light they have to be just perfect.”

  


The shadow dipped it’s head and turn to slip away wondering what in the bloody fade was the color of chocolate. The shadow stifled a sigh, the Master wanted perfection and if he did not get it then there would be hell to pay.

  


The man paid no attention to the departing rogue, his hands tenderly caressed the face of the young woman on the table. One fingertip traced her full pink lips still open from her death sigh, perfect he thought. He gaze slide down to her body and he frowned again she had a voluptuous figure and that would just not do. Hips to wide and breasts far too large and heavy. Tapping one finger against his chin, thoughtfully he glanced at the other table it held the perfect body long slender dancers legs, small but perfectly rounded breasts, a torso not to long and not to short. With a smile and lifted his favorite knife, would just be simpler to place the perfect head on the perfect body.

  


Kirkwall hustled and bustled above the chambers in which he worked, he had no care for the outside world or its people. His world revolved around the here and now, he had desires that needed to be acted upon. He worked quickly and smoothly removing the offending head from the lovely body laying on the table and replacing it with the new head. As he worked a whispery voice echoed in his ear it spoke of desires, lust, dreams, fantasies the litany was so compelling at times he had to stop his work because his hands trembled and shook too much he was afraid of ruining his canvas.

  


Days later the man stood and looked upon his beautiful creation, she lay as if sleeping on the bed, her long dancers legs elegant and poetic in their beauty. Long hip length hair cascaded down from her crown the depth of color made his heart hurt with its rich flame reds and even deeper blood tones. The warm brown eyes gazed back at him and he shed a silent tear at her perfection. The deep blue of the gown he had tailor made for her was set off by the silver lace and edgings which complimented her soft creamy skin tone. His knuckles gently caressed one delicate cheek as he moved to pose her upon a four poster bed bedecked in silk.

  


He had drained himself merging the magic that went into smoothing scars from her stitches, to keep that horrid film from clouding her beautiful velvet brown eyes, to keeping the luster of her fiery hair, the dewiness of her satin skin. He even went so far as to completely enchant the bed upon which she rested so daintily. Yes she was perfection and he was her Master, he owned her completely inside and out all that was left was to replace the beautiful shell with the soul of his beloved. He desired the woman that he had loved beyond all others, he dreamed of her when he would actually sleep, her name a prayer on his lips and now he had her.

  
  


The shadow stood off to the side silent as the darkness that harbored him watching the Master’s hands pose his creation so that she lay amongst the silk and satin like a sleeping dream awaiting to awaken. He often wondered why the Master made one so young and beautiful when he himself was an old man, but he was simply a minion meant to obey not to point out flaws in the Master’s sometimes erratic plans.

  



	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've erased this summary 5 times now, so I can honestly say summaries are not going to be my strong suit. But this will tie in with the first chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually built the story around the actions in the first and second chapters. I'm not sure what that says about my mind set.
> 
> After rereading this chapter several times I realized just how many times I reused certain words I apologize for how bad this chapter turned out and will work on trying to re-proof it soon!! 
> 
> Thanks for your patience!

Chapter 2:

The soft red wisp drifted along no worries or cares just simply existing when not needed. Sometimes it would drift by a pair of lovers and whisper softly into welcoming ears to start passion’s fire deep in their hearts. Sometimes the little wisp would dance along on gentle breezes fluttering and sparkling like a tiny reddish pink snowflake, as capricious and whimsical as a dream. But suddenly a yearning burned deep in the snowflakes being a need or desire to see more then the Fade.

The wisp had been lurking around a young human girl’s dreams a lot lately just watching as her dreams filled with yearning for a young guardsman she desired. The dreams were so passionate and yearning that the tiny spirit couldn’t move past this girls dream of romance and first kisses, of desires to touch and be touched by him, yearnings of his head to turn and his eyes finding hers with a tender smile curling his lips. The wisp had never before stayed so long on one person's Fade dream but the curiosity that it built up in the wisp kept the tiny spirit from moving on. 

The little wisp was dancing around playing with the flames of the candle the girl had lit in her room. It never had a thought about the shadowy figure the slipped in through the balcony window, it was simply waiting for the girl to sink deeper into the Fade so it could follow her dreams and learn from them. It stunned the little wisp when just as it started to slip back into the Fade to touch the girl's mind when everything was sundered and it was forcibly rejected back out into the mortal world, the pain was like nothing the little wisp had ever felt before and it was stunned by the actual feeling of pain. But as the wisp floated and danced about the flickering candle it watched the shadow man lift the now dead girl, whom he’d rolled in a thick blanket and carry her silently into the night. Bemused and even annoyed by this interruption the tiny wisp followed along behind them. 

The wisp felt the corruption of the desire demon long before it saw the thing. The she demon was whispering in an old man’s ear with the voice of a long lost lover. Luckily for the wisp the demon was so focused on the old man it paid no attention to the tiny spirit. But the wisp could feel the man’s desires and passions roll off him like the waves rolling onto the sand from the ocean. It perfumed the air in the room he worked in, almost so thick it clouded it. The demon wanted a body, any body but this demon wasn’t just desire it was vain as well and it wanted a perfect beautiful body to possess, the wisp hid, watching, wondering why the demon didn’t seek a living host, for a dead body wouldn’t last long under the dirge and corruption of a demon.

Growing slightly bored with all the surgical business going on the wisp slipped back into the Fade to play and roam with other gentle spirits. Rumors were abounding in the depths of the Fade that several spirits had left and went to the mortal side to live. Some flourished and some were corrupted which lead to them being destroyed. But hearing about Justice being able to walk among the mortals piqued the spirits curiosity. The spirit wondered what it would be like to walk among the mortals, to dance, laugh, love, flirt. 

The idea was so tempting that the tiny wisp darted back to the old man’s home to see how his passionate endeavor was going. As the spirit fluttered and twirled around the building erupted into chaos. Demons of all kinds fought against a human woman and her companions. Screams of mortals and demons alike echoed off the rock walls with a violent passion that made the tiny wisp shudder inside with hunger. That brought the tiny spirit up short to hide behind a thick tapestry hanging broken on one wall. Winking softly the tiny creature wondered if this was what desire truly was, the burning need to be more than what it currently was. 

The fight was long, bloody and brutal the old man finally succumbed to his wounds but only after his puppets died. Three desire demons had used animated broken bodies to try and protect him but in the end their power was no match for the passionate hatred of the woman they faced. Her companions held her as she cried over what was left of her mother's broken body. The tiny spirit hurt along side as it watched the older woman’s soul finally seek release her desire to see her daughter’s face one last time was the only thing that had anchored her to this world. It fluttered softly waiting to see if they would find the hidden room with the last remaining body, but they didn’t the pain and horror of what they had seen, what they had fought was to much and they left hurriedly trying to out race the madness of Quentin’s twisted passion.

The spirit hovered over the remaining body colors flickering between deepest red to the palest pink as the tiny being contemplated what it was about to try and do. Finally it dawned on the tiny creature that the magic which held this body in its suspended state was waning quickly, with the old man dead the magic would fade away and this body would decay and wither. The lure of being more than a tiny fragment in the Fade proved to be too much for the spirit, with one last wink of light the tiny being plunged into the magic holding the body open for possession. 

It hurt like nothing the spirit had ever felt before, ripping burning pain tore through the spirit’s being forcing its tiny form to fill a much larger vacant hole. It’s entire being was stretched beyond anything the creature had ever seen inside the corridors of the Fade. The spirit screamed in agony as the pain crashed down like a suffocating wave that never seemed to end. With a lung burning gasp she sat up on the bed, hands frantically clawing at the comforter she had been laying on as wide eyes darted around like frantic birds caught in high winds. Her whole body shuddered as the spirit and the soulless body became one being with one mind and one pulse. Brown eye’s rolled back in her head as she slumped back in a faint, but her new chest gently rose and fell under the blue brocade of the dress.

Hours later maybe days she didn’t know, the spirit now a woman sat on the edge of the bed lifting her hands before her face one at a time admiring the long elegant fingers, the delicate wrist, the feeling of blood moving under silky skin. She kept laying one hand on her chest feeling the heartbeat under her fingertips. A smile curled pink lips so much that it hurt which in turn caused her to laugh with throaty abandon. It took a little while to learn how to walk and not fall flat on her ass, because that hurt in a painful way. 

When she finally got her balance and managed to wobble over before the wood and glass vanity she gazed in utter amazement at the reflection. Her brown eyes sparkled in a heart shaped face, pink lips curled softly at the corners even when she wasn’t smiling. Her eyes drifted down to study the tiny silvery line around her neck, it bothered her to see the proof of her body’s actual birth. Looking through the various boxes on the tabletop she found a lovely deep blue ribbon that held a silver pendent on it, her finger’s took time learning how to attach it but once it settled along her lower neck it hide the tiny scar. With a sigh she sat herself in the chair gazing into the mirror and wondering suddenly where was she supposed to go from here?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First Meeting between the two spirits. Just remember please that this POV is from the second spirits view. I wont be covering much of the actual game. 
> 
> Feedback is welcomed and Thank You for reading.

Chapter 3:

Brown eyes followed the lines of sparkling white snow up to the lofty heights of Skyhold’s battlements, it was an impressive structure of stone built onto stone. The snow sparkled like diamonds in the daylight so much so that it hurt to look at it for too long. The chill in the air kept her huddled under the heavy fur lined robes covering her from head to toe. It had taken her a long time to save up enough to travel to the Inquisition’s mighty fortress, but she had high hopes it would be well worth it. 

She gently gnawed on her lower lip as she smiled, her stomach was fluttering like a riot of angry butterflies. Her dream was finally close enough to almost touch, she felt as giddy as a young girl going through the throes of first love. One hand raised to stifle the laugh trying to creep out. The only thing out shining the happiness of finally being here was the heavy dense cold that was making it’s way through the layers of clothes she wore.

Hours later and she was finally settled into her room before a blazing fire with a hot cup of tea to warm her hands. The snow and ice were beautiful but she held a deep love for all things hot and fiery. Some people said it matched her personality and passions. But it also matched her abilities to control said fire, it was in her nature to love fire and heat. She was a passionate creature and she adored the flush of heat that warmed her skin when her nature peeked through.

She hoped that the rumors she’d heard about involving a fellow spirit in the Inquisition forces was true. She’d used her letter of recommendation from Varric and all the money she had saved up over the years to get here from Kirkwall. If this was a dead end, well she would be staying here for a very long time. Supposedly there was also a dwarf fitting Varric’s description running with the Inquisition, she really hoped it was it would be nice if there was a familiar friendly face around this cold fortress.

She cocked her flame colored head gently wondering what was taking so long, she wasn’t hiding herself or what she was. She had been hoping the uniqueness of her being here would have gotten the Spirit of Compassion’s attention by now. Sighing softly she went back to sipping her tea. That’s when she felt the ripple in the air, coupled with the shadows condensing. A soft smile curved her lips slowly as she sat the cup down on the small table before standing to face the shadow invading her room.

“Well it certainly took you long enough…” her impish smile slipped as she turned to face a dagger’s tip against her throat that halted her movements swiftly.

“Why.. Why are you here?” the voice was soft and lethal. 

Brown eyes tried to search through scruffy white blonde locks to the eye’s beneath “Co..compassion?… Hi.. Um” her voice faltered.

The dagger shifted away from her throat as his head cocked studying her from beneath the big floppy hat he wore. “Warmth, heat, fire.. Laughter.. Tears.. I know you.. I think.”

Her smile lit up her face making her eyes dance “YES.. I mean yes… You know me.” 

His head tilted down letting his hat and hair hide his eyes again “How?”

Now becoming unsettled by his chilly reception her hands nervously played with a lock of red hair, she nodded to the chairs before the fire, with a timid smile “Please sit with me… it’s a long story.. “

She could feel his unease it danced over her skin like a soft breeze, sighing softly she moved to sit in one chair leaving the other opened for him to claim. One brow arched slowly as she watched his lanky form move to stand by the fireplace his gaze captured by something deep in the heart of the flames. Her gaze drifted over him slowly, she had wondered what his human body would look like. Long legs clad in dark leather, smooth lines, all of him was smooth deadly lines that spoke of stealth and quiet deadliness. 

She felt her stomach pitch, to finally see another like her in the flesh, it was an amazing feeling and he was adorable that didn't hurt either. She shook her head slowly the cold in this place must be affecting her more than she thought. Her gaze lingered on the floppy hat and the tendrils of white blonde hair the danced along his collar and cheeks, in her eyes he was quite simply beautiful. 

“I’m not beautiful.. I’m a spirit…” his voice was tinged with confusion as he cast her a puzzled look.

She blinked and then laughed warmly “Sorry dearest.. My mind wandered away with me.. But you are truly beautiful Compassion.”

He turned slowly leaning back against the mantle of the fireplace and folding his arms across his chest. “Your story?”

She told him and it took hours for her to tell him her story, he silently listened only interrupting with the occasional question. It took quite awhile for her to explain everything she had been doing since she took over a pieced together body. At one point during her tale she could feel the suspicion rolling of him so she stood and walked close to him reaching up she unclasped the velvet choker from around her neck letting it fall into one hand as she tilted her head letting the lights dance over the silvery line along her throat. She lifted the heavy fall of hair and turned so he could see the line went all the way around. His fingertips hesitantly reached out to touch the line, his silver blue eyes locked with her brown ones, she could see the sadness in their depths. She smiled softly and assured him it did not hurt then or now but it did remind her that the life she had now was precious to her.

“but why are you here Passion? In Skyhold?” he pulled his fingers away from the scar on her throat. 

“Why are you here Compassion?.. And my human name is Sondra” she smiled at him. 

He looked at her tilting his head with a bemused look on his face “I’m here to help.. It’s what I do.. Cole is what I’m called now.”

Laying a gentle hand to his cheek she nodded “I’m here to help as well dearest..”

He locked his fingers around her delicate wrist as his silver blue eyes pierced her “Truthfully? You’re here to help?”

Now it was her turn to be confused “Yes, why would you ask me that?”

He shifted his stance taking his full height which forced her to look up to him, the look on his angular face spoke volumes “Because not all spirits are helpful.. And these people are my family…..” 

Her throat convulsed as a shiver of fear, she was no fool. What he hadn’t said was that he could and would kill to protect them, even if it meant killing a fellow spirit. He felt about these people like she herself felt about the family she'd made back in Kirkwall.

“Alright Cole.. I understand.. I came here because you’re here and I thought … I was.. Am ..” she dropped her head sighing she was lonely dammit, and only another spirit could even understand that.

His free hand moved to lift her face up, his eyes searched hers deeply before he gave the barest of nods “I believe you.. And I’m sorry you're lonely.. I can help..”

Her smile came from the depth of her soul her voice dropped to a whisper “You already have.”

Once he relaxed a little they sat and talked about what they used to be and what they had become. She told him how she’d learned to survive on her wits and desire to be free. He spoke of the things he’d done in the White Spire, her depth of understanding helped make it easier for him to talk and his sweet gentle patience allowed her natural vibrancy to shine through. He didn’t laugh or make unnecessary motions while her hands fluttered and moved when she spoke. He was the ice to her fire and they talked deep into the night.

The sun’s first rays where breaking across the sky when he finally moved to leave, she stood as he did. For the first time in a very long while she felt accepted and home. Her breath caught in her throat when it hit her that she finally felt safe, her blood hummed in her veins with the intoxicating rush of it. She was humming under her breath when Cole simply vanished from sight, twirling she threw herself across the big bed they’d given her. She had her own bedroom, she spread her arms out and smiled as she sank into the softness of the thick blankets. 

From the shadows outside her balcony windows silver blue eyes watched her. He wanted to trust her but he just wasn’t sure if he should. He was confused by the appearance of another spirit in a human body. He felt her warmth and passion but it was so very different from his own need to help. He sighed silently wondering if he should go speak with someone about this but he was conflicted about what would happen if he told them another spirit was inside the walls of Skyhold. In the end he decided to wait and watch before making any choices.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally everyone's Favorite Dwarf!!! Not a super long chapter but it helps show off Sondra's playful nature.
> 
> Enjoy!!

Chapter 4:

Two days after her arrival Sondra was crawling the walls. Cole had left with the Inquisitor to travel so she had no one to speak to. Not being an idle woman she decided to take matters into her own hands and went in search of Lady Josephine. She walked the halls and pathways of the main building letting one hand gently caress the walls just to feel the solidness of it. Her long sweeping gown swished around her legs and sent puffs of dust up from the floor as she moved. It didn’t really take her to long to find Lady Josephine, with a welcoming smile the lady motioned to a chair across from where she sat behind her big desk.

“Lady Sondra what a pleasure. Is there something I can help you with?” Josephine’s dark eyes warmed as she smiled.

Returning the smile Sondra sat gracefully “Yes actually there is. You know I’m an entertainer and well not to sound ungrateful, but I’m fairly going insane with nothing to do”

One dark brow arched slowly “Oh. Well what would you like… to do .. Ummm”

Sondra laughed warmly and a devilish smile curling her lips “Well by any chance is there a stage in the Herald’s Rest? I can sing and dance”

Josie thoughtfully tapped the feather quill that seemed to forever be in her hand against her lips “Hmmm let me look into that for you. If not I can see about having one built fairly quickly we have some very talented wood builders here.”

Sondra nodded gracefully her bright smile almost dazzling the Ambassador “I would be ever indebted to you, My Lady”

Josie’s cheeks tinted a soft pink under her dark complexion as she hurriedly scribbled something down on parchment “Of course I’m so sorry I did not think of this sooner.. Also is your room satisfactory?”

“It's amazing thank you so very much for allowing me to have my privacy” Sondra’s voice almost purred with happiness.

Josie smiled warmly as she wrote her dark head nodding “My pleasure Lady Sondra, is there anything else I can do for you?”

“No My Lady I do thank you for allowing to take some of your precious time. I know you must have a million things to do besides pandering to my needs.” Sondra’s tone dipped into tones of warm honey.

The flush on Josephine’s cheeks deepened at the tone and implication in the wording “Uhhh no problem.. My lady…” 

Sondra rose and smiled waving her hand at the Ambassador before she left the office, humming softly under her breath she made her way to the main hallway almost colliding with a smaller man who was heading to the Ambassador’s office as she left. Offering a soft sheepish smile to the elven man she placed a hand on his shoulder. He glanced up at her offering a perplexed look and dismissive nod before he passed her and went inside. Sondra froze as her heart slammed into her ribs painfully, she’d not brushed up against that kind of power since she was still a small wisp dancing around in the Fade. She swiftly made a mental note to stay far, far away from him.

Giving herself a mental shake she headed for the front doors of the great hall her greatest desire right now was to get out and explore and enjoy something besides four walls. Not that her room wasn’t beautiful and welcoming but because she was bored and needed to do something, anything besides sit and drink tea.

“Hey where you off to in such a rush Flame?” the deep voice halted her in her tracks.

She spun letting out a very unladylike squeal as she jerked up her skirts to rushed over and hug the dwarven man standing by the great hall’s fireplace “VARRIC!!!!!”

Varric laughed deeply as the beautiful redhead rushed into his arms like some smutty scene he’d need to write into one of his novels later “Hello Beautiful. When did you get here?”

Her face glowed as she smiled at Varric and on impulse she leaned in and kissed his cheek “I only just got here a few days ago. I didn’t know you were actually here, I’d heard rumors! but I am so glad you are”

Varric ushered her to a chair as he claimed one for himself “Well had I known I would have come right away to visit you. Last time I saw you young lady you were still dancing and singing at a tavern in Kirkwall that wasn’t the Hangman”

Her laughter danced around them like the tinkling of chimes on a frosty morning turning several heads that hadn’t turned with her outrageous squeal.

“Yes well it got boring there after you and the other's left. Without you guys there and only Aveline and Donnic keeping me somewhat safe in between patrols I decided it might be in my best interest to move on” she grinned wickedly “Besides I missed my favorite dwarf in the whole wide world of Ferelden”

Varric barked out laughter “You girl are the only one who might have ever swayed me from Bianca. But since she’s the jealous type I’d best just stay faithful.”

They sat and caught up for over an hour before Varric asked if she’d like to go to the Herald’s Rest with him. She happily accepted his invitation asking him to give her a moment to go to her room and get her heavy cloak since she was still having trouble with the intense cold. As she walked she smiled to herself, her mind going back to the time oh so long ago when she first saw Varric with Hawke killing Quentin the madman who had created her body. Since she’d become human he had been her best friend and biggest champion never letting anyone hurt her or try and turn her passion for singing and dancing into something perverted and dirty. Many a time he and the ever faithful Bianca had come to her rescue until Hawke finally let it be known that if anyone touched the young dancer they’d never be found again. That all changed after all the insanity that erupted in Kirkwall sending everything into chaos’ eager arms. She was truly happy to find Varric here in Skyhold, she loved the dwarf like he was family.

Walking across from the Great Hall to the Tavern the two of them laughed and joked turning many an eye towards them. Sondra left the hood down on her cloak so her flame red hair stood out against the snowy perfection that dusted the courtyard. Varric true to his nature took great delight in making the girl laugh, it tickled his heart to hear it echo across the vastness of Skyhold. Many people stopped to watch the pair make their way to the tavern and just as many wondered who the redheaded lady was and where she came from.

The interior of the tavern was shadowy and warm which was a welcomed relief to her cold hands. As the pair made their way through a lot of people stopped what they were doing to watch them even the current bard stumbled during her song as they walked by and Sondra graced her with a warm smile. Varric motioned her to a separate room behind the main stairwell. The group sitting back there talking boisterously went silent as Varric walked up with her, she smiled at each of them before one of the men almost fell to the floor pulling out a chair. With a gracious smile to him she sat down, Varric snorted a laugh before taking a chair for himself. Varric quickly introduced her to Bull’s Charger’s, of which currently Iron Bull himself was out with the Inquisitor.

Before long Sondra had the group fairly at ease and laughing again. Her vibrant personality lent itself well within the group. She graciously accepted their teasing when she refused to drink alcohol and only drank hot tea with honey. She instigated a few fun arguments’ between the Charger’s as to who felt they had the best story of the wildest jobs they’d ever taken. It was late when she and Varric decided to finally call it a night. 

Krem leaned over to whisper in Varric’s ear while Sondra put her cloak back on “You know the Chief is going to fall horns over heels for her… it’s the red hair he’s a sap for the redheads.”

Varric turned and his voice took a tone Krem didn’t think he’d ever hear from the fun loving dwarf “I’ll turn him into a pincushion if he lays one finger on that girl.”

Krem leaned back and saw the truth in Varric’s cold eyes, he simply nodded and went back to his ale wishing he had never said a word to the protective dwarf. Mentally he rolled his eyes at his own stupidity he should have known how Varric would be, given the dwarf’s unusual protectiveness over the weird spirit boy Cole. Krem simply sighed and wondered how many hearts besides the Chief’s where going to be broken in the dainty hands of the fire haired lass, quite possibly his own as well.

Sondra leaned down to place a warm kiss on Varric’s cheek “Thank you for being here my dearest friend and thank you for the wonderful company I have missed you and Bianca too!”

Varric smiled warmly patting her cheek like a father would “I’m glad you’re here as well Flame, I got a feeling you're going to melt this cold fortress’ heart”

She laughed softly to herself as she went back to her room. Varric was for her like the father she could never have and her very nature meant she’d set fire to anyone or anything that tried to hurt the wily dwarf. As she shut her door and hung her cloak up to dry her mind wandered off. She’d need to remember to ask Varric what happened to the rest of Hawke’s group. She knew that Isabel had flown the coop, and Ander’s was dead. But what of Merrill the sweet elven mage, or Fenris the broody ex slave whom she‘d been working behind the scene‘s in trying to get him and Hawke hooked up. Avelin she knew was head of the Guards in Kirkwall still. Maybe tomorrow she’d ask him about it, it would be nice to hear about old friends. She worried about Hawke and Fenris, they left quickly under the cover of night.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Simply the Spirit of Passion has a temper tantrum.. Everyone needs a good snit once in awhile..
> 
> Enjoy..

It was weeks later and Sondra was happily checking out her new stage in the Herald’s Rest when the Inquisitor’s group arrived back home. She’d been going over music with the resident Bard Maryden, because at this point Sondra really, really wanted and needed to dance it was driving her nuts to not allow her passionate nature out to play. But hearing the horns being blown and knowing that Cole was finally back brought a bright smile to her face, she missed their talks, even if he didn’t understand everything she talked about. She missed his sweet gentle company, he was a calming influence on her. 

Hours later her warm lovely smile had all but faded from existence as she caught people’s hidden thoughts. Several times it almost made her physically ill to hear the thoughts drifting around her. How did Cole deal with this on a day to day basis? She finally fled to the comforts of her room locking the door behind her and changing into her favorite comfy nightgown and curling up in a chair before the fire. Her mind was lost trying to figure out how to help the Spirit of Compassion and warring with her own passionate nature to rain fury down upon their ignorant heads. 

“I’d prefer that you didn’t rain anything down upon anyone’s head” the soft voice drifted out of the shadows.

She jumped up out of her chair to throw her arms around Cole’s waist hugging him, confusing him in the process.

“But how do you deal with that? Some of the things they think is … are horrid..” her voice choked softly on the pain she felt.

His silver eyes gazed down at her in quizzically “But that is why I’m here to help.. “

She tilted her head back sorrow filling her big brown eyes “but they treat you like some kind of monster and they don’t remember or appreciate the things you do for them”

He sat her back gently his hands icy on her bare arms “It doesn’t matter.. I do it to help and if I’m helping it’s enough”

She shook her head in total confusion, her mind unable to grasp his simple answer “But .. Why give them such a generous gift if they do not even appreciate what you're doing?”

He tilted his head slowly “I help that is all, it’s simply what I do.”

Sondra slowly rubbed her temples “Alright Compassion if that is how you feel.. But I don’t have to like it.”

His handed her a cup of tea. 

She laughed gently “Thank you my friend”

He nodded his silver blue eyes sparkling brightly “I helped?”

“Yes Darling you did” she smiled laying one warm palm against his cheek.

His smile fell away as he almost pulled back from her, more like a flinch “I do not like it when you call me Darling or Dearest”

She snatched her hand away hurt dancing across her face “oh I’m sorry….. what did I say wrong Cole?”

He shook his head impatiently “No..no… it just sounds like Lady Vivienne and she dislikes... me a lot”

Sondra uttered a soft growl her hands clenching as she read his tangled mind and heard some of the things the Lady mage had called him.

“Ohhhhh that nasty harpy… I’ll set her perfect white robes and fake horns on fire” the air snapped and shimmered around her body as she whipped around the tea cup landing on the rug and marched for her door. 

“NO!” his arms wrapped around her from behind slamming her up against his chest as he lifted her off her feet, his floppy hat slapping her upside the head.

“WHY? That bitch dares to speak about you.. YOU of all spirits like that I’ll set her frigid ass on FIRE!!!” Sondra struggled in his arms like a living flame it was all Cole could do to keep her lifted off the floor.

“Please, don’t do this” his lips brushed her ear as he whispered softly, it was probably the gentleness of his request and the shock that stopped her tantrum in mid rant. 

With a deflated sigh her head dropped back against his shoulder as she went limp in his arms “Damn you Compassion…” her words were without any heat as she gave in to his gentle plea.

He warily set her back on her feet twirling her to face him, a rueful smile curled his lips and made his eyes dance like the stars in the heavens, his hands cupped her cheeks tilting her eyes up to his “Thank you Passion… for caring enough to try and defend me from the phony dragon lady.”

Sondra laughed warmly nuzzling her cheek into his right hand “Even clever assassins need a champion sometimes, so I’ll be yours.”

He nodded stepping back from her, she glanced up at him and noted his discomfort. Twirling around she grabbed a cup and filled it with hot tea and honey then offered it to him. He glanced at the cup then back at her with a bemused look. 

“I don’t need to eat or drink” his statement wasn’t meant to be hurtful or cruel it was just a simple fact. It still confused him as to why she did, she explained it as blending in and now it was just routine for her.

She laughed placing his hands around the cup and pushing him to sit down “True but it would help me feel better if you at least pretended”

He shrugged and settled back into the chair as she gracefully curled into her own chair to face him her brown eyes dancing with excitement as she began peppering him with questions about his travels. Once again they talked until the first rays of the morning sun began lighting the sky. He sat the now ice cold tea onto the table and moved to the balcony doors with a tiny nod to her he vanished from sight. She smiled wistfully at his departure before raising to move into the huge bed. She stretched until she was on her tiptoes letting every muscle in her body shift before releasing a deep contented sigh with that she crawled under the covers and drifted off for some much desired sleep.

Outside in the shadows of her balcony he watched her. She was a whirlwind of passion and fire, one that he had no idea how to understand. She confused him and if he wanted to be truly honest with himself she scared him. He only wanted to help people, to ease their pain. She could potentially cause great pain, he wasn’t totally clear on how but deep inside he was sure his help would be greatly needed with her here. Worse of all he felt something deep inside his own being shift and grind, he didn’t know what it was but he knew it wasn’t something he’d ever felt before.

She lay under the warmth of her blankets with a smile curling her lips as visions of silvery blue eyes danced in her mind. She felt more alive and vibrant when she was around Cole, he brought something deeper in her out to play and she was starting to realize she liked this new side of her nature she had not previously known about. Maybe it was simply because she could be herself around him, it was so nice to be able to not hide from what she was. With a soft contented sigh she let sleep claim her.

 

His head lifted slowly, his eyes narrowed as some of her slumbering thoughts drifted out to him. They were as chaotic and confusing as she was to him. He knew she didn’t quite feel or do the things he could, but she was just as powerful in her own way. The confusion so puzzled him that he did what he always did and vanished back to his room at the Herald’s Rest.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok so our little spirit finally gets to dance, picture a cross between Gypsy Dancing and Belly Dancing (totally wish I could dance), Our little spirit is going to find out some creatures are lustier then she could ever imagine. 
> 
> Also this chapter is one of the longest to date.
> 
> Enjoy..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If any reader's don't do well with things that cause panic or stress please skip this chapter while there is no assaults or anything of that nature. There is the triggering of feedback emotionally that causes a major panic attack. This warning will cover the next couple of chapters as well

Chapter 6:

The sounds of the bard’s music rippled through the air, someone else set a deeper pulse with drums and hidden in the deeper shadows was a haunting voice. There was no words with the voice simply a haunting melody. Her body shimmered and dipped, swirled and arched like the flames for which she was named. The outfit she wore while not totally revealing wasn’t meant to hide the beautiful lines of her body but to enhance and showcase them. The flowing red and gold scarves that hung from her hips to her ankles swayed playfully like fire dancing on the stage, the orange and red silk top that hugged her chest like a lover’s caress glinted and sparkled from tiny jewels sewn into it that caught and reflected the light, the tiny bells gracing her ankles and wrist sang when she moved.

Every dip, twirl and motion was meant to sooth and entice all at the same time. Her fiery hair cascaded down her back like living flame it coiled and swayed brushing her hips, flames kissing the air. Her back arched as her eyes closed lost to the power of her own passionate nature bare feet danced over the polished wood of the stage like a young halla racing gracefully through the forest.

By the time she sank to the floor of the stage in a practiced heap of flaming hair, fluttering silks and glistening skin, the overwhelmed Spirit of Compassion had fled. The thoughts hammered at him like the ocean waves crushing the hull of a ship in the middle of a storm. He was panting by the time he found a quiet sanctuary in one of the furthest towers. His head dropped into his hands trying to erase the graphic thoughts that had flooded his mind like a torrent of demons being spewed out of one the many rifts the Inquisitor was always trying to chase down and close.

Sondra stood gracefully and smiled as the huge crowd that cheered and whistled for her. Blowing kisses to the them she slipped behind the curtain to the small room hidden in the wall for her to change. 

One of the barmaids slipped in handing her a cold mug of water the girls worshipful gaze made Sondra smile. “Thank you Anallie I am so thirsty!” 

The girl giggled and blushed dipping a curtsy “your most welcome Mum” then she darted back out. 

Once she was dressed and her wild curls tamed she slipped back out into the crowd heading straight to Varric who was gathering coins from various people mostly Iron Bull and his Chargers. Sondra slipped up beside him and plucked a coin from Varric's hands, while she placed a kiss on his cheek with a sassy grin. The group stopped and just stared at her until she backed away uncomfortable with the intense scrutiny. Bull stepped forward and offered his massive hand to her, with a timid smile she took it and shook. She was hit with the brutal blast of lust that rolled off him like the avalanche that destroyed Haven. It was so raw and powerful that for the first time in her pseudo human life she felt fear and stepped back quickly out of his reach. He may have only had one eye but the way he looked at her, through her, left the woman shaken and ready to run for safety. 

Krem stepped up and nudge the big Qunari, he clapped one hand on Sondra’s shoulder with a wide grin “Damn woman you can dance!”.

She laughed brightly still not letting her guard down with Bull’s girth taking up so much space “Thank you Krem, your compliment is a gift I will cherish!”.

She didn’t see the telltale pink that curled along Krem’s cheeks as he sheepishly stepped back nodding his head. But Varric was picking up on Bull’s predatory gaze that seemed to single handedly devour Sondra. His gut told him he needed to get her out of here and quickly. 

Varric sidled up beside the girl like a protective father “Hey you look kind of tired kiddo why don’t I walk you back to your room?”

Tilting her head she smiled in gratitude for Varric’s perception “I’d like that very much.”

“I could walk her back to her room” Bull almost purred as he leaned forward.

“NO!” multiple voices rang out Varric’s, Krem’s and Sondra’s being the loudest.

Coughing softly Sondra scrambled to smooth the major outburst swiftly.

“I thank you Iron Bull but I really do need to speak to Varric and it’s kind of private” she offered a  
tentative smile. 

Bull stepped back and nodded his head slowly “Oh alright” turning he grabbed a tankard of ale and downed it.

Grabbing Varric’s hand she swiftly made her way out of the tavern well as swiftly as the dense crowd would allow for and the clinging hands and well wishers and now worshipful fans. Sondra was fairly panting by the time they reached the doors of the main hall. Varric ushered her inside and shut the big doors as he turned back around he could see she was starting to shake with a sigh he walked her to her room and made sure she was inside with the door locked before he went back down the hall, his hand slide down his face trouble followed that girl like a siren‘s song lured sailors to their deaths.

Sondra’s heart was still pounding inside her chest painfully after she washed quickly from her basin not even in the mood for a long soak. Dressed in her long flowing black silk night gown she curled up on the rug in front of her fireplace, arms held tightly around her waist as she shook from tremors of pure fear. As the spirit of passion she wasn’t easily shaken by dark desires and needs. But the waves that rolled off Bull spoke volumes that even her innocence knew would destroy her if he ever managed to get her alone in his bed. Even hidden inside her room, she was still being smothered by the Qunari warriors lust.

She didn’t realize how scared she truly was until arms slipped around and she twisted reacting out of pure primal terror, her mouth opened to let out the granddaddy of all screams as a cold hand slipped over her mouth to stifle the sound.

“Shhhh it’s me Cole.. I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you Passion!” Worry filled silver blue eyes bore into her panic stricken brown ones.

With a soft sob Sondra threw herself into Cole’s arms shaking hard enough to worry the assassin. “Passion what happened?” Cole’s soft voice whispered in her ear offering her a lifeline in the chaotic mess of her fear.

She shook her head wildly unable to calm herself enough to tell him what was scaring her so badly. His hands shifted as she tried to burrow into him, the force of her motion sent him onto his ass as she scrambled into his lap like a scared child, her head tucked under his chin and her knees digging into his ribs. The assassin sat patiently, arms wrapped around her trembling body as he gently soothed her, one large hand gliding slowly up and down her back. His voice was a soft gentle whisper against the crackling and popping of the fireplace. 

Finally after what seemed like hours she finally stopped trembling and pulled away enough to look up at him and offer a shy tear stained smile “thank you”

He eyed her warily one of his big hands coming up to settle like a butterfly on her cheek, he was out of his element here and he knew it “What happened?”

The fearful look swam in her eyes at the same time as her face went white. She ducked her head swiftly letting her thick hair act as a curtain to hide from his all seeing eyes.

“N.. no.. nothing .. I’m not sure… i don’t know how to explain it” her voice was a tiny whisper.

The callous’ on Cole's hand dug gently into her cheek as he tried to force her head back up, he gave up as she fought against him he had no wish to hurt her. He sighed and let her win this time his other arm dropped away as he felt her shift and pull away from him. She scooted off his lap with an embarrassed laugh her hands fluttering like trapped hummingbirds, until Cole reached up and gently stilled them.

“I’m so sorry I don’t know what came over me …” her voice trailed off and she still wouldn’t look up at him.

He frowned at the crown of her bent head “Let me Help…” 

“y..you already did!” her voice cracked softly.

“You're lying to me why?” Cole’s voice took on an edge.

Shaking her head quickly she turned to gaze into the fire “It’s nothing honestly Cole..”

Cole cocked his head, the floppy hat shuddered as he stood swiftly and vanished in a waft of gentle smoke.

Sondra brought her knees to her chest to rest her forehead against them. Tears dripped onto the black silk covering her knees. She berated herself for being such a ninny as of yet she still had no idea why she’d panicked like a frightened horse at the unbridled lust that had rolled off the Iron Bull and hit her. Maybe it was the intensity or the power of it, or maybe it was simply because she hadn’t been prepared she didn’t know, she only knew that he scared more than anyone else ever had and she did not know how to handle it and now because of her inability to talk about it she’d managed to chase Cole away.

Slowly she rose from the rug before the hearth, her body ached from the strain of her fear and she was tired. She curled up like a small child in the middle of the bed wishing desperately for sleep but also fearing it. Once in a great while she’d have a nightmare it wasn’t an all the time thing it was a once in a great while type thing. She lay there absently watching the shadows chase and dance across her wall as the flames flickered playfully in the hearth, helplessly she tried to will herself to sleep but it stayed just out of reach.

Just as she was about to finally give up and go back to sit before the hearth she felt the air shimmer and shift as Cole all but leaped out of the shadows and hit her bed his hands none to gentle as he pinned her shoulders down, his lean thighs trapping her under the blankets as he straddled her. She froze as he leaned in, his nose so close if she breathed deeply it would bump her. She knew her eyes had to be as wide as the tea cups she drank from and all she could manage was a squeak.

His voice was cold and lethal much more so now then when he’d meet her upon her arrival “why didn’t you tell me?”

She blinked slowly in confusion “tell you what?” her voice came out in a breathless rush.

His head cocked slowly like a predator testing the air before pouncing “about the tavern.. After your dance.. And the Iron Bull”

Confusion caused her to shake her head in bewilderment “but Cole.. Nothing happened not really.. I don’t understand …”

His silver blue eyes gleamed dangerously “I talked to Varric… and he’s worried about you”

“Um ok but I’m in here…. I’m safe now…..” she offered a very timid and shy smile trying desperately to diffuse Cole’s ice cold rage.

He leaned closer his lips a hair's breath from her ear and his hat smacking her in the forehead “are you sure about that?”

She opened her mouth to reply but for the first time in a long, long while she found herself too dumbstruck to articulate anything. So instead she shrugged helplessly, and let her mind reach out to his and that’s when she got a shock. His mind was raging and she seen more then she should have, more than she ever wanted to. He’d not only talked to Varric but he had went and sat in the tavern picking up a lot of smutty fantasies involving her. But the one’s that chilled her to the very core were the one’s he’d picked up from the Iron Bull himself. The images that Cole had picked up were terrifying to her, even though she was the spirit of passion she gifted people with the ability to finally speak to that special someone, or sing because they loved it, or dare to try something their heart desired to do. Never in all her years had she ever seen anything to compare to the brutal power and passion of a Qunari warrior in full blown lust. 

Cole’s right hand release her shoulder to grasp her face forcing her to look at him he literally hissed at her “Stop it right now… look at me Sondra… look..at..me”

She was gasping violently for air, her chest hadn’t hurt like this since she possessed this body. She was sucking air into her lungs so hard she was arching up with enough strength to lift Cole. The fear and panic was starting to unravel her mind afraid of what she would do to herself Cole reacted.

He reached into her mind and latched on with the tenacity of a mabari war hound. He forced her to sleep and brought her into the Fade with him the only place he could think of to keep her from slipping into some terrified nightmare place inside her own head. His only wish was to help her since he felt it was his fault that she found out about Bull’s sexual fantasy starring her, chains, ropes, and whips and her total submission. Which he was currently acting out with a very willing tavern girl.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slipping in towards more awkward situations between people. Mild nudity warning but nothing wild.
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy.

It was almost a month later before Sondra finally allowed Krem to corner her alone. She stood waiting quietly as her gaze watched Krem fidget with his armor, his belt, his gloves. Finally with an exasperated sigh she reached out and grabbed his hands. For all his strength as a warrior he didn’t scare her, he was a good man. His thoughts were so turbulent she couldn’t get a read on what was going through his mind. Krem went still and looked into her warm brown eyes as she smiled at him, he almost forgot why he wanted to speak to her, then he shook his head clearing the cobwebs. 

“My Lady I beg you to hear me out” Krems voice usually so melodic and pleasant sounded strained and worried.

She nodded her head slowly encouraging him to go on. Her stomach felt like the ocean off Storm Coast it was rolling so badly.

He swallowed painfully before he attempted to speak “I apologize for the actions of the Chief when you danced.”

Sondra pulled back sighing one hand lifting to run across her face, she was still confused and ashamed of her fear and that it still unnerved even after all this time. But she couldn’t control how it would snake through her mind occasionally and scare the hell out of her. Because she hadn’t known until later the next day that after Iron Bull had worn out his tavern girl, he’d come to the Great hall looking for her room. It had taken Varric and Dorian with some help from Cole to convince the big Qunari he was making an ass out of himself. He’d been loud about his needs and it wasn’t until Varric leveled Bianca at him that he realized the three men were serious about protecting the girl and that she’d merely danced because she loved it not to lure men to her bed.

She fought the urge to walk away from Krem before this talk became embarrassing for the both of them.

Krem rushed on before she could bolt “He would never ever, ever force you into his bed!… Please believe me when I say that no matter how loyal me and the Charger’s are we’d never condone something like that nor would we lie about it for him”

Taking a shuddering breath she simply nodded not trusting her voice just then.

Krem let out a rattling sigh “He’s fairly beating his big dumb ass up about it. And Cole ripping him a new one didn’t help, followed by Varric threatening the Chief’s favorite body parts.. Well it did get pretty funny.. Also the Inquisitor himself came and had a sit down, I don’t know what got said then but I’d be willing to hazard a guess.” 

Krem offered a sheepish smile to her which she returned shyly her voice was low and soft when she finally replied “Thank you Krem.. I honestly needed to hear that”

Krem nodded slowly his gaze resting on her face he opened his mouth but then shut it again but the question was plain in his eyes.

She cocked her head slowly “What is it Krem?”

“Um are you.. Uh.. Well you know.. Like ..ummm Cole?” Krem ducked his head sheepishly but watched her from under his lashes.

Sondra froze for a split second but giggled softly shaking her head with a nervous motion “You’re a silly man Krem… Cole is a unique one of kind”.

“Hmmm yeah I guess it was a silly question…” he stared at her moment longer before nodding respectfully and turning on his heel to leave. She didn’t think he believed her.

Sondra let out a shuddering sigh as she pressed one hand against her rolling stomach. She’d been bombarded with poisonous thoughts from various people in Skyhold, had heard the horrid evil things they called Cole. It still angered her that they would think it but not a one of them outside Lady Vivienne and Sera had the courage to call him some of those names to his face. It broke her heart and pissed her off all at the same time that she couldn’t confront them with all the good things Cole done around this frigid fortress for them and not one of them had the ability to thank the lanky assassin. With a heavy heart and need to burn something she went back to her room.

Her restlessness was so hard to reign it that she finally filled up the deep copper tub and poured oils into the steaming water before she slipped out of her clothes and sank into its welcoming embrace. Draping her long hair outside the rim of the tub she uttered a contented sigh as she sunk down and relaxed. But relaxation and the warm steaming water made it far too possible for her mind to wander off into forbidden territories and dangerous waters. 

Eyes closed she replayed the morning she woke up wrapped in Cole’s arms, the feeling that had languidly rolled through her body was not one she was honestly familiar with. She’d lain there safe in the security his arms offered, his goofy hat slipped down to partially cover both their faces and their noses were almost touching. His breath danced lightly over her face tickling her nose, but it was the unfurling of heat deep in her stomach that had really shocked her. She knew what it meant because well she was the Spirit of Passion after all and she had manipulated the Fade many a time to bring passionate dreams to those sleeping, but never had she ever felt those same feelings, until now.

She had bitten down on her bottom lip and wrestled the intense desire to stroke her hand across the sleeping spirit’s cheek as she brushed her lips to his. The strength of the urge was so strong she felt her stomach muscles tighten painfully, it was harsh enough to cause her long legs to pull up into her abdomen. But behind the lustful need to touch him and see his beautiful silver blue eyes open up for her, was the underlying tender need to just curl closer into his warmth to just feel the safe and secure haven his arms offered. The wildness of her emotions actually kind of scared her if she wanted to be brutally honest with herself. Not once since she’d bolted awake in this created body had she ever wanted to lose herself in someone else, so badly as she did him.

It baffled her mind that a spirit such as she could be so torn by a yearning for one being, let alone another spirit. Cole was innocent beauty and gentleness honed with the killing power of a very deadly predator, but otherwise he was guileless and dense when it came to lust and passion. She on the other hand was a creature of pure passion, she knew what it meant to desire and burn for someone but she also knew she could never, ever allow herself to fall into that deadly trap. If she did and the person she trusted found out her secret she knew her life would be ended painfully. Only a few people knew what she was, and of those one of them was dead now.

She settled for caressing the lines of his face with her eyes and ruefully whispering “well aren’t we just a fine pair”

Between one blink and the next she was alone in the big bed, the lose of his presence hit her like a physical blow. A soft sad little sigh escaped her lips as her hand crept out to rest in the spot his head had been resting just moments before, the delicate long digits trembled slightly as she let it lay where his cheek would have been.

A heartbroken sigh slipped out, as she sat in the tub, the sadness that was creeping into her heart was becoming painful. She wasn't stupid, she knew the growing feelings that were building up inside her couldn't ever be acted upon. That didn't stop her very nature from playing with the idea, but it annoyed her that they were becoming a consuming ache.

So caught up in her own mind it was too late when the whisper of the air around her room and the soft building of tension alerted her a second too late, her head snapped up and she stared into the very wide and shock filled blue eyes of an extremely embarrassed assassin. 

“Oh Hi Cole you're back from your trip!!” She chirped pushing all her acting talents to the limits, instead of sinking into the water and just drowning herself.

Cole’s mouth open and closed a few times as his eyes darted frantically trying to find some place to settle that wasn’t on her or the big tub she was relaxing in. Even though most of her was underwater, it just added to the sensual illusion.

But before she could reign in her passionate and lusty mind it merrily skipped down the path of Cole shedding his clothes and sinking into the tub with her. His eyes snapped to hers as the fires of total embarrassment raced up from below the water's surface to engulf her up to her hairline. Poof he vanished and her head snapped back with a thud into the rim of the tub as she groaned her humiliation was complete now.

Cole leaned his head against the ice cold tower wall, his favorite hat being crushed as he tried to figure out what the hell just happened and why was it even affecting him. His stomach was clenched and his teeth gritted painfully. But one sad little thought slipped through all the chaos and that was simply he’d hurt her when he ran away just now. Sucking in a very, very cold deep breath Cole vanished and reappeared on her balcony. With his hat covering his face he gently knocked on her door.

Sondra’s head snapped up so fast it was painful, but not nearly as bad as slipping as she tried to jump out of the tub. She shrieked as she slipped and twisted, her leg buckling under and her upper body going one way she hit the floor in a thud of pain and tears. Her hip hurt so bad she didn’t even care that Cole threw her balcony door open hard enough to rattle the glass, he was on his knees beside her lifting her to relieve the pressure on hip and leg. But he almost dropped her too, only because the oils she’d added to the hot water left her body slippery and the only thing that saved her was the cloth wrapped around both of Cole’s hands it snagged on the dampness of her skin and made it to where he could lift her and carry her to the bed gently laying her on it he pulled the covers up enough to make her decent but left the hip she’d hurt exposed to his worried gaze.

“Sondra how bad is it?” his eyes caught the fact that her hip was already turning a darker color.

Dropping her head back she sighed “It’s going to be very sore later but nothing's’ broken, my pride on the other hand is badly damaged” she put both hands over her face.

Gently he pried her hands off her face and stared into her eyes “I’m sorry I startled you in the bath… Cassandra is always getting onto me about just showing up in someone’s private space”

She blinked owlishly up at him “Ummm yeah ok no worries… that’s it you're just worried about my privacy?..”

He nodded absently as he looked at her hip already turning an angry purple color, satisfied nothing was broken he moved the blankets to cover her bare leg and hip. He felt the chaotic swirling of her thoughts, but managed to keep his face completely innocent as he gazed back at her. He did not under any circumstance want her to know that he’d read her thoughts loud and clear when he’d clumsily poofed into her room. But deeper still he didn’t want her to know that he’d lain there that morning hearing her thoughts as well as feeling her emotions caress at the edges of his mind.

She shook her head and smiled ruefully up at him “Who knew a dancer could be so darn clumsy huh?”

He looked down at her in confusion “You're not clumsy.. You’re a beautiful dancer all fire and grace and passion..” 

Her mouth dropped open and his snapped shut as it hit him just how much he had revealed to her with those few words.

“I.. uh I have to go.. Now.. Uhhhh” he floundered 

“cole…” her whisper shredded his self control and he vanished.

She ran her hands through her hair in total frustration, not sure what in the world was going on anymore. He was hiding in his shadowy corner of the Herald's Rest wondering how he was going to get the image of her wet and naked out of his head.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short Chapter cleaning up some various threads.
> 
> Enjoy.

It took a few days before Sondra could walk around Skyhold and not limp like a lame horse. But for those few days she tortured herself and worried over her increasingly bizarre reactions to Cole. She looked at it from every angle she could conceivably look at it from. But still it puzzled her, she fluttered toward him like a moth to a flame. But when she watched him interact around other people he acted naïve and almost childlike. But she knew from one on one interaction that he wasn’t, it was simply a mask he wore. But it bothered her that he wore that mask and wore it a little too well.

Stifling a deep sigh Sondra made her way downstairs into the great hall, her mind was so filled with other things she didn’t realize she’d walked into a rotunda until she caught the scent of herbal paints. She stopped and followed the lines of the fresco, moving closer her hand raised but did not touch them, her eyes admired and adored the lines and the pictures that depicted elven history and mythos. So heart rending where some of the pictures that she had to wipe tears from her cheeks, the passion and pain of wanting and needing to go home came through from the painter’s heart.

“You like them?” the melodic voice come softly from over her shoulder.

“yes I do.. So intense so passionate” her voice was barely a whisper so caught up in the emotions.

“I thank you then Lady..” the voice came closer and with it the deep unbridled power.

Sondra shivered body and soul, in her heart she knew if anyone could send her back to what she had been before it would be this man. 

She turned and offered a timid smile “I do apologize for invading your room without asking.”

He flickered a glance at her but then returned to looking at the fresco she’d been standing before. “Not to worry I’m getting used to it around here.”

She cocked her head “You must be Solas...”

He finally looked at her, his eye’s burrowed inside her like a wolf’s jaws deep inside the belly of a stag. “I suppose I must be”

Standing here facing the power that this man held in check she felt real fear, more so than even the fear of Iron Bull’s unbridled passions. Looking eye to eye with Solas she knew in a split moment that he knew exactly what she was.

His small smile did nothing to make him less dangerous “Be easy tiny spirit… I do not bite.. Well not often anyways.”

Sondra blinked slowly “You know”.

His head cocked at her statement and he nodded with the barest motion “Of course”

He saw the deflate of her shoulders and the bowing of her head, one brow cocked slowly.

“Are you going to send me back?” she wouldn’t raise her eyes to look at him.

He stood, hands clasped behind his back and laughed deeply. When he stopped he smirked at her finally catching her eye “Why would I?”

Never in all her time occupying this body had she felt more like a small girl being gently reprimanded by a parent as she did right then. Her smile burst through bathing him in its warm glow before she bound out of his room. His eyes followed her a very speculative look on his face.  
He was starting to think that she was the reason behind the sudden change in Cole’s demeanor.

With her heart lighter than it had been in weeks she made her way to the stables to visit the horses. Something about the long legged beautiful animals called to her soul and when allowed she happily came to the stables to visit the beautiful animals. She slipped in and went to the pretty paint mare with the heart on her forehead, cooing she feed the mare an apple and rubbed her velvety nose. There was something so soothing about the way the mare huffed warmly against her palm and her lips tickled looking for more treats.

It took awhile for the tendrils of desire to sneak out and touch her mind. But when it did she buried her face into her arm. She was picking up someone’s very, very passionate thoughts about Lady Josephine and they were so deep it almost buckled Sondra’s legs. But being the nosey creature she was, she went looking to see whom it could be. Process of elimination left the big black bearded Grey Warden. Her lips curled as she decided to butt into this romantic unrequited love and give it a tiny push in the right direction because hey that’s what the spirit of passion was all about.

“Goodmorning Warden Blackwall” Sondra walked over to stand by the big man who was working on a large size piece of wood.

Blackwall glanced up a smile wiggling his facial hair “Well good morning to you as well Lass”

Her head cocked as she looked at the wood “What are you working on? If I maybe so nosy” 

Blackwall chuckled “I enjoy wood carvings, so this piece called to me and wants to become a griffin, the majestic symbol of the Grey Wardens.”

Sondra looked from the wood back to the man and grinned “You can see that in the wood?”

Blackwall nodded the corners of his eyes crinkled showing his hidden grin.

“Amazing!…. Huh I wonder if Lady Josephine likes Griffins.. I know she adores books of poetry..” Flashing a smile that could blind the sun itself she twirled and walked away.

Sondra wandered up to the battlements, it was cold but she loved the majestic view that could only truly be admired from the battlements. Her mind slipped off as she started comparing the icy whiteness to the white blonde locks of a certain assassin. She rubbed the bridge of her nose huffing softly and mumbling under her breath. It wasn’t until she lifted her head to gaze back out over the battlements that she realized she was standing under a very, very large shadow.

“You’re a hard Lady to pin down” the deep rumble came from behind her.

The words froze her, she only managed a tiny squeak. She heard the sound of flesh on flesh behind her back and deep groan.

“That is so not how that was suppose to come out” he snorted softly.

Gathering every bit of courage she could possibly muster, Sondra turned to look up into the apologetic face of the Iron Bull. 

“Um hello Iron Bull.. Sir…” she started stuttering.

Rubbing his hand over his face he pinned her with his one good eye “Look little girl… I’m Qunari yes, but I’m not a monster and I do not ever force women.. Or men for that matter.. Into my bed.. They come willing or not at all.. Got it?”

She blinked owlishly “Yes.. Sir..”

He nodded his massive head “Good.. Now that, that’s settled your better come by the Tavern sometime .. The Charger’s miss you little girl” 

She watched him walk off and released the held breath, all the fear and insanity, and that was so very anti-climatic. With a shrug of her shoulders she moved on to enjoy the crisp winter day and to see who else she could help with her ability. Then she’d head to the tavern and visit everyone, she really had missed fun atmosphere of the place.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here's your heads up this Chapter starts the Erotica, not full on in this Chapter.. but its the build up..
> 
> Enjoy.

Having finally come to terms with her fear of the Iron Bull, Sondra began visiting the tavern on a regular basis again. She still couldn’t bring herself to dance, the unchecked emotions swirling around Skyhold left the people too weak to control their basic emotions and she didn’t want to start a war inside the fortress. But she did sing to entertain the various people that worked so hard to keep the fortress up and running. Between her own voice and Maryden’s musical talents and singing they made the tavern a very popular place to be. Which tickled Cabot to no end, he’d had to order more and more ale to keep up with all the patrons.

But after weeks of endless white and being unable to dance and stretch her body it was wearing on her emotional state. She wasn’t used to sitting idle, and her body was getting sluggish do to the lack of exercise. She was pacing her room, back and forth like a caged animal when Cole popped in. She whirled on him with the enthusiasm of a pouncing tiger her hands gripping his upper arms and a frantic look in her brown eyes.

“COLE… you have to help me … NOW!!” she fairly vibrated.

Cole was taken aback by her attack on his person “Uh what can I do?”.

She shook him and none too gently either “I need to dance and soon!!! I’m going insane”

Cole looked down at her like she’d already lost her mind, his confusion so evident on his face that she released him with a sigh and began pacing again.

She threw her hands up in the air in frustration “Oh never mind” the fire inside the hearth roared like an angry dragon as it whooshed up the chimney. Her magic as churlish as she was.

Cole opened himself up to her and heard the pain of her body needing to do something anything but sit around idle, passion was anything but an idle emotion. Sondra felt his hands settle onto her shoulders and his floppy hat smack her head as he leaned in.

“I know how to help.” his voice curled around her like a long lost friend.

An hour later Cole had rearranged her room and left the heart and soul of it opened and bare of rugs. Sondra gazed on in rapt attention as he purposely moved around her room moving chairs, tables, rugs, free standing sconces, and anything else he deemed unneeded. When he was done he had cleared an area a little bigger then her stage at the tavern. Then he popped out and came back a few minutes later holding a set of hand drums and a big cheesy smile. Sondra threw back her head and laughed from pure joy. 

She held up one hand and raced behind the changing screen tucked in one corner of her room to change into one of her dancing outfits, the one she chose was all shades of blue and white, intricately inlaid and enhanced by the purest of silver. She chose it because it reminded her of Cole, all winter and ice. She hardly ever wore this outfit because the top barely covered her breasts, but she loved the way it flowed and melted around her body like a cascade of snow and water. She added a silver belly chain and silver bells at her wrist and ankles. Just because only Cole was going to be in the room she removed the choker from around her neck.

When she almost ran back out, Cole was seated on the ground with only a rug under him, in the very center of the space he’d cleared the drums resting on his lanky criss-crossed legs. His leather coat and weapon belt was in one of the chairs he’d moved out of the way. He watched her from under the brim of his floppy hat until she nodded to him and his hands began to coax a deep thrumming sound from the drums. She grinned at him, impressed because she hadn’t known he could work drums.

She bowed her head letting the beat of the drums invade her body and soul, once her feet and hands picked up the beat she began to move. Hands twirled caressing the air like a lover, feet softly tapped and roamed over the cool stone flooring causing her hips and stomach to roll and sway like the trees when a gentle breeze is blowing against them. Her head feel back causing her long neck to arch, the flaming fall of hair swirled letting the cool blues of her scarves peek through. 

As Cole drummed and Sondra danced the room heated and sweat glistened on both of them, her body moved with a primal rhythm and watching her dance was, for Cole, like slipping inside someone’s head and seeing their sexual fantasies played out. His eyes never left her as she danced and spun and dipped and swayed. Being this close to her and being so much like her, he could feel her power reaching out and wrapping itself around him like a cat arching and demanding attention. He admired her spirit, beauty, passion and the fiery essence that simply was the Spirit of Passion. 

Her head tilted forward and brown eyes lidded with a deeply seductive look, watching him watch her brought something so deeply primal and wild from a part of herself she didn’t even know she had. It reared it’s passionate head and it was going to come out and play, damn the consequences. Hips rolling and long legs taking smooth languid steps she prowled closer to him, somewhere inside the rational side of her mind she knew the game she was going to play would most like bite her in the ass, but she just didn’t give a nug shit at this very moment and she let the very essence that was passion loose to play.

Between the raw sexual power of her body, she added a new element to the fold and started to sing, the sound of her voice washed over Cole like warm honey, he felt his body shudder from the sheer power of what was simply her. He blinked and when he did he was gazing into the undulating swirling of her belly, the silver chain sparkled and twinkled, she was dancing as close as possible to him without actually touching him. The silk scarves fluttering around her long legs and swaying hips, would dance out and brush his skin if she moved just right. Cole swallowed harshly trying to maintain the rhythm of the drums and not let the things going on inside her head drown him. 

She danced all around him, dipping and swaying, all the while her voice sang a seductive song. She made several sensual trips around him, moving so that either the scarves brushed against him or her hair teased him. She dropped to her hands and knees in front of him, every line of her body humming with desires, wants and needs. Silver blue eyes locked with burning brown one’s and suddenly Cole knew what it felt like to be the hunted and not the hunter. With slow deliberate motions Sondra’s hands slide from the floor to his knees, and with a growl that would have put any large cat to shame she shoved the drums off his lap and started to climb on top of him. Desperately Cole grabbed for her upper arms to try and hold her back, but the sensual purr that erupted from her throat made him realize just what a wrong move that had been. Sondra lowered her body until she brushed softly against his tunic, her hands slithered up his chest until the warmth from them seemed to scald him. This close and eye to eye, Cole had no illusions about what she was going to do. 

Her hands clasped his face and before he could blink or breath her lips captured his like molten fire, Cole’s mind went blank as her mouth branded him. It was the deep seductive moan she released against his mouth that shocked him out of his stupor, his hands grasped hot damp flesh as he forced her back. She devoured his face with her eyes as she licked her lips, but her hands snaked into his hair and she pulled. It took all Cole’s strength to keep her at bay, he knew her instinctual nature was overriding her humanity. He was also sure as it snowed almost daily in Skyhold that she’d be guilt ridden afterwards.

“No..” his voice was whisper soft, but it cut through her sexual daze like the cracking of a whip.

Her smoldering eyes blink rapidly as she fought her own nature back into it’s cage, then the shame and humiliation came crashing down on her. With a sickening sob she threw herself off the top of Cole, scrambling like a wild animal seeking refugee. The guilt he knew would tear her up hit, he felt it smother the very air around him.

“Sondra?” Cole was on his knees one hand stretched out to her. 

“OUT.. Get OUT” she darted to her bed seeking the safety of it.

“I’m sorry I was trying to help..” Cole’s voice softly pleaded from the side of her bed.

“GO AWAY COLE” she reared up and screamed at him. 

Hanging his head, shoulders slumped he vanished. Her pain was almost a physical blow to him and he wanted to help but he knew this moment wasn’t the right time.

She curled in the middle of the big bed shaking from the force of the desire still coursing through her body, it felt like she was going to shatter at any moment. She was panting with the violence of it. She hadn’t wanted Cole to stay and see her like this, he wouldn’t understand what she needed at that moment. She was humiliated by her actions, but her desire for him had rode her hard and she just wanted for once in her life the passion and love that other people got to enjoy. Was it so wrong of her to want something for herself, it must be because this turned into a total disaster. 

Over an hour later she had calmed her body enough to get up from the bed. She needed to change out of the costume that now seemed to mock her, and as she looked down at the beautiful silvery blue outfit, after slipping into a nightgown she cried. She’d worn it because it made her think of him when she looked at it. She slipped all the pieces of the beautiful dancing costume off and with a heavy heart and tears raining down her cheeks she walked to fire place and tossed the outfit into the heart of it, then using her fire abilities she heated the flames until nothing was left of it not even the silver chains. Shaking with her arms clamped around her middle, she walked back to her bed and curled under the covers. She was deeply ashamed of her actions, she knew he didn’t have any idea what her nature was truly like, and she’d used his ignorance to try and take advantage of him. With that running through her mind she cried herself to sleep for the first time in her existence.

From the shadows of her balcony, Cole watched her destroy the costume that he’d thought so beautiful upon her, saw the tears fall down her cheeks. He placed one hand on the frigid glass as a matching tear slipped down his pale cheek, her pain raced over him like a living entity.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is one of my favorite Chapters its fun and makes me smile. No Erotica... but it has Fenris and Varric.. Almost forgot to add that this is a long chapter as well.
> 
> Enjoy.

Sondra spent the next several weeks wandering Skyhold, her mind clouded and confused as she let the turbulence in her heart color everything around her. Including her singing for the tavern patrons to the point Cabot started complaining about her melancholy chasing paying customers away. She gave up going to the tavern, mostly out of fear that she’d run into Cole. She’d been very careful so far to not be anywhere he was, and it seemed like he was avoiding her as well. She just wasn’t ready to face him yet, and honestly she was being a coward which was a totally new emotion for her as well.

Now she spent time in the garden’s gazebo where the mage’s used magic to keep the foliage from being stifled by winter’s icy touch, and to keep the healer’s supplied with medicinal herb’s. She found the garden relaxing and soothing at the same time, it help calm some of the rioting emotions that kept her guilt alive. Varric had taken up calling her Little Broody, because of her sad woeful demeanor. She rested her cheek on her knees staring off into the red roses gracing one trellis, wondering if maybe she was taking this whole thing with Cole far too personally. He was after all the Spirit of Compassion not the Spirit of Lust or Love. At least he wouldn’t try and use her in a nefarious plot like another spirit had, it still hurt her when she thought about the things Justice had done in Kirkwall and that it ultimately had cost Ander’s his life.

“So why are you hiding out here Kitten?” the familiar deep baritone wrapped around her like a hug.

“FENRIS!!!!” she launched off the bench like a fiery tempest and hit the elven man hard enough he grunted.

“Hello to you too..” one of his rare smiles curved his lips as he hug the little tempest.

She kissed his cheek hugging him tightly, her voice broke softly “I’ve missed you big Brother..”

Fenris set her back his calloused thumbs wiping the tears off her cheeks “I’ve missed you too Kitten.. why are you leaking?”

“When did you get here…where’s Hawke.. Where have you been?..because I’m happy to see you!” she barely inhaled getting all that out.

He laughed shaking his head “Easy, easy little kitten.. Just recently.. Sophia’s resting.. And in hiding… I’m not going to cry even if I am glad to see you”

She dragged him to the bench and curled up beside him, gazing up at the tattooed ex-slave adoringly like a little sister. She loved Varric like a father, and Sophia was like a sister, but Fenris was the one she turned too when she had worries that she felt she couldn’t handle. He was the most dangerous man she’d ever meet, but he was also the most brutally honest. He knew her for what she was, and grudgingly accepted her, he had taken the time to help her harness her natural passions. She shoulder bumped him playfully grinning like a kitten in the yarn basket.

“Wait.. you’ve been here for awhile?..haven’t you?” she mock frowned at him.

“Now don’t get your fur all ruffled.. We had to keep it quiet.. which wasn’t easy since Sophia has been dying to see you.” Fenris gently tug a lock of her hair.

She smiled and hugged him again “ok I can understand that.. I was so worried about you both”.

“We worried about you too Kitten… Sophia wanted to take you with us when we left Kirkwall.. but the threat we were under was worse than leaving you safely in the town.” He tweaked her nose gently.

She nodded thoughtfully “I would have slowed you down..”.

“So Varric tells me you’ve been setting Skyhold on it’s ear..” he gazed at her fondly.

Sondra went into a long detailed story of her coming to Skyhold. He listened patiently and asked questions just because she had a problem with jumping from one subject to another and if he wanted the whole picture he had to rein in her natural exuberance. He noticed she shied away from talking about the Spirit Boy that lurked around Skyhold. That made him all the more curious about the rumors Varric had been telling him and Sophia.

It always amazed him that he hadn’t killed her when he’d figured out what she was, his sword had been drawn and pointed at her, Sophia had screamed at him but that didn’t stop his hand. Sondra’s open honesty stayed his hand. He’d known her a few years before he put it together. She told him everything as she knelt on the wet stones of Kirkwall, rain pouring down on them all. In the end he had to be honest with himself he just couldn’t kill her, she looked like a sad drowned kitten, so he lifted her up to her feet with a warning that he would kill her if she ever turned into an abomination. But as the years passed he became fond of the girl and had taken her under his wing, now he’d more likely kill for her instead of killing her.

Fenris held up one hand “All this yammering and yet you’ve not once mentioned the Spirit Boy.”

Sondra gnawed her lower lip, a nervous tick “Ummm well …”

Fenris lifted one white brow slowly “Kitten.. Is there something you need to tell me?”

“What? He’s here somewhere.. Probably too smart to face you and your sword..because your reputation precedes you always!” she smirked impishly.

“Flattery will get you no where little girl.. Varric says that he thinks you and the boy had... a spat..” his arms crossed over his chest.

Sondra sputtered “What!!! Nooo.. Why would he even.. Ugggg” she threw her arms up in frustration. Then got up and started pacing the gazebo.

Fenris smirked and stood up grabbing her arms and bringing her to a halt then he pinned her with a look “uh huh… so you're interested in him”.

She gaped at him like a fish out of water “Are you nuts?.. He’s the Spirit of Compassion.. He’s not interested in those kinds.. of.. things….that.. whatever Fennie..”

He gave her a brotherly shake “No man, human or spirit could not fall for you Kitten.. You’re a beautiful woman filled with passion…If he doesn’t see that then he’s a fool”

She sighed tiredly and laid her head on his shoulder “I made a fool out of myself.. I am so stupid Fennie..”

“What happened Kitten?” he slipped an arm around her, he sighed Maker he hated that nickname.

She gnawed her lower lip “You know how.. well I can’t go too long without dancing..”

“Uh huh..” he rumbled gently.

“I was climbing the walls… so I begged Cole to help me.. and he did.. he’s so thoughtful and generous.. he set up my room so I could dance..” she took a moment to breath, Fenris stayed silent. 

“I danced.. and I lost control.. he looked so handsome sitting there the drums in his hands..the fire dancing over him..his adorable floppy hat tilted down….” she got a distracted dreamy look on her face, Fenris nudged her.

“I practically jumped him… no I did jump him.. like some kind of lustful monster..” her voice deepened with pain and shame. 

“I climb him like a .. harlot.. and I.. uh.. kissed him..roughly” her face went up in flames.

“I felt so ashamed when he asked me to stop.. I screamed at him to get out.. I lashed out at him for no other reason then I was ashamed of myself..” she pulled away from him to stare down at her hands.

“So you danced for him and he didn’t like it?...I’ve never known you to dance solo for anyone before..and You kissed him...that’s new..you set Ander’s robes on fire for trying that” Fenris looked puzzled.

She rubbed her forehead and muttered “Nooooo… I almost took him regardless of whether or not he was willing.. I became a monster…. and Ander’s was a nice guy but .. yeah..”.

Fenris looked at her then laughed, she blinked up at him like a baby owl “So your telling me you figured out what being a woman was actually all about and he wasn’t gutsy enough to accept it?”

She frowned at him like he’d grown a second head “No… I threw myself on him like a wanton tramp.. I scared him half to death.. I’m not sure I see the hilarity in that..”

Fenris frowned back at her and shook his head “No Kitten.. what happened was you finally found the man that you’d be willing to become a woman with.. that does not make you a monster..but it does make him a fool for not wanting you.”

Sondra shook her head, at Fenris’s frown “It’s ok Fennie.. If he doesn’t want me.. I understand..” she smiled wistfully “Cole is unique and special.. He’s ice and mystery.. A cold and deadly assassin.. But gentle and tender when he lifts up a tiny kitten..he’s sweet and kind..”

Fenris’s eyes narrowed as he watched the change on her expressive face “Oh hell.. Varric is right..”

She blinked owlishly “About what?” she started pacing again.

“You're falling for the Spirit Boy…he did more than wake up your womanly desires… he woke up your heart” he looked more like a cranky father then the adopted brother now.

Sondra laughed nervously “Uhh your nuts and Varric’s in love with his crossbow so really he doesn’t get to point fingers at me”

“HA… you didn’t deny it young lady” Varric walked out of the shadows to join them “and you leave Bianca out of this.”

Sondra’s hands planted on her hips “You're both insane you know this right?”

“Your one to talk Missy.. You’ve been moping around Skyhold like a kicked kitten.. And the Kid’s become temperamental and snippy..” Varric wagged his finger at her.

“That’s my fault how???” She frowned down at the dwarf.

“Oh maybe something to do with a steaming tub and a naked redhe…” she clamped a hand over his mouth.

“BY THE MAKER… how did you find out about that?” Sondra wanted to scream in frustration.

Varric smirked “the Kid needed someone to talk to about it...I’m putting that into a book..”

“What?” the growl that came from Fenris promised death.

Both the girl and the dwarf whipped around and Sondra threw herself against him.

“NO no no Fennie please.. Its not what you think honestly.. He doesn’t understand boundaries and was coming to visit… he left quickly and well I slipped getting out of the tub he felt my pain and came to help.. I swear that’s all that happened.” Sondra was almost breathless trying to get that all out in a rush.

Varric started snickering “uh huh.. Harmless flirtations..... As she faces the scariest man I’ve ever meet to protect the Kid”

Sondra turned and glared down at the dwarf “Not helping here Varric!.. I hope Bianca makes you sleep on the couch tonight.”

Fenris leaned in catching her eye “He had better not throw your love away little girl.. Or I will kill him”.

Sondra rocked back eyes going wide “I never said anything about love…”

Fenris cocked his head smirking “Kitten you can’t hide your emotions from me you know that.. I can see right through you…”

Varric huffed “and for your information Bianca never makes me sleep on the couch”

Sondra was still shaking her head at Fenris “He doesn’t see me that way, probably never will or can.. He’s my friend..he is the Spirit of Compassion… not Carnal Knowledge....”

Fenris snorted “What’s that got to do with You wanting him… or possibly loving him?” he tapped her nose.

“Wasn’t it you little girl who gave me the lecture about being a nug’s ass to Sophia?.. maybe you should take your own advice..” his smirk was pure arrogance.

She rubbed her temples, shaking her head “do people just go insane when they walk through the gates of Skyhold?”

Fenris shrugged “I have no idea.. But I am going to go check on my wife for now, you’ll come by the tavern later she’s missed you Kitten”

“I’m not saying I’m in love… and you're both completely nug shit crazy!..” she was exasperated with the both of them 

“and of course I’ve missed Sophia deeply..maybe she’ll make sense out of you two” she sighed.

She watched Fenris walk away, teeth worrying her lower lip. There was no way they could be right, she couldn’t be in love with Cole. Could she, they hadn’t known each other very long and he was busy helping the Inquisition. She didn’t even know what love honestly was, as in had never even vaguely loved someone like that. She rubbed the bridge of her nose feeling a headache coming on.

Varric reached out and caught her arm before she could leave “Hey kiddo, all teasing aside, I am worried about the Kid, rumors are starting to spread about him. I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but please see if you can get him over it.” 

Fear for Cole, sent her stomach to burning and with a clipped nod she hurried off, her mind in turmoil. She mentally berated herself for causing the Spirit of Compassion discomfort, she had never meant to cause him to lose focus, she’d simply wanted to be around another like herself. Suddenly she realized just how selfish and greedy that was, what she’d wanted and what she’s blindly allowed to happen, were two sorry problems and she needed to fix them.

It was late before she headed back to her rooms, tired but the worry eating at her wouldn’t allow her to rest. She paced her room, changed her into her one of long nightgowns and then paced some more. She knew she had to do something and fairly soon, if Varric was worried enough to come to her then things could turn ugly soon. Making up her mind swiftly before she could chicken out she let her distress roll out with the single intent of getting Cole’s attention. 

The air in her room went dense and he popped into view moving quickly to her, his silvery blue eye’s filled with worry and his floppy hat bouncing.

“Passion what’s wrong? You're hurting?” Cole stared at her worriedly.

She laid a shaky hand on his arm “thank you for coming... I need to talk to you.. It’s very important and would help me”

Cole frowned in confusion “alright.. If it will help you..”

She nodded then took a deep breath as her nerves started to get jittery with unease. She just hoped this too didn’t end up in a disaster like the night she danced and started all this nug shit.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A whole lot of angst and headbutting!!
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy.

With a trembling smile she stepped back sliding one hand down his arm to lead him to the chairs sitting back in front of the hearth. She moved the chairs to face each other before gently pushing him into one. With sudden nervous energy she poured two cups of hot tea setting one on the table beside Cole, then she went and curled up in her chair, legs tucked under. She stared into the fire for a moment trying to collect her thoughts.

“Before I start I beg you to let me talk, let me finish what I have to say before you speak… please” she turned her tortured brown eyes to his, he simply nodded but questions lurked in his silvery blue eyes.

Taking a deep breath her hands clutched around the hot tea cup, she jumped into it “First off I want to apologize for the night I danced, You went out of your way to help me and I returned your kindness with uncontrolled ...lust.. uh ..passions..whatever it was ....” she held up one hand when she saw his mouth start to open.

“You did not deserve that Cole.. I was out of control and I knew what could happen.. would happen because of how edgy I was... but I was so greedy, I coerced your offer of help…. I knowingly let my judgment get clouded by my own nature.” she took a shuddering breath, she could not force herself to look at him right now. She set the cup aside her hands were shaking too much to hold it. 

“I’m not going to lie to you, had you allowed it I would have unleashed all my pent up passions on you and that was no better than the erotic thoughts Iron Bull was having about me.. Except he would not have forced them on me.. I would have had no such qualms about taking you willing or unwilling.” now she took a quick look at him but could not read his face at all. “and I think that disturbs me the most.”

Her heart felt close to shattering in her chest as she hung her head in shame “Please.. Try to find it in your heart to forgive me.. Someday.. If you can.. because I know I’ll never forgive myself.”

Gulping softly she tried to shake off the hurt and pain “Varric told me there are rumors that you’ve been temperamental and angry.. I know that it’s my fault and I’m so ashamed of myself for taking what you are, what you offer to others and trying to corrupt it...you... I don’t even know if I can offer a deep enough apology for the wrongs I’ve done to you Compassion…. I’ll understand if you can not find it in you to forgive me.”

 

They sat in silence for a few minutes before she finally gathered the courage to look up at him. She felt very much like a small kitten being watched by a hawk, so intense was the storm in his eye’s that for the first time ever she was genuinely frightened of him. Taking a shallow breath her body shifted from pure instinctual need to get ready to flee.

“cole… are you alright?” her eyes drifted down to see him gripping the arms of the chair so tight his knuckles were whiter than the snow outside on her balcony.

His stormy eyes narrowed at her and his mind slammed into hers with a single desired request.

She blinked blushing “Oh I’m so sorry.. Yes.. Yes you can talk.” 

He pounced on her so quickly she didn’t even have time to scream as his hands jerked her out of the chair and lifted her to face him. His eyes ripped through her as easily as the dagger’s strapped to his back would. The cold fury in his eye’s shook her so badly, her mind stumbled over any thoughts left there.

“Why?” his voice was a razor's edge.

“w..w..why..what?” she was almost too terrified to breath, she’d never seen him like this before.

“Why are you sorry?” he fairly hissed at her.

She was confused and it showed on her expressive face “Because I hurt you.. I promised you that I would never hurt anyone in Skyhold.. I broke that promise.”

He growled at her almost baring his teeth, his hands tightened on her shoulders shaking her. “Why did you break your promise?”

Her head shook violently “I don’t know Cole.. I..”

“LIAR..tell me” he shook her snapping his teeth in her face.

“I tried to take advantage of your kindness…” her heart was racing.

“No.. try again..” he gave her another shake.

Her eyes widened “truthfully I don’t know… I don’t understand what you want me to say!”.

He snarled at her dragging her closer until their noses touched and his floppy hat smacked her in the head, she could see the swirling silver and blues in his anger filled eyes.

“you do know and you're going to tell me” he whispered the words with a coldness that made her soul shudder.

Her heart and head were both racing like panicked horses, she was so shocked by his actions that she felt helpless. But the primal bitch that lay sleeping deep inside reared her head, then she roared her challenge.

Sondra’s eyes narrowed slowly and the brown eyes that usually looked upon him warmly turned molten “Go to the Maker.. I’m not telling you anything if I don’t know the answer!”

The coldest, iciest smile she’d ever seen curled his lips but his words shocked her “what’s the matter? You think I’m too naive now?”

“or maybe I’m so sweet and kind you don’t want to climb me like a harlot anymore… or my lack of understanding boundaries makes me stupid..” his voice was as cold as his eyes.

He leaned in closer his lips almost brushing her ear as he whispered “or do you not want to caress my face? What’s the matter Passion.. a sweet little kitten got your tongue?”

Her eyes opened wider as his words sank in, not even the tickle of his breath on her skin could distract her “you were in the garden…”

His lips brushed along her ear “yes”.

“you were listening in on my conversation?” she went perfectly still.

His lips brushed along her ear again “yes”.

“so I just humiliated myself like a fool..when you already knew I was beating myself up about that night” her voice came out wooden.

Cole opened his mouth then shut it, rearing back to look at her “What?”

“am I done humiliating myself for you? because if so I’d really like for you to leave now” she stared a hole into his tunic, every emotion inside her was leashed tightly.

Cole grabbed her face and tilted it back until she looked at him “Passion.. Never would I ask you to humiliate yourself, for any reason.”

“truly? then why all this… because I don’t need your help to humiliate myself” her voice was a soft whisper, she twisted her head pulling away from him.

“Truly… I’m sorry.. you saw me as some kind of naive fool and it.. made me mad..” he sighed tiredly.

“Cole..” she wrapped her arms around her waist.

“Yes” he tilted his head to hide under his hat.

“What mask are you wearing now?” she shifted trying to see under the brim of his hat.

“I don’t even know…” his stepped back from her.

“Passion..” his hands started fidgeting.

“yes” her voice was a timid whisper.

“Why did you burn the dance costume?” his voice was now as soft as her’s.

“because it reminded me of your eyes, and the way you’d looked at me after I made a fool out of myself that night.” the pain reflected in her voice.

“I did not think you were a fool… I thought you were…” his voice broke.

She looked at him to see his eyes “what?..besides a selfish nug’s ass.” 

His eyes locked on hers and instead of words he showed her. He let her into his mind and showed her how he’d seen her that night, the passion the fire and ice of her, the feelings she had called forth from him and how badly it had actually scared him. He’d never felt desire before until she’d danced solely for him, offered him all her desires and passions. Offered to him all that she was and all she ever would be.

Her was low and soft with awe “you really see me like that?”

“yes” his voice dropped.

“why did you pull away from me then?” she stepped closer to him.

“You scared me, you alone saw past the mask and into the heart of me..” his body shuddered gently.

“oh..well i scared myself if that helps” she looked into his eyes and let him see into the heart of her.

“i’m not naive.. and i’m not unaffected.. by you..” his gaze refused to let her go.

“oh..” she swallowed nervously.

“i’m just better at hiding it then Iron Bull..” he stepped into her space forcing her to look up at him.

“ummm I… don’t know.. what to say..” she tugged on a lock of hair nervously.

“so the Spirit of Passion.. speechless..” he gave her a sweet lopsided grin.

“you can never tell Varric.. I’d never live it down.. and well my reputation would suffer.. and uhhhh” her eyes got big as his hand covered her mouth.

“Sondra… your rambling..want me to help you with that problem?” he gave her an innocent look.

Confused she nodded slowly against his hand but this close to him she saw his eyes reflect a whole new storm in their depths, his arms moved like the dagger strikes he was known for, wrapping around her waist, pulling her into him and his head dropped, her lips the prize he finally claimed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay was under the weather for a few days.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I'm a sappy romantic..   
> Our little spirit has a temper and some people find this funny as hell.

Chapter 12:

He claimed her lips like a dying man claimed life giving water. Her soft whimper called to something slumbering inside his soul, his hands tightened her waist forcing her body to arch into him. Her hands slid into his white blonde hair knocking his hat to the floor. When his tongue slipped past her parted lips an inferno erupted deep inside Sondra’s belly. Panting she forced her head back to look at him.

“cole.. “ her voice held a sensual purr to it.

His stormy eyes slipped to half lidded, he growled softly his fingers digging into her back, he started to pull her closer to him.

“compassion.. This may be too fast for you..us” her hand went from his hair to his cheek as she pulled her head back, her thumb softly caressing his lower lip.

His eyes darkened, as his lips opened so he could bite her thumb, her body melted against his with a soft sigh. The fire he was building inside her over rode her caution, Cole moved so fast it made her almost dizzy, his arms swept her up against his chest as he moved to her bed and carried her to the middle, as he let her body slide down his, he captured her mouth once more drinking her in like a fine wine. 

He lowered her back to the bed as he covered her, his hands sliding to lock fingers with hers, their lips consuming and exploring. Her heart pounded against her ribs like the drums he’d played that night, his lungs ached for air but he refused to let go of her soft lips long enough to ease the ache. Finally she shifted pulling her lips away to explore the side of his cheek, jawline, and neck where she gave him a teasing love bite that made him groan. 

“Cole.. Why have you played the fool for these people?” her voice whispered in his ear.

He nuzzled her hair “When it started I wasn’t playing.. But between their faith in me and your nature it made me more then I was”.

“oh.. um should I even ask how many times you’ve spied on me?” she rubbed her face against him.

“probably not.. but you're fun to spy on.. especially when you're bouncing on your bed like a little girl..” he murmured brushing his lips along her jaw.

She giggled “well now I’ll keep that in mind..”

Cole reared back suddenly like a wild horse caught in a rope then he was simply gone. Sondra sat up confused and worried, she fell back on the bed. Gnawing her lower lip, she stared at the canopy above her head, she turned her head to gaze at the bed longingly, hoping against hope this wasn’t some bizarre dream she conjured. But if it wasn’t, was she prepared to face the feelings that came with loving another person?

It took awhile but she finally put it together that the Inquisitor had summoned a group and left, part of the group of course was Cole. The Inquisitor usually took Cole when he needed the unique abilities of Cole being able to feel pain and strong emotions in area’s other’s could not feel. On top of Cole being extremely sneaky, he could almost see how people had died, or what they suffered before dying. It was a gift that helped the Inquisition out almost as much as Leliana’s spy net work.

But with a lighter heart than before it wasn’t but a couple of days before she was back entertaining the people who stayed behind and getting herself into trouble. Her happiness spilled back over into her voice and her need to see people around her as happy as she was. So she campaigned to get Blackwall and Josephine together, easier said then done. 

She’d been minding her own business heading for the library upstairs to look for a book of poetry, when she had overheard the Fake Dragon gossiping with some guards woman she didn’t know. 

“I sincerely hope that the Inquisitor’s demon pet falls in battle and does not return to Skyhold.” her voice was haughty and grating.

“Aye M’lady.. That thing gives me the right creeps it do..” the unknown guard spoke.

“That creepy little monster needs to be bound to someone powerful enough to keep it out of trouble.” the cultured tones held a lot of malice.

Sondra stood there for several minutes before hearing a particularly nasty wish placed upon Cole’s head that sent her passionate temper racing to the forefront.

She marched up to the Lady and snarled “You’re a two faced hypocritical WHORE.. How dare you speak about Cole like that.. He’s generous and helpful.. YOU are not a lady YOU ARE A PARASITE!”

The female guard tried to step in and Sondra turned her rage upon the hapless woman “You shut your mouth before I turn you into a toad and feed you to the birds bitch” the rage she barely held in check sent the guard running.

Lady Vivienne scoffed flipping her hand “Shoo begone you little piece of tavern trash, you do yourself no justice in championing that misplaced demon”

The rage took hold as Sondra’s spine snapped straight as one of Bianca’s bolts. Turning she looked into Vivienne’s gloating face. 

“What did you call him?” then she hauled off and slapped that bitch right in the mouth, with a closed fist.

Lady Vivienne found out the hard way her ice magic didn’t work so well against a pissed off fire mage. It took Iron Bull, Dorian and Sera to pry the angry redhead off Lady Vivienne, Sera wanted to let the fight go on, Bull was tempted to take bets, but only Dorian realized what this little tiff was going to result in. He’d heard the conversation as a panicked guard had yelled for help, it was his shields that kept Lady Vivienne from killing Sondra with an enchanted blade. Iron Bull finally lifted Sondra tossing her over one shoulder and marched out with her screaming dire threats at Vivienne if that evil harpy ever said another vile thing against Cole. Dorien stayed behind to try and calm the very angry Enchanter down, and Sera just walked off snickering about Vivienne getting her arse handed.

Bull didn’t stop until he was at the tavern and sat the vibrating redhead down on a chair. “Nothing like a pissed off redhead to liven up Skyhold” his laugh brought a tiny smile to her face.

Then it hit her and she slapped her hands over her face “Ohhhhh Bull what have I done!”

Bull pushed a tankard over to her “You just knocked the nug shit, out of the Mistress of a Duke, girl you got some big horns”.

The Charger’s all looked at her “WHAT!!!!”

Sondra rubbed her temples in slow circles “I’m so dead..”

“Horn’s up little girl, Me and the Charger’s got your back” Bull hit the table so hard it groaned.

A hand slipped onto her shoulder “And I too have your back as well, Kitten” 

She reached and took Fenris’s hand in gratitude “thank you..all of you”

Her gut was saying she’d landed in deep dragon shit, with no shovel to get out with this time.

She sat with the Bull and his Charger’s for as long as she could, Fenris sitting close and glaring at anyone male who tried to talk to her. She was so caught up in her own fears she didn’t even notice anyone outside the table. Krem took it upon himself to switch her drinks from ale to tea, she absently smiled at him then went back to staring at her cup. Bull finally asked her what Lady Vivienne had said that sent her off in a fit of righteous fury. She told him and looked around puzzled as the entire table went silent. 

“Little girl are you sure Lady Vivienne said someone should bind Cole?” he watched her intently.

She nodded swiftly “Yes.. the guards woman who got Dorien was there when she said it..”

She observed the look that passed between Bull and Krem “Why? what am I missing?”

Bull shook his horned head “Let me look into this.. if it’s what I think.. I’ll send Krem to talk to you.. you ok with that?”

“Yes.. why wouldn’t I be?” she looked between the two men in confusion.

“Because you're a lady.. and ladies tend to be a little weird about men coming to their rooms.. alone..” Fenris pointed that out blandly.

She was tired and worried sick about what was going to happen so she shook her head in frustration “I still don’t get it!.. Krem’s not a stranger.. he’s a friend!”.

Fenris tapped her nose and she growled at him “Their showing you all the respect reserved for high class women like Lady Vivienne.. just say thank you Kitten..”

Sondra turned and smiled beautifully at Bull and Krem “Thank you.. Kitten”

Fenris sighed and rubbed his face, the Charger’s started laughing like maniacs and Bull cheered heartily. Sondra smiled shaking her head and feeling better than she had for several hours now, she was very thankful for the friends she’d made here.

When she retired to her room that evening, she listened as a heavy chain was put in place on the outside of her door, her stomach dropped as she listened to her freedom die a screaming death and she completely understood why Iron Bull had said he’d send Krem to talk to her, he’d known she’d be put under room confinement and not thrown in the dungeons. Someone had obviously taken precautions against her being tossed into the cold dungeons, she wasn’t sure who but she’d need to thank them if she lived . Turning she quietly sat before the hearth, wondering if she should pack her stuff before the Inquisitor come home and kicked her out, she prayed to whatever god or goddess that would listen, that the man simply kicked her out and didn’t kill her for assaulting one of his inner council.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \----EROTICA WARNING----
> 
>  
> 
> Ok I finally give you Erotica.. I refuse to call it smut.. if you don't like erotica please skip this chapter or Just skip to the last few paragraphs and sentences.
> 
> Otherwise,  
> Enjoy.

Sondra slept soundly in the middle of the big bed, she was even more grateful, they hadn’t thrown her into the dungeon and allowed her to simply be locked in her room, it had been snowing heavily for about week since she got put on room confinement. Sophia and Fenris were allowed to visit, mainly because no one wanted to tell Fenris’s sword no. Krem came by three days later and began filling her in on what Iron Bull was looking into, Varric made almost daily trips to visit and sit with her, as did Lady Josephine to whom she offered her deepest gratitude after finding out she was the reason Sondra wasn’t in the dungeons. She was brought food and drink regularly but even with all that she was going insane being locked in like she was. She sent prayers to every god and goddess she could think of that she didn’t go insane from boredom and that Cole didn’t work himself into a frenzy, when he got home trying to fix the acts of her temper.

Cole popped into the room and leaned against one of the bed’s post watching her sleep. He’d not even made through the gates of Skyhold before he came to her, his silver blue eyes drank her in as his hands started releasing the buckles of his leather coat and the belt that held his daggers securely to his back. He stripped down to his light tunic and leggings before slipping into the bed with her, all he wanted was to hold her and feel her warmth pressed against his skin. Wanted to know that the night they’d kiss hadn’t been a fluke, that it was as real as he remembered. He’d done nothing but think about her and wonder what she was doing while he was gone guarding the Inquisitors back.

Cole moved closer careful to shift the blankets as little as possible as his long lanky form settled in next to her, she was facing him and her wild riot of flame colored hair stood out against the creaminess of the sheets. Tentatively he reached out to touch a lock of hair laying across her cheek, his nimble fingers took in the silky texture as he rolled the long curl between his fingers before gently tucking it behind her ear, he felt his heart thud against his ribs and was awed at the power she held over him even while she slept. He rested his head on her pillow their noses almost bumping as his hand feathered against her cheek, she smiled in her sleep and leaned into the caress of his palm. His body froze as his name whispered from her lips, he’d never felt a sensation like the ones she evoked in him. 

His fingertips danced across her cheek to the curve of her lips, she murmured softly against them, he wanted to study everything that was her. He went still as she shifted and slid an arm around his waist burrowing closer to his chest a soft mewling sound deep in her throat. His body clenched and he fought the urge to drag her against him and bury his face into her soft inviting neck. He settled for tilting her face up and kissing his way from her forehead to her soft lips. As his lips claimed hers, her hand tightened in the fabric of his tunic, she arched gently her body seeking his touch like a kitten arching against a palm.

Her sleepy brown eyes opened, her soft gasp of his name slipped into his mouth as he slid his tongue past her lips, needing to invade her anyway he could. Her hands scrambled to clutch him to her, nails raking his chest caused him to shudder with pleasure he never imagined. His hands slipped into the depths of her hair anchoring her head so he could deepen the kiss, he needed and craved all the contact she could offer. She arched into him with a sensual roll of her body that made him groan. Her hands were already yanking his tunic up, pulling back she forced it over his head almost tearing it in her haste.

Cole pulled back his eye’s stormy and mercurial, he finally moved his arms helping her remove his tunic and watching her delicate hands glide against his skin. She felt the shudder that rolled through his body and purred, lifting her head up she licked his collar bone and nipped playfully, needing his response like the land craved rain. Cole moved so fast she squeaked, he straddled her hips pinning her hands on either side of her flushed face. Her eyes devoured him turning into melted chocolate, from the white blonde shag of his hair to the sensual storm rolling through his eyes, to the long muscular length of his bare torso, her blood turned to fire inside her.

“your beautiful..” her voice was a caress.

“only you see me..” he leaned over rubbing his nose against hers.

“I’ll always see you Cole…” she moved her head to kiss him but he evaded her.

“no one else seeing me matters… so long as you see me” Cole kissed her then and he put everything he was into it.

Her heart lurched painfully as she felt his soul in that kiss, so she gave back to him the only way she knew how. She pulled her hands free of his and wrapped her arms around his neck forcing him down into the hunger of her kiss. Shifting her feet, she let him sink in between her legs and the feel of his long wiry body pinning hers almost caused her to combust, she settled for arching into him. Cole was almost panting as she welcomed him into her essence, for all his ability to kill without remorse, he wasn’t sure how to handle the feelings this redheaded tempest was making him feel. He shifted his head kissing along her jaw line until he got to the sensitive spot under her ear and nipped, she squirmed and whimpered at the same time. 

He feathered his lips against her ear “I want to see you…”

She swallowed, nodding shyly “ok..”

His sat back on his heels only then realizing how he was actually positioned, but his nerves stilled when she tried to move, hands fluttering trying to catch the hem of her long silky night gown he was currently kneeling on. He could see the flush tinting her skin and it amazed him that a creature as passionate such as she could feel shy. His hands clasped hers stilling their fluttering motions, she looked up at him timid and searching. 

He moved back lifting his knees and caught the long hem, he cocked his head pinning her with his eyes as his palms settled on the warm skin on the outsides of her legs. He watched the passion ignite in her eyes as his hands slide up to the back of her knees, as he moved the material along her legs he was enthralled at the play of emotions across her face, the way her chest heaved sucking in air. His hands stopped at the heated flesh of her hips, his lips curled as he watched her blush deepen but she lifted her hips so he could move the material up. He let his palms settle into the dip of her waist and the edges of her rib cage, his thumbs brushed the sides of her breast causing her to whimper in pleasure as her eyes rolled back. 

He was so engrossed with watching her reactions he couldn’t look away from her face. He pulled her up so he could lift the gown completely away from her. As he tossed the silk away he caught her frantic motions as she tried to cover her body shyly. 

“no” his voice was firm and rough.

She froze dropping her head and letting her hair cover her body instead, Cole’s hands cupped her face forcing her to look up at him. That was when he saw the pain inside her mind, she was ashamed of the other scars on her body. One’s besides the single one that encircled her neck, not many but enough to make her feel self conscious. Cole’s thumb gently caressed one cheek, his eyes never leaving hers. 

“you are everything that’s beautiful.. Fire.. Passion.. Heat.. Life.. a few scars will ever make me think otherwise.” His eyes were tender.

He laid her back against the pillows wearing nothing but her long flaming hair and a pink blush on her skin. His hands smoothed along her torso worshiping and memorizing the texture, he kept waiting to wake up and this all be a dream. The deep thrumming sound she made in throat finally woke the primal side of his nature, he stopped worrying so much about being human and opened himself up to feel her passions slip into his mind like a sensual dance. The dangerous edge of his assassin’s nature merged with her fiery temptress, his hands grasped and arched her body so he could taste her skin. She grabbed his waist and sunk her nails into his cool skin, he leaned in and trailed his tongue along the sensitive skin between her breast. 

She ignited like a firestorm in his arms, her insecurities died under the crashing wave of heat and desire, Cole’s mind caught the backlash of her wanton demands and the predator in him responded with growl. She wrapped long legs around his hips as her arms snaked up to pull him down to her, Cole kissed her roughly as she arched into his bare chest, her burning skin branding him, marking him. He wrapped his arms around her waist and rocked back on his heels, legs spread, as she tightened her legs around his waist clinging to him, fingers gripping his shaggy hair, his lips devoured her. He slid one hand from her hip to her back, the other he tangled in the cascade of heavy hair and pulled until she arched. 

Cole’s lips tortured her from the curve of her throat down her collarbone, until he reach the swell of her breast. Her hands dropped back to brace against his leather clad thighs, nails digging and kneading into the muscles as he rubbed his face against the mounds of soft flesh. He inhaled catching the scent that was all her, it made him think of cinnamon and fire. She was writhing in his arms by the time he teased his way across her breast and when he suckled, she cried out so loud it startled him, only the crashing waves of desire rolling out of her and into him let him know it wasn’t pain it was pure pleasure. He was so lost in suckling her breasts and listening to her moans and the play of her nails on his thighs he almost missed the sound of the chain being removed off her door.

Cole lifted his head to glare at the offending door, moving swiftly he popped out causing Sondra to drop back to the bed panting and confused. Trembling from the build up of lust crashing through her body she dragged the bed sheets around her and took long controlled breaths. That’s when she heard the voices outside her door. Jumping up she almost tripped trying to get to the door to open it, placing one hand on the edge, she peered around seeing Cole squared off against Commander Cullen, Seeker Cassandra and the Inquisitor.

The first two were glaring daggers at Cole but the third simply glanced past them at Sondra herself, cheeks flaming she offered him a sheepish smile. 

“Inquisitor may I have a moment to get dressed please?” she barely kept her voice from trembling.

“Of course M’lady, please let me know when you're ready.” He bowed at her pulling back the Commander and the Seeker.

“Thank you Sir” she reached out and laid a gentle hand on Cole’s arm.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \----EROTICA WARNING----  
> Another half chapter with some Erotica.. oh yes and Cliffhanger!!!!
> 
> Enjoy!

Cole spun swiftly blocking Sondra from the eyes of those in the hall, he herded her back inside and shoved the door shut with a violence that even scared her. Sondra moved away from him, the passionate rage rolling off him was frightening, and kind of thrilling at the same time. She watched him warily as he paced her room. He paced in front of the fireplace, his hands clenching and unclenching as he moved. Well at least he had a taste of how she felt the night she’d danced, for some reason that thought made her ashamed, she would never wish those emotions on him.

Quickly she moved to start getting dressed, still a little shy about being naked around someone she tried to hold the sheet around her body while wrestling with her shift. Hands grabbed the under garment and pulled it away as an arm snaked around her waist, jerking her back flush with his chest and legs. She gasped startled by how fast he was, her heart slammed into her chest as his hands and arms tightened around her lifting her, he half dragged half carried her to stand before the large vanity mirror.

“uuummm Cole.. What.. What are you doing?” her voice came out breathless.

He set her on her feet gently, his silver blue eyes locked with hers in the mirror’s depths. His nimble hands gently forced hers to drop the sheets letting them puddle around her ankles, he captured both her wrists in one hand. His head tilted so his lips rested by her ear, his eyes never letting hers go in the depths of the mirror. She felt her body flush, standing in front of the large mirror she couldn’t hide her nakedness, or how vulnerable she felt.

“I told you.. You're beautiful in my eyes.. So I’m showing you how I see you…” his voice was a silky purr in her ear.

Her body shivered from the warmth, but she whimpered when his hands so adept at taking a life, kept her wrists captured against her stomach, the other slid up her ribs to cup her breast. His long fingers plucked and teased the sensitive peak until her legs almost buckled. His breath was ragged by the time his hands slid down to her waist digging in as his eyes devoured her in the mirror. Her blood was like lava simmering under her skin, her lungs couldn’t barely drag the air they needed in and her hands now free had moved to his waist. His hands caressed and sought answers over her skin and she watched as those long fingers that could twirl his favored daggers with deadly grace danced over her skin with passion that no one outside of herself would have thought him possible of. No one understood it took as much cold passion to murder someone as it did to make love to them. 

“for a man so shy and sweet when I first meet him.. your really very amorous....” she rested her head back on his shoulder panting softly.

Cole bit her on the shoulder “Dorian has a large library.. And Varric has interesting novels.. But Bull has lots of experience….”

Her head snapped up “WHAT!”.

He lifted his head gazing down at her guileless innocence “did I do wrong.. I was trying to help..”

She shrieked and twisted in his arms “you better be kidding Cole or so help me I’m going to set your cute ass on fire!!!”

He batted his lashes tucking his head to gaze soulfully from under his bangs “did I do it wrong?”

She went still, her heart dropping into her stomach “cole.. Please .. Please be joking”

His head snapped up at the hurt he felt in her, his arms wrapped around her “I’m sorry ..I was teasing..”

Her arms coiled around him shivering “I don’t like that mask..”

“I’m sorry Passion..” his lips feathered along her jaw and cheek “so you really think I have a cute ass?”

She almost choked on a laugh “your so adorable.. Yes I do think you have a cute ass.. But my favorite thing..” 

She pulled back cupping his cheeks with her hands and staring into his eyes “Is your eyes.. I can see forever in their depths.. I see the man you are.... I see all of what is you in your eyes..”

Cole stared silently into her eyes for a moment, his hands resting on her hips he squeezed gently “Get dressed their getting restless.”

She blinked and it was like he’d never been in her room, his daggers, hat, leather tunic, undershirt, everything was gone she was standing there alone and the cold seeped into her skin like an icy harbinger. She shivered as she got dressed, working her long hair into a cascading waterfall down her back she looked once more into the mirror a tiny smile curling her lips as she imagined Cole behind her. Shaking her head and taking a deep breath she turned towards her door with determination.

The Inquisitor came in to speak with her, allowing only the Seeker to accompany him. They sat behind closed doors for hours, Sondra telling them everything that had happened, and showing them the reports from Iron Bull, and Dorian, as well. When Inquisitor Nicademus and Seeker Cassandra left both looked grim faced. As he moved away he sent a messenger for his Spymaster, Diplomat and a few other people. Seeker Cassandra waited until they were alone before laying a hand on his armored wrist.

“What are you going to do Nicademus?” her voice was rough velvet and tinted with concerned.

His grey eyes looked at her “Whatever I have to.”

She nodded “I know you will… but is it the right choice?”

He ran a hand over his face “I hope so.”

It wasn’t until late evening when a closed judgment session was called. The only ones allowed to be in attendance besides the Inquisitors Inner Council, where Dorian, Varric, Iron Bull, Solas, Sophia Hawke, and Fenris. Lady Vivienne and Sondra were separated across the room from each other. Absent from this meeting was Sera, Blackwall, and Cole. Guards were posted in formation down the walls and at the doors and the Inquisitor sat on his throne hands laced before him, grey eyes taking in everyone.

“I’ve heard of the complaints.. Been informed of what took place while I was away.“ His gazed shifted between both women.

“I can not fathom how two ladies such as yourselves could act so juvenile inside MY fortress. I hope for your sakes you had good reasons for such inappropriate behavior.”  
He shifted back dropping his hands on the thrones arm rests.

Sondra was distracted by the absence of Cole, half wishing he was here but then worried about him being here at the same time. She cursed herself for not warning him ahead of time about what she’d done, but now was too late to fix that mistake.

“I want that tavern reared piece of trashed dealt with Inquisitor, she assaulted me and slandered my name.” Lady Vivienne stood with haughty grace, her eyes glaring daggers at the redhead.

A bemused look crossed the Inquisitor’s face “Really now Lady Vivienne, how would you consider it dealt with?” 

He raised one hand stalling her “One moment Lady Vivienne”.

He turned and looked at Sondra “Do you feel as Lady Vivienne does?”

“No M’lord Inquisitor.. I lost my temper yes, but she was no innocent damsel.” Sondra bowed her head.

He turned back to Lady Vivienne with a questioning arch of one brow “what would you have me do?”

 

A cold calculating look crossed Lady Vivienne’s face “I want her to pay for her actions with her life.”

Sophia Hawke barely got her arms around Fenris, his snarl could be heard over the voices raised in shock. Dorian had to lay hands on Varric and Bull growled something nasty about Vivienne’s heritage and nugs. Solas watched the room with narrowed eyes. Even the Inner Council was taken back by the venom in Lady Vivienne’s tone. The Inquisitor raised his hand, grey eyes glaring around the room until people settled down. 

He turned his gaze to Sondra “M’lady do you have anything to say?”

Sondra smiled softly “Yes M’lord I do, she wishes my death for slandering her good name.. and punching her.. Setting her robes on fire..” her smile said she was anything but contrite. 

“So what should her punishment be for malicious gossiping, slandering, and wishing a fellow member of your personnel guard dead or bound to her magic? Isn’t that considered treason? Oh I do believe that is punishable by death” Sondra turned big wide eyes to the Inquisitor.

Lady Vivienne scoffed waving one bejeweled hand “Silly child I never said any such a thing”

“Really Lady Vivienne?” Commander Cullen stepped forward pulling a very scared older woman with him. Lady Vivienne frowned as she recognized the older guard who usually patrolled by her rooms.

The Inquisitor turned and looked at the older woman who was nervously wringing her hands “What say you Mistress?”

“My Lord Inquisitor?” the guard swallowed fearfully.

“Did Lady Vivienne wish harm to one of my personal guards with the intent to use blood magic for binding, within your hearing?” his voice was gentle but deadly at the same time.

The guard paled and nodded “yes.. Yes my lord…”

All eyes turned towards Lady Vivienne some accusing, some angry. She lifted her head like a queen and glared at the poor cowering guardswoman. “You are no more innocent then I dear and so if I fall so shall you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully Chapters 13 and 14 will hold you all over for awhile, I will be out of town for a week in a place with no WiFi.. I know I know it's a scary thought... But I promise to be back by the 12th and I will have more chapters to offer..
> 
> Have a lovely weekend Everyone!!!


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry here's the rest of the Cliff Hanger!!! Our little spirit is getting feistier. Gruesome details folks so be warned.  
> Character Death Warning...
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy!

Commander Cullen arched one blonde brow “That is not so, Guardswoman Telia came forward willingly and admitted to her lack of decorum. Her punishment has already been decided. Also she did not wish anything malicious she merely stated a fact felt by a lot of people in Skyhold.”

Lady Vivienne’s cool mask slipped as she hissed turning her fury towards Sondra “You little whore..” 

Sondra stared back at the woman “Now now, that’s not nice and it's slander.. I’m still a virgin… Can you say the same?”

Vivienne snapped hurtling a magic bolt towards Sondra, only to have it blocked by a protective barrier cast by Solas. The hatred swirling off the dark skinned mage was almost tangible.

“I’ll see you and that damn demon both dead…” magic started swirling around the white robed mage like a living entity.

“I don’t think so..” Sondra glared back defiantly. 

The Templer’s lead by Commander Cullen hit Lady Vivienne with Smite, she screamed and writhed twisting like a leaf caught in a violent wind storm. As she snapped back on a silent scream the very air around her cracked and split like flesh bursting on a roast held too long over an open spit. The air took on a tainted burnt smell that made those closest gag, it was so pungent that it caused eyes to water. The sickening sounds of flesh ripping and blood spattering the walls and floors made it hard to focus on what was happening. The desire demon laughed wildly as it looked around it’s heavy lidded gaze landing on Sondra. She stepped out of the bloody mess that had once been a powerful enchantress, like she was stepping out of a dress. But the sound of shattering glass accompanied by the thick green smoke was even more confusing, when it cleared the demon gone and Sondra was on the floor in a heap.

“Ohhhh my, my pretty one.. You're more clever than I thought.. How did you know?” the demon purred slinking closer. 

Sondra started to reply and it hit her like a slap in the face, no one else was here and they were in a sickly green tinted world that shimmered and wavered. She was alone facing a demon strong enough to break the will of a Grand Enchanter, she wasn’t nearly as powerful as Lady Vivienne had been. 

 

“Welcome to my playground doll…” the demon giggled, causing the chains dangling from her breast to clink and jingle. 

Sondra pulled her magic close, letting it flow and coil around her like a living creature, it hissed and crackled like a serpent, that was coiled ready to strike. She fought panic, and tried to keep her face from showing her fear, what kind of magic had this demon managed to use to pull them both into the Fade, and why hadn’t Commander Cullen and the Templer’s stopped it. She took heart, when she watched the demon take a step back, it eyed her warily.

It lifted placating hands “I wish to bargain..”

“For what demon?” brown eyes narrowed.

“I want the spirit boy…” the she demon purred.

“What?” Sondra was confused as to why a demon would want Cole.

The demon’s slitted eyes rolled back as it’s hands slide over its own body like a perverted lovers, it moaned in pleasure licking its lips “Allllllll that pure innocence, uncorrupted, untainted…. He’d keep me feed for a very, very long time…” the creature slide its fingers in between it’s own legs. 

Sondra fought back the mounting rage “You do know he’s an assassin right?.. Not so very innocent..”

The horned head tilted grinning at her “Oh you are as naive and innocent as he is.. How cute..” it’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully “Maybe I’ll take you both.. Or maybe I’ll just take you and then I can do all kinds of interesting things to the little spirit pet.. Mmmm yeeeesssss I think I’d like that…”

“You keep your nasty vile hands off him!!” the pissed off redhead was losing her grip.

The demon giggled girlishly “Ohhhh what’s the matter pretty one, you got dibs on the sweet little spirit boy?”

“His name is COLE.. and you can’t have him Bitch..” the air around her was heating causing the tips of her hair to start moving.

“Ohhhhh my… someone’s getting pissy.. whats the matter sugar..don’t want to share?” the demon smirked licking her fingers and trailing them down her abdomen sensually.

“As a matter of fact.. No.. I will never share him..” she was almost panting with the fury of her rage now.

“ohhhhh the jealous type… well no matter.. I’ll just kill you and take your skin” the demon’s eyes narrowed.

The demon pounced and screamed as Sondra’s magic struck the heat so strong it blistered the corrupted skin on the demon's hands and arms. The vortex of fire swirled off her body like an army of angry snakes hissing and snapping, the demon might have been able to shrug off a little fire, but it was no match against the maelstrom that was unleashed by an very angry mage, the rage was so powerful it caused Sondra’s eyes to leak fire.

“You will not touch him you corrupted whore.. “ she let loose with everything she had, and in her righteous passion she took pleasure in the dying screams of the demon. As the flames blazing with the force of an inferno whipped and whirled, incinerating everything around her.

She lifted her head the power rolling off her caused her long hair to dance in the heated air as lesser demons lurking on the side lines cowered. Some of the weaker ones ran away quickly, not willing to face the wrath of an angry firestorm.

“YOU WILL LEAVE HIM ALONE” she screamed her challenge uncaring who or what heard her. 

One brave envy demon slithered closer “Oh and why is that”

It shrank back fearfully as she turned her intense gaze to it “Because if you don’t I’ll come back to the Fade and destroy everything I can…..”

It hissed at her “You can’t…”

She stalked over to it and snarled “Would you like to test that out?”

A thundering roar caused the air of the Fade to tremble in terror and all the demons brought into the area by the fight, including the envy demon, scattered like nug’s faced with an apex predator.

Sondra froze like a tiny nug herself, her heart slammed into her ribs so hard it hurt. Her magic retreated as her fear canceled it out like a soaking wet blanket. She lifted her head and heard the whipping sound of wings ripping through the air. She felt him coming and she knew fear, the air around her dropped the temperature from hot and molten to frigid and icy. She heard the crunching of stone in this murky landscape, the bite of nails on rock made her stomach heave. The sound of it’s breathing made her knees buckle so she hit the ground painfully. Her body shook with terror, but she couldn’t resist the desire to see the creature that was going to destroy her. She was panting harshly by the time she got her body to obey, crouching on her knees in tainted grass she finally lifted her head and opened her eyes. 

She woke up in the middle of the great hall screaming as Solas and Sophia held her, sobbing she buried her face into the familiar warmth of Sophia’s neck clutching the other woman in terror. From the shadows silvery blue eyes watched her. But the rest of the people moved in blocking his view, other people's hands gently patted and offered comfort to the young woman sobbing on the floor. Lady Vivienne’s discarded body had already been removed by the time Sondra woke up from being pulled into the Fade. Solas finally had to put Sondra to sleep, he was worried at what she could have seen in the Fade that would pull a primitive reaction that intense for a Spirit. Fenris walked over and simply picked her up, and snarled that he and his wife would stay with her and anyone else, but Solas, could pretty much fuck off. Fenris meet the silver blue gaze of the worried spirit, and Cole knew the warrior would not keep him from Sondra’s side.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \----EROTICA WARNING----
> 
> Plot and Erotica in one chapter...
> 
> Enjoy

Sondra was trapped in a nightmare, the ground shook from the force of silver tipped nails hitting the ground, she fell painfully to her hands and knees as the wind from it’s wings buffeted her. Panting and whimpering she turned her head frantically trying to find a safe place to run. The chill radiating off its glittering hide caused her to slow sluggishly as she scrambled on the ground, nails ripping grooves into the dirt. She felt something flip her over onto her back with enough force to drive the air from her lungs in a painful whoosh. Fearfully she looked up barely noticing the gleaming white scales, the serpentine curve of its long neck, the tilt of its massive head as one icy blue eye watched her, trapped between it’s massive clawed front feet like a tiny nug trapped by a great cat. It lifted it’s huge horned head and roared, she screamed in complete terror.

Rough hands shook her harshly, as soft lips pressed against her ear “wake up.. Please wake up..” 

Screams slipped away into whimpers, as his soft voice reached her and coaxed her back into the waking world. Panting wildly and frantic her hands clutched at his leather coat, she lurched trying desperately to crawl inside the safety of his arms and body. He slipped his arms under her legs and around her waist then he lifted her against his chest, moving with care he used his legs to pull them to the side of the bed before standing. Careful steps took them to the chairs before the fireplace that glowed softly, he sat in one chair keeping her trembling body close as he stroked her back murmuring soft words in her ear.

“I can feel your pain.. Let me help..” his breath gently ruffled her hair.

“I don’t know how…” her voice came out strained and broken.

One calloused hand move to tilt her face up, his worried gaze caught and held her fearful one. His thumb absently stroke her lower lip as he tried to read her pain, he felt the shudder that wracked her body and tightened the arm around her waist. Taking a deep breath, she tried to relax, feeling his mind dance along the edge of her soul, gently questioning, softly asking for permission. She opened up and let him in, trusting his gentle compassion and she knew he’d never hurt her, not her Cole.

He embraced her pain and traveled along its pathways, he looked at it through her eyes and saw nothing. His eyes widened in shock as he saw the nothingness, it was like her memories where covered in a thick blanket. He caught a glimpse of the Desire demon, felt the rush of heat and heard the dying screams. He even heard some of what the demon had said to Sondra, but after she screamed her verbal challenge it was like her mind shut down and there was nothing but murkiness and shadows. Cole felt something else just before her mind pushed away from the nightmare, it was faint but there and he couldn’t catch the thread.

He felt guilty, he’d tried to follow her into the Fade, but he couldn’t get to her. What ever the demon had done had kept him from following. He meet up with Solas both of them desperately trying to find Sondra in the tainted landscape before she attracted more demons. It was the power of her rage that had help them locate her, but something incredibly powerful hit them both, sending them out of the Fade and back into the waking world. He decided he’d need to tell Solas about this later, that was the only person he knew who traveled the fade and might be able to unravel this mystery.

He placed his lips against her temple letting the brim of his floppy hat hide them both under its shadow.

“I can help you forget…” he pulled back to look down at her.

Sondra frowned softly before hesitantly shaking her head “No, I’m scared I’ll admit that. But I don’t want to forget… I don’t know why but I just know I need to remember this.”

Cole gazed into her eyes looking for something, before nodding slowly “Alright..”

“So you attacked the High Enchantress Mistress of a Duke?” there was a smile in his voice.

She groaned dropping her head against his shoulder “let me guess you were the last to know?”

“Uh huh… what did she do to make you so angry?” his lips curled softly.

Sondra groaned against his leather coat “She … she kept calling you a demon.. And then she wished you dead…. Then she said something about binding you…” she sighed into the leather “I lost it.. I was so mad I just went off on her and I punched her in the face…”

Cole shifted his head to gaze at the side of her face “you defended me?”

“yes” she whispered, suddenly shy and nervous and unsure of why.

He brought one hand up to brush his knuckles along her cheek and chin “thank you Passion…. You really are my champion. "

Her head lifted and the fire storm in her eyes took his breath away “I will always defend you Cole.. Against anyone or anything…” 

He smiled softly he didn’t know what to say to that so he hugged her to him, letting his arms enjoy the feel of her soft body. She kissed his jaw and buried her face into his neck melting against him. He felt her body go languid when she slipped into sleep, he knew she needed the rest so he held her in his lap and watched the fire dance in the hearth, his hands idly stroking and soothing her. He finally decided to carry her back to bed, settling her into the middle of it, he quickly stripped down to his leggings. His nimble fingers hesitated on the laces, he wanted desperately to hold her without the barrier of clothing, but he didn’t want to wake her and ask if it would be alright. Finally he unlaced his leggings and slide them down his legs, he draped them over the edge of the bed incase he needed them quickly. 

His gazed went to the door and he stalked over throwing the bar in place and locking it, he then went to the balcony windows and locked them and pulled the blinds shut. Satisfied he went back to the bed and stood there for a moment gazing down at the most amazing creature he’d ever meet. As his eyes roamed over her face something haunted slipped through the silvery blue depths. Something else clawed at the back of his mind but Cole shook his head and gritted his teeth, pushing it away and locking it out. He didn’t want anything to intrude on his time with her, not the Inquisition, not the Fade, not his fears of being Bound he just wanted to spend time with Sondra, feeling her fiery passion melt the coldness inside. In her arms he could forget what mask he was wearing and just be himself, because she saw him, almost too well into all of him.

Climbing onto the bed he pulled the covers up over them, and then he snuggled into her. His face buried into her hair as his arms caged her back to his chest, he shuddered in pleasure when she sighed and wiggled closer. His eyes closed as his mind drifted off the feel of her warmth lulling him into a gentle cloud of contentment. Her hand sought his even in sleep and linked their fingers together in a tender gesture of trust. 

Sondra came awake with a languid stretch of muscles and a soft sigh, she stilled when she realized she wasn’t alone in the bed. Turning her head she gazed at Cole’s relaxed face, and almost giggled when she saw his floppy hat sitting haphazardly on his head. She moved carefully not wanting to disturb him as she rolled to face him, gently she lifted his hat and moved it out of the way, a soft tender smile curling her lips. Putting her elbow down she propped her head on one hand as her gaze moved over him, taking in the sleeping relaxation of his face, the softly tousled hair, the pale bare chest, and the soft downy hair at his navel that disappeared below the sheets. 

Her mouth dropped open in shock as it dawned on her that the sheets were pushed down low on his lean hips, and there were no leggings covering the smooth flesh. Her stomach shuddered with pure desire and that sensitive spot between her legs clenched painfully enough she had to stifle a moan, she felt the liquid heat pool low and the desire to touch him gripped her like a living beast. The soft cotton night dress she wore felt like burlap against her suddenly sensitive skin, but she ignored it to devour him with her eyes.

Throwing caution to the wind she gave into the demanding urge to touch him, slowly she moved closer sliding down further so her face was level with his ribs, she shifted the sheets gently trying not to wake him. The sheets pooled along his hips playfully taunting her, but she left them for the moment. Her fingers trembling she traced the path of his sternum, only letting her fingers spread as she reached his navel, feeling the cool silk of his skin beckoning her closer, so she went willingly into temptations arms and placed feathery kisses along his taut stomach. The need to nuzzle his flesh over rode caution, she rubbed her face against his skin inhaling and enthralled by the feel of him. She moved to crouch between his legs, hands resting on his smooth hips as she leaned in and nuzzled the skin of his stomach like a greedy kitten, she could taste the unique essence that was Cole, he tasted like fresh fallen snow on her tongue, his skin smelled like the crisp air on a cold morning. She couldn't stop herself even if she'd wanted to now, the lure of him was too powerful to ignore.

So engrossed in learning the feel of his skin she let her weight down on his thighs and felt the naked length of him pressed into the flesh of her abdomen. The feel of him turned her on like nothing she ever imagined, knowing that she awoke that in him was a powerful aphrodisiac. She wiggled down so she could nip playfully at his hip, sliding sensually along his legs causing his hips to arch up into her soft cotton covered flesh, she shifted putting her weight onto her left arm as she slide her right hand up his thigh, her eyes traveled over his exposed body and manhood like a sensual caress. She was almost panting with need, and the ache between her thighs was painful.

Her hand slid up the hard length of him, she uttered a soft sigh of pleasure at the velvety feel, it enthralled her that everything about him was beautiful. Her nails lightly scoured his shaft, causing his hips to buck, she purred in response and licked him from base to tip. She didn't even realize she was rubbing herself against him, she was so caught up in the heat of the moment. The primal growl got her eyes on his face as she looked up from between his legs, the ice storm she saw in his eyes promised things that made the heat of her core wet.

She dropped a soft licking kiss on the skin next to his shaft “good morning..”

The hands fisted into her hair weren’t too gently as she was tugged up the length of his body, something about the look in his eyes and the feel of his hands in her hair caused her to whimper in need. The way he pulled her up left her straddling his waist and her night dress hiked up around her hips, he pulled her face down to his, eyes locked and flipped her onto her back so quickly she never felt his muscles coil. He kissed her with so much unleashed passion she moaned into his mouth, hips arching to rub against him hungering and greedy. She barely registered the sound of tearing cloth, but her body was so inflamed with desire and lust she just didn’t care. His shifting hips tortured her dampness as his hardness nuzzled and caressed, she moved her legs to clasp him with her thighs, the heel of her feet braced on the backs of his calves. He growled against her throat and bit down, just enough to make her cry out and arch up into him, his hands clamped down on her rolling hips. 

He lifted his head to nip her ear “do you want this… do you want me?”

She arched her neck uttering a soulful whimper “yes..yes cole..pl..please..”

Her nails dug furrows into his back, her panting, sexy whimpers sang in his ear, but it was the way she lit up in his arms like a living flame that turned him on the most. It took all he had to bring his arms up and brace himself above her. 

“look at me..” his body stilled.

She looked up at him unfocused and pleading “…cole?’

“I want you to see me.. And only me. “ his voice demanded her attention.

She nodded her head frantically “you're all I want to see".

With a predatory smile his slide inside of her, her eyes snapped wide just before she arched into him with the force of a bucking horse, the scream that broke from her throat almost sent him over the edge with her. It was the pure shock of burying himself inside of a woman for the first time that kept him from following her into bliss, he knew her body was warm but inside like this she was molten silk. Her pleasure finally broke through his control and slammed into him like a raging druffulo. The convulsive rippling of her inner walls tore through him, shattering his control, his hips bucked against her until he answered her cry of passion. As she milked him dry, her body twisted and arched sensually soft little breathy moans filled the air.

He dropped his head into her neck shaking like a leaf, he was panting harshly against her skin. Her arms tenderly wrapped around him offering him the solace of her warm body to rest against, he took her offer with a tender kiss against her throat. He shifted to the side to melt onto the bed pulling her body close to his.

“is it always that quick?” he looked adorably tousled.

She giggled “umm I’m not sure… I’ve never umm done this before..”

“oh.. Me either” he stared at her in a daze.

She gazed at him tenderly “you're amazing… you know that right?”

He looked down shyly “no I’m not..”

“well you are to me..” she placed a soft kiss to his forehead.

“passion..” his voice was soft.

“hmmm?” she was so boneless, her eyes had closed.

“nothing..” he burrowed against her, resting his head against her breasts, listening to the rhythm of her heartbeat. He wondered when she was going to finally realize he never slept, he didn’t feel like telling her right now.

She yawned and slipped her fingers into his hair, gently caressing his scalp. She drifted back to sleep content and safe in his embrace.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \----EROTICA WARNING----
> 
> More dealings with the nightmare and emotions.
> 
> Enjoy!!

She was running away from something, something massive and scary. The landscape kept shifting and bucking against her attempts to flee, she scramble up a hill only to have the land twist and shift sending her rolling back down to the base. Her heart was hammering so hard against her ribs it hurt, but she knew she had to get away before he found her. Turning from the hills that wouldn’t let her climb them she sprinted for the tree’s hoping they might shield her from his sight. Panting she found the largest tree she could and pressed her back against it, her lungs were starting to burn. The she heard him, his roar made the tree’s and ground tremble, she ran like a panicked animal seeking refugee. The snapping and breaking of wood were the only warning she got as she pitched forward, the wind knocked out of her as she rolled onto her back gasping for air.

Tears ran down the sides of her face as the dragon crouched over her, one massively clawed foot spread around her body effectively caging her. Its breath when it leaned down to study her was like the icy winds whipping over Skyhold during a blizzard. She shuddered as its foot came down on her body, not crushing but firmly pinning her. Her clothing stuck to her body in a clammy sweat, she almost screamed when she felt it’s scaled nose brush against her inhaling her scent. Her hands clenched into fists and her eyes clamped shut, in her heart she knew the dragon was going to tear her apart. One silver tipped claw nudged her arm, she panicked her eyes snapped open as her head turned going face to face with the dragon. She went still completely transfixed gazing into the huge orb of one cold blue eye, so close was the beasts face she could see her terrified reflection. 

What she wasn’t expecting to see was the pain that lurked in the beast's eye, something in it’s sadness eased her fear. Sondra wondered if she was going completely insane, her fear stilled and was overcome with a need to sooth the great monsters hurt. Slowly, timidly she reached out and laid her hand on it’s scaled jaw. The cold of it’s scales chilled her fingers but the soft rumble from deep in it’s chest made her want to cry for him.

“what do you want from me?” she whispered.

She awoke with a start, looking around frantically before gentle hands clasped her face. Silvery blue eyes gazed into her questioningly, she threw her arms around Coles neck and pushed closer to him for safety. 

“I had a bad dream…” she suddenly felt silly.

Cole laid his cheek against her hair “want me to make it go away?”

“no.. it’s fine.. You’re here that helps" she nuzzled his neck tenderly.

Cole closed his eyes feeling her start to drift back to sleep, he cradled her against his body carefully. 

The next time she woke up it was without nightmares, stretching she realized her night dress was laying on her pillows, torn from neckline to hem. She lifted it as she sat up, a silly grin curling her lips as she thought about it. Glancing around the room she noticed the fire going, a tray of food, and no Cole. Feeling her stomach grumble she climbed off the bed and went to find one of her silk night gowns, donning that she added a fluffy robe and curled into a chair before the fire digging into the food. Soft knocking at her door stop her day dream about her and Cole’s first time, but it didn’t wipe the silly smile off her face.

“Come in” Sondra glanced over her shoulder.

“Hey Sweetness how you feeling?” Sophia walked into the room trailed by Fenris. 

Sondra jumped up and ran to them hugging both, before leading them to chairs. She opted to sit on the hearth rug with a hot cup of tea.

“I’m good thank you… um how long have I been sleeping?” she peered at Sophia sheepishly.

Sophia laughs softly “about a day and half sweetness..”

“oh my goodness..” she blinked in shock.

“No worries Kitten, you needed it after that display in the Throne room” Fenris gifted her with one of his rare smiles.

“Soooo Sondra .. What's Cole to you? Hmmm” Sophia poured herself a cup tea.

Fenris pinned her with a look “I’d say lover.. Am I right Kitten?”

Sondra’s face went up in flames “Uh.. Ummmmm…” she got a goofy smile on her lips as her eyes took on a far away glaze.

Sophia’s eyes widened as she watched the younger girls face “oh by the Maker.. Not just Lover.. More like Beloved..”

Fenris frowned and looked back at his wife “How can you tell?”

Sophia rolled her eyes “Because that’s the same besotted look I got on my face when I realized I was in love with you.”

Sondra went still, her heart thrummed gently in her chest “I do…”

“Do what?” both of them turned to look at her.

“I love Cole..” her smile lit up her face.

Sophia smiled tenderly at Sondra “I’m happy for you sweetheart….it’s about time some young man swept you off your feet”.

“If you need someone to talk to you know you can always come to me right?” Sophia looked at the younger girl warmly.

Sondra got up and hugged the woman “I do know and thank you..”

Fenris growled softly “If he hurts you I’ll kill him”

Sondra laughed softly “You always say that!!”.

Hours later Fenris pulled his wife up “Come we need to retire to our room.. And Kitten needs to rest” 

As Sophia stepped out in the hallway, Sondra laid a hand on Fenris’s arm “Brother… how does one tame a wolf?”

Fenris looked at the girl he thought of as a little sister and playfully tapped her nose “You don’t Tame a wild beast, you handle it carefully and always remember it will never truly be tame..”

Sondra blinked in confusion “umm that’s not helpful..”

Sophia leaned around her husband “Do not Tame him … Love him.. Be his sanity when he needs it.. His sanctuary .. Be his…. be there for him always.”

Fenris hauled his nosy wife down the hall, making her giggle wildly with threats of tossing her cute little blonde ass over his shoulder.

Sondra closed her bedroom door going over what Sophia had said, it was a puzzle she wanted to figure out. 

She went back to stand before the flames dancing in the hearth, the rhythm and sound sank into her blood and without knowing it she started swaying in rhythm with the flames. Eyes half closed she moved loose limbed and fluid, the song she heard was the heartbeat of the fire inside the hearth. The robe she’d been wearing slipped from her arms down to the stones of the floor, she stepped up on the ridge of the warm hearthstones and danced, slowly sensually weaving letting the song of the fire tell her body the motions it wanted from her. During one of the turns she spotted him leaning against the door to the balcony, floppy hat tilted down to hide his face. She almost stopped dancing but didn’t, instead she faced him and danced for only him. This time the passion she showed wouldn't send him running, reaching up she slid the thin straps of her night dress down her shoulders, letting the silky material slither down her body to pool at her feet, the light of the fire playing over her skin like she wanted his hands to do.

Fire tempted ice and he came towards her sitting down in one of the chairs, face still hidden by his hat. She put every ounce of her heart into every turn of her wrist, roll of hips, motion of her head, the way she let her hair cover her body as she danced for him, she gave him everything in her soul and slowly sank to the ground at his feet panting softly, the sweat shimmering on her skin as her forehead rested on his knee. 

Slowly she lifted her head seeking his eyes, her soft panting breaths the only sound besides the fire. He reached down and dragged her into his lap, his lips claiming her’s with a fierceness that left her yearning for more.

Deep inside she suddenly understood what Sophia had meant about not taming him, but being there for him body and soul. The rest of Skyhold might be blinded by the mask he wore, she was not and she saw the killer that lurked underneath the calm surface he showed the rest of them. The way his mouth possessed her, she knew, he’d protect her and kill for her, but she’d never, ever tame him. 

Grasping his hair she opened her mouth, silently telling him she was his in every way he wanted her. Cole growled, his hands roaming over her skin, feeling the dampness, the heated flush of her flesh. Releasing her lips he leaned back gazing at her, she blinked up at him a soft smile touching her lips. Cole’s hand slipped around her throat gently, then slid up to grasp her chin, his eyes bore into her like icy daggers. 

“mine.. all mine” the possessiveness in his voice sent shivers through her.

“yes all yours” she whispered the words.

Cole’s eyes darkened as he shifted her body draping her across his lap so that her head settled against his shoulder, he tucked one of her arms behind him the other he placed on his leather clad leg. His free hand caressed her face trailing along her jaw tenderly, fingers traveled down along her throat to dance along her collarbone. He traced designs over the soft swells of her breast as she arched up for him. He palmed her breast feeling the peak pebble into his palm, his eyes remained on her face watching the flush of desire set her skin glowing, he tugged and rolled her nipple between his long fingers, he enjoyed the sounds of her quickening breaths and throaty purrs as she kneaded his leg. 

He moved the arm behind her to brace her shoulders as she arched up whimpering his fingers torturing her softly. His hand moved to the quivering flesh of her belly, enjoying the soft silky skin and the tremors that caused it to ripple under his palm. Playfully he dipped one finger into her navel causing her to suck her stomach in and give a breathy laugh. Her laugh turned into a whimper of pleasure as he moved his hand down to run it up the inside of her thigh, he watched her eyes roll back in her head as his fingers finally caressed the soft folds of her heat. The dampness there coated his fingers like honey, the more he teased and caressed the more intrigued he became by her sultry moans. 

It took all his self control to not rip the lacings of his leggings open and bury himself deep into her soft willing body. Biting his lip he continued caressing her slipping his fingers in and out of the velvet folds, before seeking the tiny nub and tugging it. She bucked against his hand with a throaty cry, the arm behind her clutched her keeping her from falling off his lap. Opening his mind to her he listened to her wants and needs and slide a finger deep into her heat, his eyes almost rolled back in his head as her inner walls clenched his finger. His fingers slipped and slid over and into her wet heat moving faster and then slowing down making her writhe, leaning in he bit her neck growling softly against her damp skin until he felt her body and mind reach the edge of her passions.

“look at me” his tone was steel.

Panting and wiggling in his lap she opened her eyes. Her hands clamped tightly in the leathers he was wearing.

“i want to watch you....” his gaze devoured her face.

“cole..oh maker..please..” she whimpered.

His hand cupped her core, caressing stroking the silky wet folds while she cried out with need. Plunging two fingers into her his thumb rubbed the nub of her sex, she arched and screamed when her body exploded around his fingers, his eyes captured every expression that crossed her face, the widening of her eyes the arching of her hips as she bucked against his hand in total abandonment. He didn’t stop the motion of his hand until she completely melted into his lap, satiated and boneless. He ran his tongue along the side of her neck tasting the salty sweetness of her skin. 

“you're beautiful..” his voice was shaky

Panting she turned her head her lips brushing his before she nipped his lower lip “only for you”

Shifting her body she felt the hardness of his arousal against her backside, she pulled herself up to straddle his hips her hands moving to the laces of his leggings. Her hands were shaking as she unlaced him and pulled the leather pants open, he lifted his hips so she could pull them down and free the hard length of him. Looking at him she watched his eyes darken as she caressed him loving the feel of tight skin, she used her hand to worship the full hard length of his manhood, nails lightly scouring. She hesitated before shifting to raise on her knees over him, fevered brown eyes gazed at him uncertainly, his hands gripped her hips as he nodded, she leaned in and kissed him with greedy hunger, before guiding him between her legs. Slowly she sat down on him, feeling the hard thickness of him filling her, she whimpered wantonly. He rolled his hips sinking into her, he rocked and she arched, it was a sensual dance that had them both panting in rhythm. 

He braced his feet so he could his legs to thrust into her faster, the sound she made in her throat almost shattered his control. He found the perfect rhythm and thrust into her, he arched his head back groaning at the pleasure that coursed through his body as her slick walls clenched his shaft. She gasped arching her back until her long hair danced over his legs adding to the sensual assault of his body, her hands clasped around his wrists as she pushed back against his motion. But it was the way she screamed his name as she found her release again that sent him over the edge, her name a roar as he spent himself deep into her body.

She melted against him panting and quivering as he wrapped his arms around her sweat slicked body, pulling her up to cradle in his lap. She moaned softly as her inner walls spasmed from the force of her release, he turned his head to look at her. She kissed him softly, tenderly as her body started to relaxe.

“cole” her voice was soft.

“yes” he gazed at her, seeing the amazement in her eyes.

“i think that's how its actually supposed to be” she grinned at him.

“it’ll help if we practice..” he kept a straight face.

She laughed burying her face against his neck “i love you”.

She felt him stiffen right before she yelped, her ass hitting the cushion of the chair.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More emotional turmoil because love just isn't easy!
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy!

“NUG SHIT….” she snarled letting her head fall against the chair’s back.

Why did she always say things or do things that caused him to run like a spooked horse? For the first time she started doubting herself, honestly wondering if her coming here had been a good idea at all. It seemed that since she’d come here she’d caused Bull trouble with her very nature, Varric was always coming to her rescue, Lady Vivienne had died and now all she did was scare Cole. Sighing tiredly she got up and went to the wash basin and cleaned herself. Slipping her gown back on she went and sat on the edge of her bed. 

The nervous emotions running wild in her made it so she got back up and walked over to the doors of the balcony, resting her forehead against the cool glass she lifted one hand to trail a fingertip across the misted panel. She tortured herself trying to come up with an idea to fix this, but she just couldn’t see a way to do so. Her heart hurt so bad, she felt the tears slip down her face but she didn’t even have the energy to wipe them away.

She felt the pressure in the room change, knew it meant he’d come back. “Cole.. you can’t just vanish whenever I say something that spooks you..” she pulled away from the balcony door.

When he didn’t respond to her, she looked up and around, confused until she finally saw him standing against a far wall cloaked in shadows. 

“Cole?” she didn’t move afraid he’d run again.

“Was it true?” his voice was low.

“Was what true?” she shook her head in confusion.

“when you said you loved me?” his voice dropped lower.

With a frustrated groan Sondra stalked over to him, her hurt feelings and chaotic mind getting away from her again.

Poking him in the chest with one finger “YES.. do you think I’m so easy, I go around telling every spirit of compassion I run into that I love them!!!” 

She spun in an attempt to put space between them, but his hand snapped out gripping her arm and jerking her back, she yelped and stumbled crashing into his chest. Shock caused her to look up into his eyes and freeze. He looked every bit the assassin, eye’s cold and unforgiving, lips pressed into a chilling line. 

Angry at him and herself, just tired of hurting she planted her hands against his chest and pushed “Cole if you don’t want me fine just say so… I’m not going to apologize for falling in love with you... and if that scares your delicate assassin ego .. well too nug shit bad..”

Cole arched one brow “you have a potty mouth”.

“What?” her jaw dropped.

He used one finger to lift her jaw, closing her gaping lips “I left because your words shook me.. The fact you see past my masks unnerved me.. the way you melt in my arms .. the way you look at me and make me feel things I never knew I could feel.. it spooks me..”

His hand moved to grip her jaw firmly and gently, his face lowered and his voice was cold “I stepped away to think.. to try and understand… but don’t ever doubt that your mine…”

Her gaze settled on his face and she believed him “well I am passion.. not wisdom...i won’t always choose my words or actions wisely..”

He rested his forehead against hers “do you think we'll ever get this right?”

“I don’t know.. but it will never be dull..” she smiled softly.

“well aren’t we just a fine pair” he muttered the words she’d spoken so long ago.

“no more vanishing.. please..” one of her hands raised to caress his cheek.

“I can’t promise that sometimes the Inquisitors pull is too strong and I might not be able to warn you.” he nuzzled her palm.

“fair enough..but I don’t have to like it.” she lifted her eyes to gaze at him.

“I’m such a softy with you.. I can’t even stay a little mad at you” she shook her head giving him a rueful smile.

“it’s because you like my backside..” he tried for the innocent face.

She looked thoughtful for a second then reached around and pinched his butt “yeah that must be why!”  
He rocked his head smacking her with the brim of his hat. She laughed at him and pinched his cute butt again “you're asking for trouble..”

“Uh huh and just what are you going to do about it?” his head started tilting again, causing the brim of his hat to flop towards her.

She grabbed his hat and tossed it to a nearby chair “that's what I’m going to do!!”

“your so mean to my hat..” he shook his head letting his shaggy hair swing.

He watched her brown eyes soften for him and pulled her into his arms. Kissing her deeply feeling her forgiveness as she wrapped her arms around his neck, lacing her fingers into his hair. He lifted her into his arms and carried her to the bed, he turned and fell back causing her to giggle as they bounced. Which then turned into a wrestling match of her pulling his clothes off. 

"When did have time to lace your leathers?" she laughed tugging at the laces.

"on your balcony.." He smirked up at her.

"you were on my balcony???.. while I was in here feeling bad for myself.." she attacked him trying to find a ticklish spot.

He run his fingers over her stomach and she squealed like a little girl. She scampered back trying to evade his tickling fingers. He rolled grabbing her leg and pulled her back to him, the silk gown she wore made it easy for him to pull her across the bedding, she was laughing to hard to put up much of a fight as he moved to lay on top of her. He grinned down at her proudly as he got the upper hand.

"I win!" he smirked.

She smiled wickedly, squirming slowly under him "uh huh...you're sure about that?."

His eyes darkened as his blood heated, in seconds they were a tangle of heated flesh and hands, mouths and bodies sliding against one another. The sounds of desire, cries of passion, whimpers of need filled the room until she finally passed out from exhaustion.

She fell asleep settled between his legs, his leaned back into the headboard as she rested against him, her lower back against his bent leg, long hair cloaking them both as her soft breaths tickled his skin, her face tucked into his shoulder. As she started shifting in her sleep his quick hands reached around her and pulled her up closer, then nestled her against his chest. No matter where he shifted her, one delicate hand always seemed to move to rest against his chest, he was curious about the action. He liked holding her like this, she was everything soft and tender, it made him feel special, more real.

 

Hours later she lay curled into his side like a contented cat, head tucked into his neck, arm resting along his stomach her hand resting on his chest, one leg bent and laying over his. The feel of her warmth was comforting to him, the easy way she showed her feelings to him like she had nothing to hide, that kind of worried him. He was finding it harder to keep the mask in place, and he didn’t feel comfortable letting others see him for who and what he was. Outside of the woman in his arms only Varric and Solas had any idea that he wasn’t as naive and harmless as he pretended to be.

He was worried about what would happen in a few days when he traveled with the Inquisitor to Adamant. He knew he was traveling with the Inquisitor to the home of the Grey Wardens, but he had a sinking feeling that things were not going to go as smoothly as they all hoped it would. Nothing was ever as easy as people wished for it to be. He settled for running his hand up and down her arm, distractions were often times easier to handle then the worrisome thoughts collecting in his head.

She shifted against him, her hand opening to splay across his chest, soothing as if even in her sleep she knew he was worried about something. He used the arm he had under her to pull her closer, needing the feel of her to brush away the apprehension of doom invading him. She stretched languidly and turned her face to nuzzle his neck as she brought her hand up to caress his cheek.

“what’s wrong?” she murmured sleepily.

“nothing go back to sleep…” he stroked her shoulder.

“mmmm… you… sure?” her voice was whisper soft.

“mmmhmmm” he didn’t want to wake her up.

He frowned softly as she wiggled closer, he didn’t even know she could get that close, and laid her hand back on his chest.

“why do you do that?” he was curious.

“i like to feel you breath.. it feels like magic floating in the air…” she tilted her head looking at him through her lashes sleepily.

His smile was crooked with amusement “you see things like no one else..”

“it’s part of my charm…” she burrowed her face back into his neck.

“oh cole.. do you think we could finish the lecture you started.. you know the one in front of the mirror sometime?” she murmured this under his ear.

He almost bit his tongue when he realized what lecture she was talking about, and how swiftly his body responded to the visual image now burned into his mind's eye.

“uh huh sure..” he choked the words out.

She purred “good because just.. yum..”

His breathing was choppy as he felt her slip back to sleep, he wanted very much to wake her up and act out her fantasy right now. But he didn’t think that was how relationships worked so he’d wait for another day, because he had a few fantasies of his own.

“we don’t have to wait.. I can feel your desire..” she murmured softly.

“I thought you were sleeping.” his voice cracked.

“I was but your desire and emotion pulled me back..” she kissed his neck.

“I can wait until tonight.” he squeezed her warmly.

“ok.. gives me time to plan..” her voice trailed off.

He didn’t know if he should be worried by that or not, there was no telling what this woman could come up with between now and tonight.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fun light hearted chapter!
> 
> Enjoy!

She woke up slowly, hair tangled around her face and alone in the bed. She rolled onto her back yawning and stretching, wondering if she was ever going to get to wake up in his arms after the one time it happened. She wanted to get spoiled to waking up beside him, but until things settled down that probably wasn’t going to happen, not any time soon at least.

Then she remembered what she’d whispered to him at some point in the night and giggled like a young girl, wishing she’d been awake enough to see his face. Finally she motivated herself to get up, but only after thinking about him and the mirror a little bit longer. Groaning and laughing at the same time she realized all she’d actually managed to do was sexually frustrate herself. She thought about taking care of it but decided to use the pent up emotions later tonight on him.

Getting dressed she reflected on the fact that with him she was turning into a wanton hussy, not that he seemed to be put off by that fact. Sitting in front of the vanity mirror brushing her hair she got an idea, she wanted to get him something, anything that would not only mean something to him but also show him she cared about him deeply. She gnawed her lower lip trying to figure out what to get him. She’d never gotten someone a gift before, she’d seen men get flowers and jewelry for women, sometimes even intimate clothing, at least she’d gleaned that much from men who’d passed her on the streets thinking about the ladies that held their affections.

Tying her hair back quickly she jumped up and grabbed her cloak, she knew just the man to ask because he would have all the answers for her. She almost ran out her bedroom door before she realized she was barefooted, she quickly slipped her walking shoes on then sighed because she forgot stockings. She almost growled as she wrestled the stockings up and laced them, then slid her feet into the slippers she decided to wear. Then she bolted for the door grinning like a fool as she pulled it shut behind her, and stopped to look at the door that no longer held her captive, she smiled as she walked away.

She paced around the hearth waiting for the Inquisitor to finish talking to Varric, both men occasionally looking at her with bemused smiles. The Inquisitor looked at Varric questioningly and the dwarf simply shrugged he had no idea what was going through the girl's mind right now or why she was so agitated.

Stopping she looked at the tall dark haired man and smiled “Books.. the Seeker really likes books.”

“Huh.. your sure about this?” he smiled at her, because he couldn’t picture Cassandra being a reader.

“Yes, she has several… she reads them out loud sometimes.. Cole told me he’s heard her.” she smiled brightly.

“Well thank you M’lady.. I’ll have to look into this revelation closer..” he bowed to her before walking away.

“Alright what’s got your petticoats in a knot young lady?” Varric turned to stare at her, arms crossed over his chest and a smirk on his face.

She looked around before pulling a chair closer and sitting down, bent forward she almost whispered “I need to find a gift for Cole.”

He rubbed the back of his neck chuckling “So you’ve been here pacing, because you want to get the Kid a gift?”

She nodded, her eyes big and pleading “YES… sorry.. yes.. will you help me?”

He wagged a finger at her “Stop with the big eye’s… that's not playing fair young lady..”

“But you’ll help me right?.. please Varric..” she tilted her head perfecting the sad puppy look.

“Alright.. alright I’ll help you.. just stop looking at me like that..” he ruffled her hair playfully.

She squealed and clapped her hands like an excited child “You're the best!”.

He pulled a chair up and sat down “So what are you thinking of getting him?”

Her grin faded and her eyes got really big “I … i have no idea..”

“Huh… that's not very helpful..” Varric tap his chin thoughtfully.

She sighed nervously playing with a lock of hair, her gaze fixed on the flames in the hearth.

Varric tapped the table “I think this calls for a trip to the tavern.. maybe someone there could offer an idea.. you know for research purposes..”

She looked at him with a puzzled frown “how would they know what Cole likes? they barely pay any attention to him..”

Varric shook his head “Not so… Bull pays closer attention than people think.. besides we need a direction to work with.”

“Oh what devious plots are we hatching over here hmmmm?” Dorian leaned in almost giving Sondra a heart attack.

She grabbed her heart and mock glared at him “Sneaky Man.. are you sure you're not a rogue?”

His mustache twitched playfully “Maybe I was just trying to get closer to you Lass..”

She laughed and kissed his cheek since he was leaning over her shoulder “You're so adorable Dorian!”

“Saucy wench flattery will get you no where with me!” he tapped her nose playfully.

“It’s alright.. I know my heart will be broken by you.. You're far too pretty to fall for me” she laid one hand over her heart and the other against her forehead pretending to swoon.

He laughed and swatted her arm “Silly woman.. so why are you both being so secretive over here?”

She told him what her dilemma was and he nodded, playing with his mustache thoughtfully. Then his dark eyes snapped up to her cunning and wicked. 

“So are you and Cole an item?” his smile said he already knew the answer.

She opened her mouth then shut it “Well I guess so.. I mean .. ummm..”

“Dear girl don’t get flustered.. I’m not condemning nor prying.. I actually think it’s delightful..” he reached out and patted her arm.

Varric watched from his chair, fingers tapping on the table top as he rejected various gift ideas.

“Oh I didn’t think you were Dorian.. you're to sweet to do that.” she smiled warmly at him.

Dorian was a little taken back by her words “I’m not sweet.. I’m sarcastic and temperamental.”

"If that makes you feel better.." She gave him a saucy grin.

"Impertinent witch.." He tried to frown.

The two men started discussing idea's, it sounded like an insult contest at times. She let her mind wander, she tried to think of the things he had shown interest in. She didn't want to get him an animal, he was away too much. Jewelry wasn't his thing either, nor were cloths and hats, he would never replace the floppy hat he wore. She nibbled her lower lip while she thought, suddenly she jumped up.

"Dagna!" She turned and ran towards Undercroft.

The two men watched her run off, looked at each other, shrugged and started talking about Wicked Grace.

Sondra hurried into Undercroft and rushed up to the tiny dwarf woman.

"Dagna I need your help!" She was almost breathless.

Dagna eyed her with a puzzled smile "um ok, what's up?'.

" I need the most beautiful dagger you can create and enchant, within three days time. " she gazed pleadingly at the tiny alchemist.

"Oh is that all.." Dagna giggled softly.

Sondra's face fell "not possible is it."

"I didn't say that... I can do it..." She smiled up at redhead.

Sondra's heart lurched "you can...really!"

"Uh huh... Gimme colors.. Runes...anything special you want.. And quicker the better.." Dagna's eyes gleamed she loved a challenge.

Sondra bent down and whispered quickly in the dwarfs ear, Dagna nodded several times. 

"Yeah I can do that...it's going to cost you.." Dagna looked up at the lady.

Sondra gnawed her lower lip "how much?"

The petite dwarf rattled off a quote.

Sondra wanted to cry "I don't have that much..."

"Make it.. Put it on my bill." The male voice held authority.

Dagna smiled like a tiny sun "Yes Sir Inquisitor!" She hurried off to get started ideas already rushing through her mind.

Sondra spun around nervous like she'd never been before "Sir I can't pay you back I don't have that kind of coin!"

He smiled at her gently "you keep morale up, you helped flush out a demon, your fierce and loyal, plus you helped me in my courting of Seeker Cassandra...it's the least I can do."

Sondra smiled brightly "your courting the Seeker! Ohhhh I'm so happy for you.. She's an amazing woman!"

He laughed "well I know it.. So if I may be so nosy.. Who is the dagger for?"

"Cole" she smiled tenderly.

Nicademus nodded "good choice M'lady, Cole is the best rogue I have, in close quarter combat"

"May I ask why your commissioning a gift for him?" He gazed at the young woman.

Sondra grinned impishly "because I'm courting him".

Nicademus threw back his head and laughed. 

" Might I offer my best wishes" he gave her a quick hug before turning to go check the weapon stocks.

Sondra was almost floating with happiness as she left Undercroft and went back to find Varric. He was currently and hurriedly writing a new novel for his Swords and Shields saga. She didn't stay long, he was engrossed, so she wandered off.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really liked writing this Chapter.
> 
> Enjoy!

A day later Sondra walked into the rotunda looking for Solas. As normal the elven man was critically eyeing one of his murals, his fingers on his chin and a small frown on his face.

"what's wrong Solas?" she walked up and stared at the painting.

"the colors are not right..nor the brush strokes." He glanced sideways at the girl.

"I think it is beautiful... But I'm not an artist like you." She smiled at him, having become more comfortable around him since the mess with Lady Vivienne.

“This is true.. at least not with paints, but your art lays in a different area.. what brings you here?” he turned giving her his full attention.

She held a wooden box in her hands, about the size of a fresh baked loaf of bread. Smiling she offered him the box, he looked at it then at her with a slight frown.

“I found this and thought you might like it!..” she gnawed her lower lip.

Solas took the wood box slowly, his long fingers admired the grain of the wood, the gold clasp that held the lid shut. But baffled as to why she’d brought him a gift.

“I’m not used to receiving gifts.. to what do I owe this honor?” his face still held a look of wariness.

Sondra shrugged lightly “You helped me after the whole Lady Vivienne thing.. and your Cole’s friend so that makes you my friend.. and well it’s a thank you..”

From anyone else he might have thought it a trick or jest, but the little Spirit of Passion wasn’t like that. She did things sometimes rashly and out of spontaneity but never for malicious or cruel reason. So he opened the box and smiled, inside was nestled eight halla and fennec hair paint brushes, resting on ring velvet. The wood handles were made from the same wood as the box in which they rested and he could tell they were handmade elven brushes. Set below the brushes in the bottom was pigments for mixing colors with deeper or lighter hues.

“These are beautiful.. my deepest thanks Lady.. “ he smiled at the girl.

“You're very welcome Solas… thank you for helping me..” she grinned like a little kid.

He sat the box gently on his table before turning back to the girl, his arms crossing over his chest as his face became thoughtful.

“Cole tells me he can not track your time in the Fade against the Desire Demon, he only caught small fragments…” his keen eyes caught the shudder that ran over the girl and the way she stepped back wrapping her arms around her waist.

“Yes, it seems to be bothering him a lot…” she bite her lower lip, looking around at anything but the keen eyed elven mage.

“Sondra..” Solas shifted and watched her freeze like a halla.

“Huh..” she glanced at him ready to bolt, but she saw the concern in his eyes and stood still.

“I’d like to find out what happened, it would ease my mind and Cole’s as well..” he shamelessly used Cole, as he knew she wouldn’t try what he had in mind simply for him.

She rubbed her hands up and down her arms “What if I’m better off not knowing..”.

“It’s worrying Cole.. would you wish him to lose focus on the battlefield and risk injury because he was worried about you?” his voice hardened and chastised.

“NO.. of course I wouldn’t” hurt filled her eyes.

“Good then let me try something.. if only to ease his fears..” he smiled benignly and held out one hand to her.

She hesitantly took his offered hand, her stomach churning wildly, she had a bad feeling this wasn’t going to turn out well. He lead her to a side room with long couches to sit on, he sat her on one and then moved her to recline back on it. He patted her hand gently, her nervousness was rippling off her in ways even he could feel.

“Sondra breath slowly in and out.. calm down before Cole comes rushing in here thinking you're in trouble.” he quirked an eyebrow, he knew the Spirit wasn’t in Skyhold but he wasn’t above using his name to settle Sondra down.

She took several calming breaths “Oh sorry.. I’m not sure about this.”

“That’s why I’m going to be right there with you.. I’ll not let anything harm you.. this I promise.” he settled on the floor cross legged.

She frowned up at the ceiling “it’s not me I’m worried about..” she muttered that under her breath.

“What?” he glanced at her but she shook her head.

She heard him utter the incantations softly in the old tongue, she couldn’t understand the words themselves but the cadence and sounds of the language were beautiful almost like a softly spoken song. She tried to focus on the words but found sleep wrapping itself around her and taking her conscious thoughts. She blinked rapidly and shook her head, when she focused she was standing in roughly the same spot she’d faced off against the demon, only Solas was standing beside her now holding his staff and looking around.

“this is where she brought me..” she whispered wrapping her arms around her waist.

“Hmmm.. I’m not familiar with this spot.. it’s older than some of the ancient dream ruins I’ve studied…” Solas turned slowly taking in the landmarks and murky skyline.

“So you fought her.. right here.. yes?” he stepped back beside the girl.

“yes..” she mumbled.

“Then what happened?” he leaned on his staff watching her.

“Ummm an envy demon came up and spoke to me..” her hands started nervously rubbing her arms.

“I see.. did you kill that one too?” Solas cocked his head, narrow eyes watching her like a hawk.

“no.. it ran away..” her breathing started becoming erratic.

Solas frown in puzzlement, the spirit girl wasn’t that terrifying, not enough to make demons run “Why did it run?”.

Her head snapped up and looked past him one arm lifting to point at something “Because he came..”

Solas turned to look behind him and his eyes widened, lying as if asleep, behind some broken ruin walls was a dragon. He turned to move closer only to feel Sondra’s hand grasp his arm, she was shaking her head no. Solas pulled the girl with him, he’d never seen something like this in his travels, he’d seen cities that had become ruins by dragon attacks. But never had he seen a dragon resting placidly in the Fade like this.

“Solas I don’t think this is a good idea…” she clutched his arm whispering franticly.

“Shhh it seems to be asleep.. I just want to see it..” Solas’s eyes lit up taking in details of the silver white scales and the puffs of cold mist from it’s jaws.

“He..” she muttered eyes whipping around worriedly.

Solas stopped to look at her quizzically “How do you know it’s male?”.

She shook her head distractedly “I don’t know .. I just do. “

“Was the dragon here when the demon dragged you into the Fade?” Solas turned to face the girl grabbing her arms.

She looked at him warily “No.. he came after she died.. I told you that..”.

“Your sure?..think hard Sondra..it’s important..” Solas shook her gently.

“I swear Solas.. I screamed out of anger and he roared a little later.. I think.. something like that.. why?..” she shook her head pulling back from the elven man’s grasp, her head starting to hurt.

“Did you issue a challenge?” Solas’s voice was harsh.

“YES.. I did.. I was angry..” Sondra was squirming trying to get Solas to release her now.

“WHAT DID YOU DO GIRL!” Solas yelled at her.

“I don’t KNOW!!.. I didn’t mean too!!” She started crying now, between the dragon and Solas, she just wanted out of the Fade now.

The cold mist wrapped around them, about the time they both registered the throaty growl coming from above them. Solas looked to where the dragon had been resting, the spot was now empty. Sondra lifted her head and saw it standing behind Solas glaring down at them, there was no mistaking the anger in the dragons swirling blue eyes.

“uhhh Solas…” she whispered.

Solas turned, laying one arm in front of Sondra pushing her behind him, the dragon snarled and uncoiled, silver spine spikes lifting from along it’s back and around it’s elongated face. Thoughtfully the elven mage dropped his arm and stepped away from the girl. The dragon sat back watching the man with lips curled slightly off it’s massive teeth.

“Solas?.. what are you doing?” she moved to lay her hand on his arm, the dragon growled.

“Don’t move child.” Solas’s voice was calm.

She dropped her hand, wrapping her arms around her waist, her gaze locked on Solas “what’s going on? is he going to eat us?”.

Solas smirked his gaze never leaving the dragon “No I do not believe it is..”

“He” she automatically corrected the mage, the dragon turned it’s head to watch her.

Solas narrowed his eyes gazing from the Spirit of Passion to the big massive white and silver scaled dragon sitting and watching her intently. 

He lifted his hand out to her “Sondra come here”.

She looked at the mage in confusion but timidly reached out for his hand and taking a step forward, the dragon’s front foreleg slammed opened clawed into the ground, making them stumble back away from each other. She screamed and threw her hands up expecting the dragon to swipe her with it’s clawed foot. Solas watched impassively as the girl acted on her fears, but the dragon simply pulled it’s foot back watching her with a crestfallen look on it’s draconic face.

“Sondra!” he snapped at her.

“WHAT!” she yelled, her hands still covering her face.

“You're acting like a human… you're not.. you are a Spirit.... am I not right?” Solas was starting to get exasperated.

“Y..y...yes..” she sighed taking a deep breath.

“Then try acting like it and not a squeamish shem....” he pinned her with a look.

“I forget about my old self when I’m here now.. I look like I do in the waking world..” she dropped her hands to her skirts rubbing them.

“Now face the dragon and tell me what you see..” he leaned on his staff.

Sondra glanced at the mage before turning to gaze at the dragon who was sitting watching her intently again. She didn’t realize she was moving until she lifted her hand to touch the scaled foreleg that had only a little bit ago hit the ground with enough force to almost knock them on their asses. The creature’s massive head lowered until she could look into it’s blue gaze, she laid her hands on it’s jaw, a tear slipping down her face.

“What do you see?” Solas thumped his staff in impatience.

“Cold..tired.. lonely.. always hiding.. never seen but always feared.. hated.. blamed.. hunted.. I don’t see his sadness... I feel it....” she stroked his face gently.

“I’m sorry you’re hurting.. I think you're beautiful.. like snow capped mountains.. “ she laid her forehead against the side of the dragon’s jaw.

Solas watched them so avidly, he almost didn’t noticed the change in the air around the spirit and dragon, but he felt the dance of power “SONDRA!”

She lifted her head and blinked at Solas “Yes?”.

The dragon rolled it’s blue gaze toward the mage, it chuffed softly, carefully lifting it’s head from the woman. Wide nostrils tested the air, the scaled chest expanded and released a bellowing roar of challenge, as it reared back on hind legs wings snapping wide out.

Solas ran in and grabbed the dazed woman pulling her with him as they ran through the ruins, the smell of decay and charred flesh starting to perfume the air, something was coming, something very evil. 

Sondra sat up on the couch coughing and gagging the smell still clinging to her memories. Solas sat up from where he’d fallen over on the floor, thoughtfully gazing at the girl coughing across from him. Finally catching her breath she sat up and swung her legs around, hands pushing back her heavy hair to gaze at Solas.

“So did that help?” she played with a lock of hair.

“It was very enlightening indeed.” Solas got up and went to his desk sitting and pulling papers to him.

She got up and walked out by his desk “I think I’ll just go now…”.

He nodded, hands busy and head tilted over a book as one hand wrote notes in the old elven tongue.

She scurried from the room her hand sliding in a pocket of her cloak rolling a stone through her fingers, deciding to tuck this little adventure in the back of her mind she hurried to Undercroft with the runestone Dagna had asked for, that’s how she’d found the gift for Solas. Her excitement for the soon to be finished dagger overriding her worry about the Fade trip she’d taken with Solas. Dagna had sent her a note earlier that morning about the runestone and if she got it soon she could have the dagger ready for Sondra by evening meal time. Which would be perfect timing as Cole had left that morning to go check on something with the Inquisitor and Seeker Cassandra.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fun Chapter and kind of a girls night out as well.
> 
> Enjoy!

Sondra was ecstatic as she rushed from Undercroft back to her room with a wooden box inlaid with silver cradled in her arms. She knew she had half the day to prepare before Cole returned back to Skyhold, the group had been held up on their way home. Bandits had moved into an area killing families and attacking supply caravan’s along the roads. She’d received a message sent by carrier bird earlier, letting her know so she wouldn’t worry. Carefully she sat the box on her dresser, one hand gently caressing the wood grain a silly smile curling her lips. She wanted tonight to be perfect when she gave him this gift, suddenly nervous she started pacing her room one hand pressed to her stomach as she thought of different things to do tonight. 

She’d never gotten to work on her planned night, she’d fallen asleep and he’d been by the Inquisitor’s side as strategies were gone over in great detail. When he’d come back to the room he slipped into the bed and held her, she woke the next morning as he was getting ready to leave, she’d gotten a melting kiss and then he was simply gone. So now she wanted to work on the plans to make his welcome home one to remember, grabbing her heavy cloak she grinned because she knew just whom to speak too.

She hurried over to the Herald's Rest and scampered upstairs waving and smiling to various people who called out to her. She stopped before a door and knocked, waiting until she was told to come in. Smiling brightly she slipped into the room and hugged Sophia, looking around she noticed Fenris wasn’t lurking protectively around his wife.

“He’s down in the back of the courtyard training with Iron Bull and Krem..” Sophia laughed catching the younger woman’s searching gaze.

“Ohhhh good I need to talk to you..” she beamed, she honestly didn’t want Fenris here for this.

Sophia lead her to a couch and sat facing the girl “Oh sounds intriguing!”

Sondra took a depth breath “I want to welcome Cole home tonight.. but I want it to be special.. lovely.. “.

“Romantic?” Sophia’s blonde head cocked, she was grinning.

“YES.. sorry yes..” the redhead blushed pink.

“Ok sounds easily done, why are you so flustered?” she gazed at the girl befuddled.

Sondra’s hands fluttered “Well I’ve never done this before.. and I don’t know what to do honestly..”

“Well sweetness, not all men understand the romantic workings of a woman’s mind.. he may or may not even pay attention to all the time you put into this..” Sophia tapped her knee thoughtfully, actions like this were wasted on Fenris.

Sondra gazed at the blonde pensively “Don’t you do these kinds of things for Fennie?”.

Sophia laughed shaking her head “Not really love, he’s a passionate man his idea of romantic is throwing me over his shoulder and carrying me off to the bedroom..”.

Sondra saw the desire light up Sophia’s eyes and grinned “Huh, well Cole’s a little more romantic than that.. I think..”.

“Well it can’t hurt to try now can it..so where do we start?” she clapped her hands together gleefully.

Sondra got up and started pacing “I want it to be perfect.. soft candles.. scented air.. crackling hearth.. and I want to be beautiful for him…does that sound silly?” she turned to the other woman her eyes reflecting her worry.

Sophia stood taking Sondra’s hands in her’s “No Sweetheart that does not sound silly at all… It’s as romantically beautiful as you yourself are”

Sondra teared up and threw her arms around the taller woman “I’m so glad you're here!”

Sophia hugged the girl tenderly “As am I sweets..”

The women pulled back grinning sheepishly at each other then both of them stopped mouths agape before simultaneously yelling “JOSEPHINE!!!!”.

Half an hour later Sophia and Sondra were sitting across from the Ambassador explaining the redhead’s dilemma. Josephine listened intently, one finger tapping her lips as she got a thoughtful expression on her face. She lifted her scribe tablet and ruffled through some notes, making soft noises under her breath as she sat that down to dig into the drawers of her desk. With a triumphant squeal she pulled an inventory list out and waved it around.

“Ah HA.. I have an idea…” her dark eyes sparkled gleefully.

The other two women smiled and waited for her to go on with her explanation. She stood and came around the desk.

“If you ladies will convene to Lady Sondra’s room, I’m going to fetch a few things and meet you there if that's alright?” she smiled happily.

Sondra hugged the Lady gratefully “Yes! and thank you Lady Josephine..” 

Sondra and Sophia ran to the room, asking for a tray of hot tea and biscuits to be brought up while they waited. Stepping inside Sondra went to start picking stuff up and putting it away, Sophia walked around slowly with a critical eye, one hand on her waist, her mind running away like a wild animal.

“Huh.. how detailed are you willing to go for this night Sweets?” her voice was a thoughtful murmur.

Sondra looked over from where she was folding and putting away her clothes “Um I don’t know.. why do you ask..”

“Well you did state you wanted perfect right?” Sophia had a gleam in her eyes.

“yes.. I did say that” She stood still clutching a silk robe in her hands, feeling a tiny bit nervous.

Sophia smiled with wicked delight and spun marching to the door she darted out leaving the redhead opened mouth back in the room. Suddenly Sondra started to wonder if this was going to be a wise idea after all.

Two and a half hours later under the careful eyes of Lady Josephine and Sophia Hawke, the room had been almost completely remodeled. New chair’s deeper and more cushioned with upholstery done in shades of white and blue, thick plush white and blue rugs on the floor, a huge rare white great bear pelt before the hearth, the balcony draperies reflected the blue and white theme going on. They had a beautiful arching white wood and lace screen brought in to conceal the bathing area. Sondra had to stop them from removing the bed and bringing in a new one, she laid her hand on one of the post fondly and refused, so they completely changed the bedding on it, along with the canopy. Silver scones now held candles, crystal bowls held potpourri, the room looked and smelled like a whole new place. The only thing Sondra had timidly asked for was a free standing full length mirror, the ladies didn’t even ask why they just made it happen.

“My goodness… I was not expecting all this!!” Sondra sat on a new couch feeling overwhelmed.

“But it looks amazing does it not Lady?” Lady Josephine gazed around with a proud smile.

“Yes it does.. but .. just oh my....” she shook her head in awe.

“Oh Sweets we’re not done yet!” Sophia came from around the lace screen. 

“we’re not?” Sondra was confused.

“Nope after you eat something.... you're going to bath.. Lady Josephine found some beautiful oils for you.... and then we’ll do your hair and get you all dressed..” Sophia was having way too much fun with this.

“Yes indeed, you mentioned you liked the smell of cinnamon, I found some oils that have a subtle hint of spices. I also found the most beautiful blue silk and white lace nightdress for you” Josephine smiled happily.

“ummm thank you.. please after all this call me Sondra..” she smiled at the other woman shyly.

“Of course and please call me Josephine.. or Josie ..” she took a moment to sit and savor a cup of tea.

Sophia walked over to them and sat down to enjoy a cup as well, the women began talking about cloth textures, and the pros and cons of certain ones. Sondra’s mind slipped away to something else as she sipped her lukewarm tea. Finally finishing her drink she sat the cup aside and glanced at Sophia who simple pointed to the tub behind the screen. 

She grabbed a robe before moving to the filled tub and using magic heated the water to steaming just like she enjoyed. Adding some of the spicy oils she leaned in and inhaled slowly, the smell was exotic and brought to mind the night she’d danced in front of the fireplace. She stripped quickly and laid her clothes on a small table before slipping into the water, kneeling she lifted the heavy fall of curls and draped them outside the tub, before sitting down and leaning back to enjoy the relaxing feel of the water over her skin.

She rubbed the scented water into her skin, making sure to grab a cloth and scrub herself with the handmade soap that matched the bath oils, from neck down to her toes. She washed her face with a softer cloth, her hair she'd washed the night before and because it took so long to dry she decided to forgo getting it wet tonight. Once she felt satisfied she had scrubbed every inch she climbed out carefully, not wishing to slip and fall again.

Sophia came around to help her dry off, Sondra looked up nervously.

"It's ok sweetheart, I'll help you." Her voice was low and gentle.

Sondra nodded thankfully, while Cole might not care about her scars, she still felt uneasy and ashamed of them. One sat right above her pelvic bone, she never knew if it was something Quentin had done, or a scar the girl had before her death. The few others were soft silvery webs that she could usually cover with clothes or her dance costumes.

She oiled her skin as Sophia played ladies maid and patted her dry. Josephine hung the nightdress over the screen and went to stand by the vanity ready to tackle the heavy mass of Sondra's long hair. As the silk and lace ran over her body she smiled, it reminded her of how his hands felt on her cool and silky. She followed Sophia out and twirled for the ladies who grinned and clapped.

"Oh sweety you look amazing!" Sophia beamed happily.

"The colors are more beautiful than I had imagined... Fire and ice.. So poetic" Josephine sighed wistfully.

Sondra looked down at herself "um it barely covers my chest...".

“Wait.. I can see my.. uhhh” she looked up with shock.

" sweetheart that's kind of the point" the blonde laughed.

It was then she realized the white lace had no silk backing at the top, and the way it was sewn in around her legs made it so when she moved the lace showed what the silk was covering. She felt her face turn pink as she looked around for her robe to cover herself with, and the back scooped to rest on the top curve of her backside leaving her entire back bare except for the silk and lace straps holding the front up.

“Sondra it’s ok, it’s just us and I’ll stop anyone who tries to come through the door… I promise.” she laid a gentle hand on the girls shoulder.

"Ok sit and I'll work on your hair!" Josephine grabbed a brush and some blue ribbons.

Sondra sat and watched Josephine through the mirror as the woman's deft hands singled out curls to weave ribbons into and pulled her hair back off her face, but the rest cascaded down her back like a fiery backdrop for the blue. The finishing touch was a light color to her lips and a smoky tone to her eyes. She added a light blue choker that sparkled with dancing crystals, she loved this choker because of how the sight caught the crystals and made them sparkle.

As Josephine had worked she had tried hard not to look at the silver line around the girls neck. She couldn't imagine how a mark like that had gotten there or how the girl had survived it. Maybe it was better not to ask, some things are best left unknown. Some people should be allowed to keep their secrets to themselves, and this was one of those times Josephine felt the need to not pry.

“Um Sophia can I ask you something?” Sondra caught her eye’s in the mirror as Josie kept working.

“Of course sweety..” the blonde moved closer sipping a cup of tea.

“have you ever used your mouth on Fennie?” her voice was curious.

Sophia choked on her tea almost dropping the cup, it took her a bit to get her breathing under control. Josephine stopped in mid brush stroke and turned scarlet red under her exotic complexion, but she was giggling. Sondra looked back and forth between the two women in confusion.

“am I not suppose to ask that?” she frowned worriedly.

Sophia waved her hand “no ..no it’s ok sweetie I was just not expecting that question..”

Josephine simply shrugged diplomatically, her lower lip caught between her teeth.

“So to answer your question.. yes I have..” she moved to sit fanning her still red face.

“so does he like it?” the redhead asked this earnestly.

The blonde laughed warmly “Ohhhh yes he does very much so..”

Sondra looked up into the mirror catching Josephine's gaze “What about Blackwall?”.

Josephine froze her dark eyes going very, very wide she simply stuttered “I wouldn’t know..”.

“Thats a shame.. he desires you very much..” she smiled warmly in the mirror.

Josephine tilted her head thoughtfully “You know this how?”.

Sophia spoke up “Because your a warm hearted beautiful woman with more talent then we can fathom and he’d be a moron to not desire you..”

Josie blushed again and smiled softly “You're both too kind..”.

Sondra turned slightly in her chair and took Josie’s hand “Love is a beautiful emotion.. and with all this darkness around us.. you deserve something beautiful and so does Warden Blackwall..”.

“Hmm maybe.. but now I must go.. Your hair looks amazing and thank you for letting me work with it..” Josie smiled softly patting the girls hand before turning to leave.

They watched her leave, both had different thoughts on their minds. Sondra stood up and walked around the room, feeling the plush deepness of the new rugs, her hands nervously playing with a ribbon draped over her breast. Sophia chuckled softly and walked over to her taking her hands and leading her to a chair to sit down.

“Ok what’s wrong?” she gave the younger girl a sisterly smile.

“Umm so how do you … you know.. do the mouth thing..” she gnawed on her lower lip.

“Hmmm I don’t know if there is a right way and a wrong way.. I assume men are as different in their tastes as we women are.” Sophia tried not to grin.

“Oh.. maybe I should ask a man..” the redhead looked thoughtful.

“NO!!!.. oh by the maker do not do that…” Sophia felt her heart slam into her chest.

Sondra grinned wickedly at her friend “Oh and why is that?”.

“Ohhh you devious little minx..” Sophia laughed and threw a pillow from the couch at the younger girl.

“I had to” she caught the pillow laughing. “The look on your face was amazing!!!”

Sophia left about an hour later, she knew she had a short window of time to pull off the rest of her plan. Running out to the courtyard, she glanced around seeing most of the warriors who had been training where done now. So she headed to the tavern, glancing around she noted Fenris was sitting with Bull and his Charger’s so she headed over there swiftly. She leaned down and kissed her husband's cheek before grinning at Bull.

“I have a job for you.. interested?” she moved around until Fenris pulled her onto his lap.

“Depends on the job..” Bull sat back in his chair, a grinning woman could only mean trouble.

When she got done explaining what she wanted her husband thought she’d lost her mind, Bull was willing as was his Charger’s, Dorian who had come to join the table was offering his advice. Satisfied she leaned back into her husband's arms, one hand idly tracing the lyrium tattoos. 

His voice murmured softly in her ear “I have begun worrying about your sanity since we got here.”

She laughed and turned her head to kiss him “it’ll be fine my love… trust me”.

Fenris sighed laying his forehead to hers “Famous last words..”.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fairly short Chapter but it was fun to write.
> 
> Enjoy!

As the inquisitors group neared the gate to Skyhold they were meet by the Charger's. Krem walked over and stopped by the Inquisitors heavily armored war horse.

"Does Cole need to be in on the debriefing tonight Sir?" Krem managed to not grin.

The Inquisitor looked over at Cole who sat quietly atop a little paint mare. Then over to Seeker Cassandra who shrugged with a shake of her head. Varric simply gazed questioningly at Iron Bulls second in command. 

“Candles.. firelight.. white on blue..soft silky skin..” Cole was absently petting his horse’s neck.

“Yeah hey Cole come with me I need some help..” Krem coughed trying to get Hawke’s words out of his head, he’d overheard her telling Fenris what they’d done to Sondra’s room.

Cole turned to stare at the warrior, his silver blue eyes going wide “Why are you thinking about Sondra’s room?”.

“See that’s what we need to talk about.. and you’ll be helping!” Krem made a come on motioned to the Spirit.

Varric frowned slowly, watching the tension tighten the rogue’s shoulders, he knew that motion all too well. 

“Come on Kid, knowing our girl she’s probably set something on fire..” Varric moved his smaller mount closer to Cole’s.

“Dear Maker I hope not…” Nicademus ran a hand over his face.

Seeker Cassandra made a disgusted sound.

Varric and Cole followed Krem, but the rogue’s gaze lifted to the balcony that connected to Sondra’s room. He had wanted to simply pop from the stables to her room where he knew she’d be waiting for him, like she always was. But Krem’s odd behaviour made him curious as did the roll in his stomach that coiled and twisted with the need to punch the Tevinter warrior. Varric kept close to the Kid, one hand ready to grab him if he tried to stab one of his dagger’s into Krem, Varric saw the jealousy in the looks Cole was shooting Krem.

By the time they got done, they all wished it was something as simple as Krem and Cole getting into a fight. Trying to convince the rogue to take a bath, comb his hair, change his clothes was a lot like skinning a dragon while it was still alive. Varric had to explain that it was a helpful thing to do before going to visit Sondra’s room, she probably wouldn’t want him to sit on her chair’s smelling like a horse. Krem and some of the Charger’s went to work cleaning Cole’s leather’s and hat, some made noises about just buying the Kid some new ones. But they got it done, Bull and Varric the only two left in the room to keep Cole from running.

“Kid, do this for her because she cares about you… and if you hurt her feelings I’ll kill you for it.” Fenris leaned against the door frame.

“But I do not understand how a bath will make her feel better..” Cole looked up from the tub, he looked like a drowned puppy.

Fenris walked over and knelt by the tub “My wife and Lady Josephine spent all damn day helping her make today perfect for when you got home..”.

“but why? I came back like I always do..” Cole looked confused.

“Because that's what women do for the men they love.. get use to it.. it gets worse..” Fenris smirked.

“Just go with it Kid, make her smile and you’ll get the rewards for all this..” Varric snickered bringing Cole a towel.

“Hell no one does this for the Inquisitor and he risks his life sealing breaches into the Fade..” Bull laughed from the other side of the room.

Krem brought back the clean cloths, and handed them to Bull before turning to leave. Bull set the stuff on the bed and headed for the door catching Krem before the man could make his escape. Leaning his horned head down he whispered to his second in command, Krem looked at him like he’d lost his mind, sighed and turned walking away.

Cole put his clothes back on and suddenly realized why Sondra had been so shy that morning when the Inquisitor had been outside her door, it was a little discerning to have several people standing and watching you as you're getting dressed. He smelled his hat, it smelled nice he liked it, he looked between the three men, a puzzled frown on his face.

“May I go now?” he started getting restless.

“Nope… one more thing.” Bull leaned on the wall by the door.

He opened it when someone knocked, motioned for Sophia Hawke to come in, she beamed at Cole.

“Oh you clean up very well!” she moved to stand beside her husband.

"Sorry make that two more" Bull kept a straight face.

Cole looked between all of them, then gazed longingly at the door. Someone else knocked and Bull opened the door to let Krem in. The warrior was carrying one long stem blood red rose in his hand, he walked over and offered it to Cole. Cole looked at the flower then looked at the warrior in total bafflement.

Sophia walked up laughing and took the rose from Krem who happily let her ad he left “take the rose Cole, give it to Sondra when you go to her room tonight and say something sweet to her.”

“What am I supposed to say?” Cole looked at the woman in front of him like he was lost.

“Whatever your heart tells you to say..” she smiled warmly at him and turned taking her husband's arm and leaving.

Bull nodded to the rogue and left behind the couple, which left Cole starring in confusion at Varric while his long fingers twirled the red rose.

Varric sighed and nodded to the door “come on Kid, I’ll talk as we walk and you listen..”.

The walk to the great hall seemed to Cole the longest one he’d ever taken before, Varric was offering romantic ideas for him to use, Lady Josephine giggled and blushed when she saw him, Dagna and Harrit poked their heads out of Undercroft to smile at him, Solas eyed him from the rotunda. Suddenly Cole felt very, very nervous about going to Sondra’s room that night. Varric stopped with him right outside the bedroom door, he smoothed Cole’s leather tunic, and adjusted his hat like a doting father sending his son off on a first date. Varric walked away and Cole stared at the door like it held all the answers he sought.

Slowly he opened the door, everyone told him this was more romantic and sweet then just popping into her room unannounced and startling her. He peered around the big door his eyes trailing over all the new decor, if he hadn’t already been warned he would have thought he had the wrong room. It was all done in shades of blue and white, it looked like something one might find in a winter cave somewhere. He looked to the bed taking one step inside, she wasn’t there, he looked to the balcony, the heavy blue drapes were closed. He looked to the hearth and walked inside shutting the door as softly as he could, he moved to stand next to a very large ornate white and blue chair. 

 

He finally spotted her lying on a white bear rug, it was almost eclipsed by the satin blue and white throw pillows, it was the fiery sparkle of her hair that caught his eye. She was facing the hearth, one hand tucked under her check the other resting on a wooden box, knees drawn up to her stomach, surrounded by blue silk and white lace the firelight danced over her. Cole stood there unsure what he was suppose to do, her being asleep was not something Varric had spoken about so he popped out to go ask the dwarf what he was supposed to do now. 

He didn’t get two steps past the bedroom door before stopping, for some reason he didn’t want to talk to Varric about this, he leaned back against the wooden door, his eyes on the rose he held in his hand. Cole smiled slowly, remembering a chapter from one of Cassandra’s well loved books, she’d read the chapter out loud to him once. It was about a romantic interlude between and knight, a lady and a long stem white rose and some interesting things he did with the rose maybe he didn’t need Varric’s advice after all.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another fun to write Chapter..
> 
> Enjoy!

Sondra woke slowly, the feeling of something soft and satiny brushing her cheek luring her back to the waking world. Blinking slowly it took a moment for her eyes to focus on and catch the soft motions of a red rose being trailed down her nose, her gaze went from the rose to the hand holding it, the soft cloth wrapped around the palm made her smile. She turned her head following the arm to the shoulder he was sitting behind her one leg bent his arm resting on his knee his hand moving the rose to tickle her, she rolled over scrambling to sit up.

“COLE!! your home..” she pushed off the bear pelt to hug him.

He moved his arm before she broke the rose when she hit him, he used free arm to pull her close, the soft smell of cinnamon and spices drifted up to him as she hugged him. He was slightly confused by everything that had went into making this a welcome home, why the bath, clean clothes, rose, her room being changed. It was very confusing if she was just going to hug him like she always did when he got back from helping the Inquisitor.

She leaned back her smile replaced by a puzzled look “why is your hair all wet?”.

“They made me bath and clean my clothes before coming to see you..” Cole shrugged.

“Cole who made you?” she sat back on her knees gracefully.

He frowned slightly “Iron Bull.. Krem.. Varric.. Fenris and his wife.. they said I couldn’t come to your room smelling like horse..”

She smiled ruefully at him “I’m sorry.. I just wanted to do something nice for you and well I guess Sophia took it very serious.”

“Sondra..” his head tilted the floppy hat hiding his face.

“Yes?” she started fiddling with the lace on her nightdress.

“Your top is see through.. I think they made it wrong..” he said this with no trace of emotion.

She sighed tiredly “I knew I shouldn’t have worn this stupid gown..”.

She pushed up to her feet, and her heart stopped at the ripping sound of lace, she froze closing her eyes “nug shit..”

“I don’t think the gowns stupid.. it’s very pretty on you..” Cole kept his head down.

She opened her eyes sighing and looked down, realized Cole was kneeling on the hem and the tearing sound was one of the lace panels tearing free from the silk. She didn’t know how much this gown cost but if Josephine brought it to her it probably cost a small fortune. 

“no the gowns not stupid.. I am for wearing it..” she grabbed the ripped lace and tugged trying to free it from Cole’s knee.

“why are you stupid for wearing it?.. you wore it for me didn’t you?” his voice was low. 

She leaned over using her fingers to try and pry the material from under his knee, so frustrated she didn’t think to just ask him to lift his knee. 

“I don’t know why.. I just feel stupid.. so my words are getting all twisted… Sophia warned me some guys don’t get it when women get all prettied up..” she tugged again and almost fell when he moved releasing the tension.

His quick hands grabbed her pulled her down before him, kneeling face to face they just stared at each other. Her lips started twitching and Cole looked at her in confusion, which caused her to start laughing like a lunatic. She sat back on her heels, laughing so hard she was having trouble breathing. 

“I don’t understand what’s so funny..” Cole cocked his head inquisitively.

She shook her head grinning “a comedy of errors.. I tried to make a romantic homecoming for you and fell asleep.. you got ganged up on and bathed.. it’s kind of funny nothing is going how I had planned.. but it doesn’t matter because my favorite thing about tonight is your home..”

He reached out cupping her cheek his thumb brushing along her skin softly “no one has ever done anything like this for me.. that you did means a lot to me..” 

She smiled softly leaning into his hand before her eyes flew open “OH.. I got you something!!!” 

She turned at the waist grabbing for the box sitting almost buried under a mound of pillows now, offering it to him she smiled timidly “I hope you like it Cole..”.

He looked down at the box then back at her “it’s a very nice box..”.

“not the box.. what's inside the box..” she nibbled her lower lip, holding the box still.

“oh..” he reached for the box taking it, he sat down crossed legged on the rug.

Sondra sat back across from him, her lower lip caught between her teeth as she nervously waited for him to open it. Gently he lifted the lid, cool mist rolled out of the interior as the light caught the silver of the blade and grip, he sat the lid aside and just stared at the dagger nestled neatly in dark blue velvet. An ice rune shimmered and danced against the silver, the handle almost glowed from the liquid blue insetting that said Compassion, the long slightly kriss blade sparkled with lines of red metal. The dagger was every bit as big as the one’s he already used, he lifted it out and turned the weapon gracefully, the offside of the handle said Cole, it had a perfect balance when he tested it. The edge was razor sharp and ice cold to the touch, he looked up at her his eye wide.

“It’s the most beautiful dagger I’ve ever seen.. it’s mine?” his voice held awe.

“yes.. it's all yours..” she smiled softly ducking her head.

“No one has ever made me anything before..” he gently traced the words on the handle.

“I didn’t make it.. Dagna did.. but I told her exactly how I wanted it to look..” she rubbed her hands on silk clad legs.

He traced the red metal down the blade “It looks like fire in the ice..”

“Uh huh.. I wanted it to look like that.. so you’d know I was with you whenever you're out there..” she started picking at the torn lace.

“Sondra..” his voice was whisper soft.

“yeah?” she glanced at him from under her lashes feeling bashful.

“What's this?” he was holding something else in his hand.

She frowned looking over and then she smiled “Ohhh Dagna made a special sheath for it!”

The sheath was red and white interlocking leather, when he tried it on it went under one arm and along his ribs, almost tucked in but within easy reach for a swift hand to grab and pull the dagger out. He turned the sheath so she could read the inscription on it ~ heart of fire, soul of ice ~ she shook her head slowly a quizzical smile on her lips.

“I didn’t ask her to write that..” she tug a lock of hair.

“I like it .. it’s beautiful..” he returned both gently to the box.

“I’m glad you like it.. I .. wanted to give you something special.. because you're special to me.. and well weapons are something you like and admire..” she nervously tugged the ribbon woven into the lock of hair.

“Sondra..” he spoke softly.

“hmmm?” she wouldn’t look up.

“Your babbling .. want me to help with that?” his voice held a teasing note.

She grinned ruefully lifting her eyes to his “yes please.”

He leaned in and kissed her, braced on one hand he used the other to hold the back of her head, she rested her hands on his legs to lean into his kiss. When he pulled away he moved his hand to her cheek, she leaned into his hand with a soft sigh of pleasure.

“Would you mind if I left for a moment? I forgot something..” he lightly kissed her nose.

“ok I’ll be here waiting” she smiled softly reaching up to run her fingertips along his jaw.

He vanished swiftly, taking the box with him. She sat back on her heels before moving to lay back down on the bear skin rug. Eyeing the fire she used a little magic to bring it to life, before stretching out to wait for him. She dozed back off, one arm across her waist, the other tucked under her cheek, her legs slightly bent and her hair flowing around her like the flames from the hearth.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \-----Pure Erotica!!!-----
> 
> I don't think there is much else to say about this chapter...
> 
> Enjoy!

Cole slipped back into the room, his leather tunic and dagger belt gone, but his arms held long stem white and red roses close to his naked chest. He knelt beside her laying most of the roses in the chair and picking up one of the white one’s, as he leaned over her, he noticed the first rose he brought her was resting in her hair beside her face like she’d fallen asleep inhaling its sweet scent. He stretched out beside her, resting his head on one palm while the hand that held the white rose began slowly running the soft satiny petals along her skin. He drew it gently along her cheek, down over her pink lips, to the sweet curve of her throat, as he traced her collarbone his gaze slipped down to the white lace over her chest. He trailed the rose over one breast and paused to watch the tip pebble, dragging the petals over the other breast he got the same response, the coil of lust that hit him made his eyes blink and his breathing hitch.

He leaned in taking one lace wrapped peak in his mouth, his tongue slid over the taut bud with slow wet strokes, her body arched with a soft whimper. He dropped the rose as he lost himself in the taste and feel of her, his hand went to her ribs splaying open to feeling the heat of her through the satin gown. She arched again as his mouth suckled her, he moved closer caging her with his arms as his mouth changed breasts, her hands moved to clutch his head her fingers tangling in his hair knocking his hat off. He moved his head to rub his face in the silky valley between her breast, she arched gasping softly so he ran his tongue up along her collar to her throat he tugged on the velvet collar releasing the clasp so he could run his tongue along the silver scar, the hand on her ribs slipped down to clasp her hip, his fingers grasping the material of the gown only to find the piece that was ripped out. He moved his leg between her’s, his hand slipping down to caress the bare skin as his mouth moved along her jaw to her lips, his smoldering blue eyes locked with her sleepy sensual brown ones before he devoured her with a kiss.

She uttered soft tempting whimpers into his mouth as one hand went to his side nails digging into his skin, her hips slowly began rolling as she rubbed herself against his leg. The hand on her thigh clenched as he moved his leg closer to her heat, the material of her gown caught between them causing her to whimper in frustration. He reached up and grabbed a handful tearing it as he shoved it out of the way so she could arch her body into his. Her feet shifted to dig into the fur of the rug beneath, so she had more traction to rub against his leather clad thigh. He drug his lips from hers to nip, lick and kiss his way back down her throat to her breast. He shifted his arm and brought the one from her thigh up so he could pull the straps of the gown down baring her breast for his pleasure. He moved the material all the way down to her waist as he claimed one tight bud, her hands moved to clutch the fur under her as her shoulders rolled lifting her breasts to him like offerings. The whimpers and moans she uttered drove him to want more from her, he pulled back using one hand to take hers and place them on each side of the bears snarling head.

“keep your hands there..” his voice was strained.

She whimpered and dug her fingers into the sides of the massive bear head, he moved to his knees pulling the gown down off her hips and along her legs before tossing it aside he stopped to admire the play of the fire light on her creamy body, the way her hair flowed around her streaked with blue ribbons, he knelt back between her legs and ran his fingertips from her throat down over her breasts and along her stomach, something deep inside him took great pleasure in watching her arch into his hands as she made sensual purring sounds in the depths of her throat. Devouring her with his eyes he unlaced his leggings and slid them down, hastily kicking them to the side as he hovered over her, slowly flicking his tongue along her sensitive skin, causing her to arch and writhe under him. He tortured her with his mouth as he suckled each breast until she was tossing her head in abandonment, then he moved down her body to suck and nip at her quivering stomach, he rubbed his face in the soft skin of her hip, inhaling the unique musky scent that was all her.

Moving he slipped his arms under her legs and grasped her waist, as his lips teased along her pelvic bone, his mind barely registering the silver line that marred the perfect skin, the rolling of her hips combined with the throaty sounds she was making captured his attention more than the scar did. He turned and dragged his lips along the inside of her leg and almost lost his grip on her hips when she bucked, turning his head he did the same thing to the inside of the other leg this time his arm slipped over her waist so when she bucked he moved with the motion. The feel of her skin, the musky scent of her, the sounds she made, the way she wrapped around him made him wonder if that was why templar’s kept taking the lyrium, she was a drug to him, one he was enjoying craving.

The high keening scream that echoed in the room when his tongue traced the folds of her core where probably heard all the way down into the dungeons, he had to wrap his arms around her bucking hips as he licked her, his tongue dancing over every fold and line. He suckled the little hidden pearl like he suckled her breast and she arched so hard crying out that her shoulder’s left the rug again bowing her body, she screamed his name when she reached her release, as she convulsed against him she was sobbing and screaming from the power of it. He didn’t stop until she was a quivering puddle on the rug, he crawled back up the length of her body, stopping to kiss wherever her skin caught his attention before he moved to pull her against him. She wrapped shaking arms around his neck her breathing still coming out as trembling little whimpers, she burrowed her face into his neck her legs slipping down his. 

His hips shifted slowly and torturously, his arousal nudge against her slippery heat, rocking her hips slowly she felt him sink into her. She bit his neck with a throaty whimper as he grabbed her hip with one hand and began rhythmically thrusting into her. As she arched into his thrust and bit into his neck again, his hips rocked harder and faster into her, she could feel the power of his passion washing over her calling for fulfillment, she lifted her legs to wrap around his waist and scoured her nails over his back as she arched panting and moaning with each thrust. His hand bit into her hip as he buried himself deeply releasing his hunger inside her body with a throaty growl. They collapsed back on the rug panting and spent, he went to shift slightly so he wasn’t lying completely on top but she tightened her hold on him keeping him resting on her, she ran her fingers into his damp hair and sighed softly against his ear.

“i’m going to thank the Seeker for reading those books out loud..” he breathed heavily against her hair.

“what books?” she barely had the energy to look at him.

“the ones she has hidden in her room..” his breathing was almost slowed down.

“hmm maybe I should read one..” she nipped his ear playfully.

“i could go sneak them out of her room..” his arms tightened around her.

“or I could just ask her to borrow them..” she snickered softly.

“mmm you could..she’s gets kind of prickly when someone mentions them..” he nuzzled her hair.

“bet it’s only when men mention it..” she stretched slowly enjoying the feel of his body against hers.

“you're very loud did you know that?” he grinned impishly.

“ohhh by the maker I screamed didn’t I…” her eyes widen in shock.

“yeah you screamed… very, very loudly…” his voice held a note of pure male arrogance.

“is the door barred?” she buried her face against him.

“I don’t think I barred it when I came in..” he leaned back to look down at her.

“would you please go check? I don’t want anyone walking in..” she gave him the sad eyes.

He moved reluctantly, getting up off the rug and leaving her warm soft body, he didn’t worry about his nudity as he walked over to drop the bar into the door. When he turned back around she wasn’t on the rug anymore his searching gaze spotted her behind the screen around the deep tub. His head cocked as he watched her wet a rag and start running it up the inside of her legs, while the lace obscured some things it didn’t completely hide her from sight. He walked over to watch her curious by her actions.

“why are you doing that?” curiosity colored his voice.

She looked up blushing “umm because when it starts to dry it pulls my skin…”.

He looked down at himself with a frown “won't that happen to me too?”.

“yes most likely.. want me to wash you?” she moved to rinse the rag out in the warm water from the basin.

“ok..” he walked over to her.

She wrung the cloth out and turned to him “put one foot on the stool”

He did as she asked with a bemused look on his face, she slide the warm cloth over his skin, tilting her head to keep him from seeing her grin, she used slow motions to wipe his manhood clean as well as the sack below it. She was biting her lip as she rinsed the cloth and wrung out the excise water, she stroked him through the cloth letting the heat soak into his skin, his body responding to what her hands were asking. 

“you're doing that on purpose..” he leaned in close to her and whispered.

“uh huh..” she shivered.

“why?” his hands went to her waist.

“because.. i enjoy touching you..” she felt her blood heating again.

He grabbed her lifting her up and setting her on the small table causing the basin of water to tumble off and spill all over the floor, she whimpered softly, her hands moving to brace herself as he moved in between her legs his hands grasping her hips and moved her to the edge of the table. He kissed her intensely as he pushed himself into her body, her cry of passion was swallowed by him as he began thrusting into her, her nails dug into the wood as she pushed back into him. The sex was rough and swift as he claimed her and she went willingly into his carnal demands, she threw back her head crying out as her walls squeezed and convulsed around him, his voice echoed her’s as he spent himself inside her. His head fell against her shoulder, she rested her head against the cold stone wall panting.

“i don’t think i can move...:” her voice was weak.

He shifted pulling her close and lifting her up against his chest to carry her back to the bear skin rug, slowly he sank down with her nestling her against him as they laid down. It always amazed her how he could lift her like that when he wasn’t nearly as tall as some of the other men, but he was taller than her by several inches. But she loved it when he did it made her feel all feminine and soft. She sighed contentedly and snuggled back into him, his arm around her waist tightened just enough to make her feel safe.

She stifled a yawn “Cole..”.

“Hmm” he murmured in the back of her head.

“if I say something you promise not to vanish?” she ran her fingers up and down his arm.

“you told me I couldn’t do that no more..” he shifted his head to move his lips closer to her ear.

“oh right.. good since I have you in my clutches now..and you can't get away…” she grinned sleepily.

“yes?” his breath was soft in her ear.

“i love you..” she whispered softly.

“thank you.. for loving me..” he rested his head against hers.

She murmured as sleep took her “i’ll always love you..”.

Cole watched the lights from the fireplace dance over her as he held her tight, while later he slipped away to grab a blanket and gently laying it over her he laid back down she rolled and wrapped her arms around him her face nuzzling his chest softly as she sighed contently against his skin.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \-----Pure Erotica!!!-----  
> You've been warned.
> 
> Enjoy!

She was walking around the ruins in the Fade, a long white flowing gown billowing around her feet as she moved, one hand lightly grazing the broken stone walls as she walked past them. She lifted her head searching for something, she wasn’t exactly sure what she was searching for yet. Stopping she noticed the colors were clearer now than when she’d been here last time with Solas, she’d never noticed colors when she was a small creature, but now she did. She could also pick up the smell of ancient rock and a slight damp undertone to it. She made her way over and around the rubble carefully not wanting to scrap her bare feet raw, stopping her eyes caught sight of a single red rose growing against the grey stones of an old wall. Smiling she moved to pick the flower, having never seen anything so beautiful here on it’s own before. Things could be created in the Fade by a sleeping mind but she hadn’t conjured anything, this was here of it’s own making.

Climbing some loose rocks, she stretched reaching for the red rose just out of her reach, frowning she moved a little higher up the shifting pile of rocks. Holding her breath she stretched more, her fingers just brushed the green leafed stem, going up on tiptoe she tried to grasp the stem of the rose, she felt the stones move, felt her toes loose purchase and cried out as she felt her body start to follow the roll of the stones. Something cold and scaled scooped her up keeping her from falling down, she wrapped her hands around one silver tipped claw and looked up into the curious blue eyes of the dragon.

She used his foot and leg to climb down from the rocks, once she was safely down she smiled up at him, without thought she motioned him to bring his head down to her and he obeyed. She kissed the side of his muzzle, he made a rumbling sound in his chest.

“thank you for saving me..” she let her hand rest on his jaw.

He rumbled softly watching her.

She grinned sheepishly “I’m not known for my wise choices, usually I act first then regret later..”.

He cocked his scaled head inquisitively at her.

She blushed and pointed to the rose high up on the wall “I wanted the rose.. it’s the only thing in this place besides you that's beautiful.”

The dragon cocked one ridged brow at her and chuffed softly.

She cocked her head playfully “did you just compliment me???”.

The dragon rolled his eyes and reached up carefully plucking the red rose with gentle silver claws, then he offered it to her.

She took the rose tenderly and brought it to her nose inhaling deeply, a sound of pure pleasure left her lips. 

“Thank you very much.. it’s beautiful..” she offered the open petals to him to smell, he obliged her.

She tucked the rose in behind her ear and began looking at the dragon questions lurking in her brown eyes.

“So you can understand what I say?” her voice held curiosity.

The white and silver head nodded slowly.

“Ok.. so can you talk?” she inquired softly.

The draconic head shook negatively.

“ohh.. why not?” her brow furrowed softly.

The dragon shrugged massive shoulders.

“What if you took a different form?” she started pacing back and forth in front of the watching dragon.

One clawed foot stopped her pacing as he draw out a giant question mark in the ground.

She stopped to gaze up at him “You have a question?”.

He started to shake his head then stopped a perplexed look on his scaled face.

“if you're wondering why I ask it’s simply because then we could actually talk to each other..” she smiled warmly.

He blew a puff of icy air shaped like a question mark.

“well I assumed if you're lonely you’d want to converse with someone..am I wrong?” she tilted her head watching him.

His head shook no. 

“I could try my gifts but.. ummm I think that might be a really bad idea..” she grimaced.

He pointed to the question mark on the ground.

“Because of what I am… it could cause a really bad reaction..” she shrugged helplessly.

He pointed to the question mark and then gently touched her with a claw.

She sighed nervously toying with a lock of hair “Because I’m not actually human..”.

He rolled his eyes chuffing softly.

She dropped the hair to frown at him “Ohhh scaly smartass..”

He stared at her and started tapping one claw on the ground like an impatient child.

She glared at him “I’m the Spirit of Passion..”

He stopped tapping his claw and cocked his head staring at her with piercing blue eyes. Then he curled his draconic lips into a smirk.

She crossed her arms over her chest, her foot starting to tap under the flowing white gown.

He shook his head no, and looked around finding a tiny rock and sat it beside her, he pointed from the rock to her and back.

“I know I’m bigger now that's what happens when you slip into a new form...I was that small before..” she motioned to her body.

He folded his forelegs over each other and gave her a look that said he didn’t believe her.

Her brown eyes narrowed as she marched up to him “Fine I’ll prove it, you smug scaly assed nug..” 

Without thinking she walked up and gripped his nose roughly, while he was shocked she shoved his head down and kissed him between the eyes letting her power slid over him like a red misty blanket, her hair started dancing on the heated wind that erupted around her body. The dragon scrambled back eyes wide as he saw the power ripple and dance around her like a separate entity. He blew out cold mist as he saw her fire magic start to manifest, the pure icy cold broke through her ignited vexation. 

Shivering she stepped back rubbing her hands up and down her arms, then she glared at him.

“I told you so..” she blew on her hands they were so cold.

The dragon sat on his haunches eyeing her more intently then he had when she had come with Solas, her head snapped around and she smiled tenderly.

“I have to go Cole’s calling me..” her temper tantrum done she blew the dragon a kiss and run off.

The massive head tilted slowly to one side, eye’s watching her leave, as razor sharp claws ripped furrows into the ground. His nostrils flared wide as his eyes slitted with a massive roar he leaped for the sky wings snapping open with a crack of thunder he flew.

She blinked sleepily and gazed into concerned silver blue eyes “what's wrong?”

He rubbed her arms and tucked the blanket closer to her body “You're freezing..”

“Ohhh sorry the fire must have went out” she set the fire in the hearth into a crackling roar, before snuggling closer to Cole.

Cole held her close and felt her go back to sleep, he didn’t want to tell her the fire had been going, her body temperature had suddenly dropped and she’d been shaking uncontrollably. He’d felt the cold claim her skin like a living creature, but the residue felt similar the things he’d felt in the Fade. She didn’t dream for the rest of the night, her slumber was peaceful and gentle.

The next morning she woke up curled against Cole’s lanky frame, she lifted a hand to cover her yawn before laying her hand on his stomach. She looked up to see him watching her, she smiled softly.

“how long do you have before the Inquisitor wants to leave?” she nuzzled his neck softly.

“a couple of hours maybe.. why?” his hand slid up and down her side.

“well you're going to be gone several weeks right?” she kissed his jaw.

“most likely” he murmured softly.

“i’d be remiss if i didn’t make this a really, really memorable morning for you..” she purred wickedly enjoy the feel of him shuddering.

“hmmm this is true..” he shifted so he could kiss her.

His hands moved into the heavy fall of her hair, anchoring her head so he could kiss her with hunger, she made soft sounds in her throat as she opened her mouth letting his tongue claim her. She ran one hand down his back then drugged her nails into his skin as she dragged her hand back up to his shoulder, he groaned into her mouth. She felt the heat coil low in her belly, her nipples peaked against his chest as they rubbed together. He let go of her hair with one hand and ran it down to cup her breast, squeezing gently before rolling the peak between his fingers, she whimpered softly arching into his hand. She pushed him gently pulling away from his lips, her breaths coming out in soft pants.

“let me..” her eyes promised him everything.

Nodding he pulled back regretfully letting go of her soft flesh, she moved to kneel resting one hand on his chest she straddled his hips then leaned over and kissed him hungerly. Reaching down between their bodies she wrapped her hand around his arousal and slowly pumped her hand up and down until his hips arched, his eyes half closed as he panted harshly. Moving her hips she positioned herself then sat down on him, she was already wet and ready for him, his hands clamped on her hips as he bucked under her with a moan. Arching her back she took more of him as she set the tempo, she rolled her hips and rocked gently, he was panting heavily his hands trying to drag her down onto his shaft. Grabbing his wrist she pulled his hands off her hips and slid them to her breast, when he started kneading the soft flesh gently she put her hands on his thighs nails digging into his skin, he groaned deeply as she rolled her hips with a sensual dancers motion. Cole watched her through heavy lidded eyes as she danced atop him, he remembered the first night she’d danced for him and the way it had made him think of sex.

She threw her head back wantonly as she undulated against him, her long hair slithering over his heated flesh like cool silk, the ribbons dangling loosely from her hair swayed across him. She shifted slowly with a sensual gyration her hips moving faster coaxing him to rock his hips, her breathing became erratic as she dug her nails deep into his legs. He slowly slid his hands down from her breasts to her taunt stomach, feeling the muscles ripple as she moved against him teasing and sensually, he ran his hands over her thighs before brushing the sides of her core with his thumbs. The feel of his body sliding in and out of her’s through the soft slick folds made his whole body shudder, he moved his hand so the thumb teased the hidden nub between her legs, he was rewarded with a wanton cry of pleasure from her.

He plucked and tortured the nub with his thumbs as he rocked his hips roughly, she arched growling hotly as she burned brightly for him, the slower she tried to go the faster he flicked his thumb over the nub, she arched forward over him her hands bracing on his chest as she started bouncing above him frantically in need of release. He brought his arms up and wrapped them around her dragging her down to his mouth as he dug his heels in, slamming into her rough and demanding. She whimpered against his mouth as he set a pounding rhythm that her body wept for and craved, between the carnal demands of her body and the position causing friction against her swollen folds she exploded in his arms with a wild cry, he fisted her hair in both hands and pumped his release deep into her. She melted over him quivering and boneless, his legs slammed to the rug both their hearts racing like wild drums.

“humans do this all the time?” he was panting harshly.

“uh huh..” she was gulping air.

“how do they survive?” there was awe in voice.

“i don’t know…” her breath danced over his skin.

“i think i’ll remember this morning very well..” he turned his head kissing her damp hair.

“good.. because I want a repeat when you get back..” she wiggled softly against him.

“I have to go.. I’m being called..” he leaned up and kissed her deeply before slipping her over to the rug and jumping up to put his leggings on.

“Cole..” she stood up quickly.

He stopped to look at her questioningly, she threw her arms around him and buried her face in his neck “please be careful..”

He held her close one hand caressing her cheek tenderly before he kissed her softly “i will..”.

She nodded slowly and stepped back “i love you..”.

He sat his hat on his head and nodded “i know.. thank you..” he vanished.

She stood and looked into the heart of the fire for a moment a cold chill slithered down her spine, turning she went to the big bed and pulled the blankets back before climbing in. She didn’t want to try and sleep where they’d made love so many times the night before. She held one of the pillows tight to her chest, she couldn’t shake the worry she had for him on this trip. She finally fell asleep as the Inquisitors party crossed the stone bridge leaving Skyhold for Adamant.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Emotional Chapter.
> 
> Enjoy!

After four days Sondra was trying to find ways to keep her mind off Cole, she missed his company and his presence deeply. She took up helping in the infirmary, she didn't have a healing touch but she would sit with various patients and chat or read to them. The healer's appreciated the help and with her walking around and checking on people it allowed them to restock their supplies. 

She also took up going to the library and finding new books to read, or she visited with Dorian who had his own alcove piled with books. It didn't take long for her to start asking him questions about magic, he gave all her questions careful thought and answered them in-depth. If somewhat sarcastically. 

She also took time to visit with Maryden in the Herald's Rest during the bards down times. She found the woman to be very witty and fun, it helped to alleviate the loneliness. When Maryden went back to performing usually Sondra went and visited the Charger's.

The gardens were still her favorite spot and sometimes Fenris would come sit and visit with her. He wasn't handling his wife being gone well at all, but he couldn't go with the group this time they wanted to travel as incognito as possible and Fenris stood out as very memorable. Varric had gone with the Inquisitors group both to help Fenris feel better and Sondra as well, both of them felt nothing bad could happen with Varric along.

Sondra sat before her fireplace staring into the hearth and absently sipping her tea, her mind drifting off to wonder about various things. Sighing she sat the cup on the edge of the hearth and settled down to lay on the white bear rug, her hand idly running over the pelt as her eyes drooped in sleep. 

The dragon was sitting in the ruins waiting for her, she walked up and gave him a hug. He tilted his head down and rumbled softly at her, she laughed and kissed his scaled jaw.

“Your becoming spoiled my friend” she moved to sit on a large rock beside him.

He blew cold mist across her toes causing her to yelp and playfully swat at his nose.

“That was Mean!!” she rubbed her cold toes.

The dragon smirked at her playfully, then he tapped the ground with one silver tipped claw.

Sondra looked down and grinned she got off the rock and sat on the thick blanket on the ground next to him.

“Aww thank you!! your so sweet to me” she patted his clawed foot.

He stretched out and lay besides her.

She watched him cocking her head “I wish I could draw or paint..”

He cocked one scaled brow inquisitively at her.

She waved her hands at him excitedly motioning from his nose to his tail “YOUR gorgeous! I never knew dragons could be so beautiful…”

He ducked his head shyly and huffed at her.

“Awwww how cute your blushing!!” she grinned impishly.

He glared playfully and blew a large cloud of icy air at her, causing her to squeal and jump up to run away. It was a bizarre game of chase that the two had taken up playing among the ruins, he would huff and puff, she’d run and dodge and sometimes toss small bursts of fire back at him. It ended back at the blanket where she collapsed laughing and he laid back down beside her.

“your too funny..” she was panting from the run.

He rumbled gently deep in his chest as he brought his nose close and softly bumped her.

She threw her arms around his nose and kissed the scales “thank you for being my friend..”

He didn’t move as she hugged him afraid his scales would cut her, but he watched her intently as she draped herself on his nose her hand gently tracing the scales on the bridge of his elongated nose as she rested her head on him.

She sighed and gave him a final pat before standing “I need to go now..”

He chuffed low in his throat.

Smiling she kissed him on an eye ridge “Of course I’ll be back!.. I love you silly dragon..”

She turned and vanished as the waking world called her back, the dragon sat on the ground blue eyes wide as his big form shivered from nose to tail tip.

Sondra yawned and sat up to see Sister Agatha kneeling beside her “Oh Hello Sister..”

Sister Agatha smiled timidly “I am so sorry to bother Lady, but one of your favorite patients has taken a turn for the worse and I thought you’d like to come sit with her.”

Sondra sat up eyes wide “Not Tessa!”.

“Sadly yes.” the Sister sighed.

Sondra scrambled to stand up her heart breaking “Go ahead Sister, I’ll be right down”

“Of course Lady, I’ll see you in the infirmary.” Sister Agatha turned and left quickly.

Sondra dressed quickly in her heavy cloths, her heart hurting for the little girl lying broken on a cot in the infirmary. She was only six years old and one of fifteen children brought to Skyhold as an orphan. She’d meet the little girl in the gardens picking herbs for the Chantry Sister’s, and had become attached to the child quickly. Tessa had been in the stables looking at the horses when she’d gotten to close to one of the new dracolisk mounts given to the Inquisition. The draconic hybrid mounts hated the colder climates of Skyhold and were extremely mean tempered, the little girl had stepped too close and one of them had gotten a hold of her biting threw the child's arm and shoulder. When it had slung her little body she’d hit a main beam of the stable with a sickening crunch, it took almost all the stable hands and Blackwall to keep the big brute in his stall and get the little child to the Chantry Sister’s.

The bite was bad enough but the beam had broken the little girl's back and caused her lungs to be punctured by shattered ribs. Sondra had taken up sitting with Tessa and reading to her softly, that was how she’d began spending so much time in the infirmary. If she wasn’t reading to the little girl she sang or brushed her pretty blonde hair making her smile weakly up from her cot. Sister Agatha had warned Sondra that the child wouldn’t survive her injuries but Sondra prayed and begged every God and Goddess she could think of to spare the sweet little girl. 

Sondra ran to the infirmary, the Sisters moved to let the redhead sit with the child, she gently lifted the girl and sat on the cot cradling the child’s little body against her. With a trembling hand she brushed the girl's blonde bangs back and softly kissed her forehead, she whisper talked to the little girl in her arms until Tessa took her last breath. She didn’t remember letting go of Tessa or being walked back to her room, Sister Agatha had to go fetch Fenris to help Sondra. He walked her to her room, and helped her out of all her heavy cloths leaving only her light undergarments, then made her drink a cup of tea laced with a sleeping draught before tucking her into the big bed. 

Sighing he gently brushed the tears off her cheek as she cried in her sleep, he wished his wife was her, Sophia would know just what to do and what to say in this situation. He had seen so much death in his life he’d developed a harder shell to it, but he knew Sondra didn’t have that shell she was all passionate fire and life. This was going to eat at her no matter what was said or done to ease it. He rubbed the bridge of his nose and rose quietly to leave he knew she’d sleep for at least half the day and morning was just breaking over the snowcapped peaks of Skyhold.

Sondra knelt in the Fade, arms wrapped around her stomach sobs wracking her body as she cried for the loss of an innocent child. The dragon curled around her carefully, eyes filled with worry as he gently brushed his nose along her and chuffed softly.

At a loss as to what to do, he simply curled around her and offered his strength until her sobs started to lighten up and she leaned against his shoulder. Finally as she cried herself out, she brokenly whispered to the dragon, telling him about the tiny girl who died, all the pain in her heart painted every word she spoke. He let her cry on his scales and gently brushed her with his nose or one claw in condolence. Finally Sondra took some deep shaking breaths and pulled back leaving one hand on his shoulder she pressed the other to her stomach.

He chuffed softly questioningly as he carefully rubbed the back of one claw against the hand she had pressed against her stomach.

She smiled sadly and shook her head “no.. she was not my child.. i can’t have children..”

He lowered his head and gazed at her thoughtfully.

She caught his look “the body I took doesn’t have the ability… and with what I am it’s probably not a wise idea..”

His slitted blue eyes narrowed in irritation his rumble was deeper.

She laid her forehead against his shoulder tiredly “i’m too frivolous my friend.. even i know that..but you're sweet to say it”

He tapped his claws on the ground to get her attention, she lifted her head stepping back to gaze at him in confusion.

He nodded his big head towards the ruins and gently bumped her with one clawed foot, she smiled tiredly and turned walking into the ruins to the spot they liked to sit and talk at it. The place now bloomed with roses of all colors and was a deep lush green from the grass over the ground. He moved to his spot and laid down, she walked over his foot carefully and settled in against his long serpentine neck.

“i wish you had arms… i hurt so bad and i just want a hug..” her voice was whisper soft.

He went very still then turned his head to look off across the landscape.

She tapped the scales of his neck tenderly “i’m sorry i shouldn’t have said that it was thoughtless of me..”

He lowered his head slowly still not looking at her and rumbled in his chest.

“you are perfect the way you are.. and i thank you for being here for me..” she rested her head against him.

Hours later she stood and stretched, sighing softly “i need to go my big brother is getting worried about me..”

As she started to walk away he chuffed softly at her, as she turned to look at him questioningly he blew a misty puff of air that formed a white heart in the air between them. 

She smiled brightly “did you just tell me you loved me?”.

He ducked his head slowly, blue eyes never leaving her.

She laughed warmly and walked back over to kiss his jaw “i love you too my friend..”

He watched her walk away back to the waking world, his reptile slitted eyes dark blue and thoughtful as her laugh stayed with him it was the only one she’d uttered this trip.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Fade time.
> 
> Enjoy!

Fenris tried not to push Sondra too much, she seemed to improve a little but when they buried the child she slipped back into a deep depression. He worried about how much time she spent in her room. Several people told him it was alright it was simply a grieving process for her and that when she was ready she would come back out. He and Dorian stopped by and kept an eye on her, but they tried not to crowd her too much either it was a delicate dance that neither man was comfortable with.

Sondra finally tired of the hovering from both men and decided to shoo them out of her room, softly laughing she told them she wanted to take a hot bath without company. They left very quickly and she set about having the big tub filled and using her magic she heated it, using the oils Josie had given her and with a happy sigh she worked her long hair up into a sloppy bun and settled into the steaming fragrant water. Resting her head against the back she closed her eyes and let the water relax her body.

It was the cold that finally got her to open her eyes and shriek, the dragon sat with his head cocked as he gazed at her.

Sitting up swiftly she sloshed water out of the tub as she covered herself “NOT alright!..”

He clicked one nail against the side of the tub and smirked at her.

She glared and moved one hand off her chest to splash water at his face “dragging me here because I feel asleep in my bath is rude!”

He shrugged his massive shoulders at her rumbling softly.

Sighing she shook her head “Fine but let me go back and get out of the bath before I drown.. I’ll come right back alright?”

He nodded slowly, his blue gaze sparkling with mischief.

She chewed on her lower lip watching him, and yelped as his tail whacked the tub sloshing water and causing her to grab the edge of the bath to keep from slipping under the rolling water.

She woke up with a jolt in the tub the water still steaming lightly as she sighed and stood letting the water roll off her body before she grabbed a cloth to wrap around herself. She gasped as she put her hands on the edge to step over and the cold chilled her, shaking she hurriedly dried off and changed into her nightdress. After brushing her long hair and making sure her door was barred and the fire going she climbed into the middle of her bed, snuggling under the blankets she plotted mean things for her friend in the Fade.

Drifting off she smiled happily because it was only a little over week before Cole, Varric and Sophia would be back and she couldn’t wait to see them. She found herself worrying more and more as the demands of the Inquisition became harder and more dangerous for them all. With that thought dancing through her mind she yawned and fell asleep.

When she walked into the ruins of the Fade she frowned her eyes scanning the area and not seeing her scaled friend now.

“I’m back… where did you go?” she walked to their spot curious as to where he was.

She walked half way through the ruins before she spotted him crouched at the edge of a cliff. Her steps slowed as she took in his posture, crouched over silver nails dug into the edge of the cliff, tail whipping back and forth, silver spines lifted along his back and neck, growls coming from deep inside his chest.

Cautiously she moved closer staying out of range of the scaled tail.

"what's wrong?" she spoke softly.

He cocked his huge head down towards what he was watching so intently. She moved closer and peered down at the valley below. A loud gasp escaped her as she realized what and whom she was seeing.

"Sophia!" she blinked her heart slamming in her chest.

"Varric....COLE!!!" She started shaking.

The dragon rumbled deeply.

She moved to lean out over the precipice “COLE!!!”.

Her heart was racing as it dawned on her that she could see them clearly, they were more real then they should have been and there was other people in the group.

Arms wrapped around her waist keeping her from falling over the edge, she fought against them trying desperately to go over the edge and to her friends.

“you can’t go down there..” the arms tightened around her almost painfully.

“I have too!! their my friends..” she was frantic.

“you can’t help them..” she was pulled back against a chest as her nails dug into unyielding bracers.

“why?.. why can’t I?” she stopped struggling her breath coming in ragged pants.

“because their physically in the Fade… your dreaming in the Fade.. “ breath ruffled her hair.

Her eyes locked on Cole, his agitation clear even from where she stood, her stomach churned knowing he would hate being here like that.

She pulled against the arms “COLE!” tears ran down her face.

“you can’t help him” the voice sighed sadly.

The group in the valley moved out of their line of sight, Sondra shook, more worried than she’d ever been about her friends and the man she loved. Turning it slowly caught up to her that the dragon was gone, and the arms clamped around her were still there. She looked down and the bracers she was clawing at were white scaled, the arms covered in white leather, her hands stilled slowly as worry for Cole warred with the shock that her dragon friend had taken a human form.

“why can’t we help them?” she tried to turn but the arms wouldn’t let her.

“because what they're facing is bigger than either of us..” his hands held her firmly.

She reached up wiping tears off her face “is there anything we can do?”.

“no” he leaned his head against her’s.

She swallowed slowly then patted one bracer “so you finally took a new form?”

“yes… it was the only way I was going to get through to you..” he lifted one hand to gently squeeze her arm.

“may I see?..” her voice was soft.

He stiffened slowly “I’m not sure that's a good idea my friend..”

Her curiosity piqued “why?”

“I had to choose a form quickly and well I used your thoughts to pick one..” he coughed in embarrassment.

 

She frowned in confusion and shrugged “So.. I can understand that actually..”

He sighed softly and held up one hand before her face, she was confused as to why until she noted the soft cloth wrapped around the palm slowly it came to her.

“Ohhhh..” she whispered.

“I’m sorry but it was the first one I could latch onto.. “ he dropped his hand to her shoulder.

She reached up squeeze his hand “I understand and it’s ok.. might have been a bit creepier if it was Solas you picked..”

He laughed causing his chest to shake behind her “Ummm you don’t have to worry about that..”

Carefully he turned her towards the ruins, careful to stay behind her as he guided her back over and sat her down on the blanket, her legs collapsed as she started shaking from the loss of adrenaline. He sat behind her and let her use him to lean against, he could feel the trembles that rolled through her, his hands rubbed up and down her arms slowly.

"I'm sorry you're hurting." he spoke softly.

"it's alright...I'm almost getting used to it" she sighed leaning her head back against him.

He leaned his cheek against her hair "are you going to be ok?".

" maybe.. I don't know...I'm worried for him...them..." her voice cracked with emotion.

She turned and looked at him, her head cocked as he shied away from her, but she laid a hand on his arm and smiled.

"it's alright honestly..I don't mind" her gaze took in the silver and white floppy hat, the white leathers, the pale blonde shaggy hair.

"you got all that from my mind?" her voice held a note of awe.

"yes... You picture him in great detail he was easy to mimic" he ducked his head.

“huh.. thats amazing..but you kept your natural colors..” she reached out tentatively to touch him.

“yes..” he kept still as her fingers caressed his face.

“amazing..” she patted his arm once more before standing to pace back and forth.

He stood up slowly, watching her worried she’d bolt for the cliff and try to climb down again.

She caught his eyes and smiled ruefully “I thought about it.. but I won’t..I promise..”

He nodded slowly, he knew if she got it into her head she’d attempt it without a second thought. He moved to block her path and gazed down at her, it was then she realized he was actually taller then Cole was, she stopped and looked up at him.

“Why did you leave the Fade?” he gazed at her intently.

She frowned slightly “I wanted more.. I wanted to feel what they felt.. to know what they knew.. if that makes sense..”

He nodded slowly “I guess.. but you come back here to dream.. your friend doesn’t unless he has too..”.

“true but Cole isn’t completely like me.. He is the Spirit of Compassion who became a person.. I’m the Spirit of Passion who filled an empty shell…” she sighed wistfully.

“Does it make you happy?” his voice held curiosity.

“Does what make me happy?” she gazed up at him in confusion.

“Being human? being out of the Fade…. being with him..” his head tilted.

She chewed on her lower lip thoughtfully for a second “yes.. I love being human... I miss the freedom of the Fade sometimes.. and as for Cole.. oh yes he makes me very happy..”

He looked thoughtfully at her for a moment before nodding slowly.

“and you love Cole?” he watched her carefully.

“Yes.. I do very much so..” a tender smile curled her lips.

“Does he love you?” he asked that hesitantly.

Her smile fell “I … umm .. I’m not sure.. he’s never said it back to me..”

“Why?” his brows furrowed.

She shook her head slowly “I don’t know.. maybe I love too easily..”

“your perfect and he’s a fool..” his voice was low and angry.

She blinked at him and laughed “I’m far from perfect my friend.. but I thank you for the compliment..”

He stared at her, blue eyes darkening. She felt the rush of his feelings hit her like a punch to the stomach, she took a step back hands clasped to her waist. He stepped closer his head tilting and a predatory look settling in his blue eyes, she stepped away her heart pounding in her chest. 

“what..what are you doing?” her nervousness showed clearly in her voice.

He smiled slowly, following her as she backed away from him.

Her back bumped into the solidness of a ruin wall, she took her eyes off of him for a second to see if she could run around the wall and put distance between him, as she glanced back his arms caged her on both sides. She planted her hands against his chest, but he didn’t do more then put his hands on either side her.

“what are you doing?” she spoke softly.

“something I’ve wanted to do since the first time I saw you…” his voice was as low as her’s.

“no..” she sighed shaking her head.

“why?” he pulled back a little from her.

“because I love Cole and I’m not doing this.. what your feeling isn’t anything more than what I am affecting you because you're in a human form..” she stared at him sadness filling her brown eyes.

He stepped away from her slowly, head tilting so the hat’s brim shielded his face from her “oh I’m sorry.. I’m not used to human forms..”

She breathed a sigh of relief and patted his arm gently “It’s ok… I wish I could figure out how not to do that but I can’t.. it’s not your fault my friend..”

He nodded slowly “Hmmm yes but I’m sure I’ll learn to ignore it..”

She smiled warmly “Most likely you're the strongest being I know..I need to go for awhile..”

She started to walk past and stopped gazing up she hugged him tightly, before lifting her head and kissing his cheek softly “thank you.. for everything..” 

As she left he groaned “that woman’s killing me..”


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Didn't forget just got busy! 
> 
> Enjoy!

Sondra spent the next couple of days fretting and pacing Skyhold, she didn’t tell Fenris what she’d seen in the Fade for fear he’d run off and try to get to Adamant by himself. It ate at her worrying about Sophia, Varric and Cole she knew there was powerful beings that dwelt in the Fade. Things even a dragon wouldn’t go face to face against, some of the demons were the lesser evils roaming the dream realm. She spent most of the day in her room she knew her personality couldn’t hide that she was worrying about something and someone would pick up on it sooner or later.

She curled up in one of the chairs before the fire and tried reading some but that didn’t help, sipping tea and gazing into the fire didn’t help either. Bored and restless she got up and paced before the hearth running her fingers through her hair in agitation she looked down at the bear pelt and decided to just lay down and go visit her friend in the Fade anything to alleviate the stress of worry about Cole.

He was sitting on top of one of the ruin walls when she walked in, he followed her with his eyes, his feet set against the stone as he leaned on his knees. She walked over grinning as her bare feet crushed the soft grass, causing it to scent the air. 

She playfully smacked him on the leg “oh my someone is getting use to having a human form”.

He huffed “I am not.. well maybe just a little bit..”

He cocked his head “so what are we doing tonight?”

She leaned against the wall next to his feet “I don’t know.. what haven’t we done?”

He shoved her gently with one foot and grinned “You haven’t taught me to dance…”

She laughed shaking her head “Alright come on down and I’ll do my best..”

He jumped down so fast she stepped back laughing “Sheesh someone’s excited about dancing!”

He shrugged grinning sheepishly “Of course I am I’ve never done this before..”

She smiled and took his hand pulling him closer “Ok this hand goes on my waist..” he watched her closely. “now your other hand holds mine and I’ll place my free hand on your shoulder like so..” 

He frowned lightly “Um don’t we need music or something?”.

Her face fell “You're right we do…”

He grinned and music filled the air around them.

“tricky dragon..” she laughed warmly feeling the beat of the music and started moving with it.

He kept looking down at his feet and frowning as he tried to follow her lead “I don’t think I’m going to figure this one out..”.

“Stop looking at your feet silly.. look at me and stop worrying so much..” she giggled softly.

He focused on her face and she guided him with the motions of her arms and hips, he finally got the rhythm of moving in tune with her. 

“alright now you lead....” she stopped and waited for him to pick up the dance.

With a cheeky grin he pulled her closer and began dancing her around the ruins, she laughed and followed his lead enjoying the fun of dancing.

“are all dragons as smart assed as you Frost?” she grinned at him.

“Wait what did you call me?” he almost stopped moving to stare at her in confusion.

She blushed bright pink “I’m so sorry.. I just felt bad always calling you the dragon .. and so I sort of came up with a name for you..”.

He smiled “I like it.. Frost.. huh sounds kind of dashing..”

She nodded in agreement “yes it does.. so I take it you like dancing?”

“Yes! this is actually quite fun..” he grinned and spun her around.

“Yes it is but we can take a small break now.. “ she stepped back from him.

He gave her a sad face and she laugh pulling him over to sit on the blanket, once she had her feet tucked up under herself she peered at him closely. He sat down and eyed her back curiously, he propped one knee and rested his arms across it.

Finally the curiosity got the best of him “What?”.

"It's just amazing how you look like him yet you don't....I don't know how to explain it.." She waved one hand impatiently.

“Would it help if I tried to be exactly like him?” he frowned slightly.

“No.. no that's not what I meant.. I’m sorry I’m not saying it very well..” she sighed shaking her head.

“It’s alright.. it must be odd to almost see him.. but knowing it’s not really him..” Frost shrugged lightly.

“Yeah that must be it..” she picked a piece of grass and twirled between her fingers.

“Soooo think we can dance again sometime?” he shot her a cheesy grin.

She laughed warmly “Yes you dance fiend we can dance again sometime..”

She stood up “I need to go now.. but I’ll be back soon..”

He jumped up and hugged her “Alright come back soon.”

She returned his hug warmly and kissed his cheek “I will and Frost stay out of trouble”

She walked away and he watched her, his head tilted down and his eyes shadowed by the brim of his hat.

She woke up and stretched slowly, feeling almost as tired as when she’d fallen asleep. Pulling herself up off the bear pelt rug she went to the balcony windows, pulling back the drapes she realized the sun was rising. Sighing she rested her forehead against the cold glass, she hoped they came home today this waiting was killing her as it dragged on. She wanted Cole’s arms around her just to feel like everything was going to be alright again. Pushing away from the balcony door she went to get dressed, doing something, anything was better than sitting here.

She went down into the garden to sit in the gazebo, she wasn’t surprised to see Fenris sitting there already. She walked over and sat down beside him resting her head on his shoulder as they watched the sun’s rays wash over the walls and light up the ground. He slipped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer, needing the comfort she offered as much as she needed his. 

“You feeling better Kitten?” his voice was soft.

“I’ll feel a lot better when they get home.. I miss them and I worry..” she sighed tiredly.

“As do I ..” he let his head rest back against the bench.

“Does it ever get easier worrying about someone you love?” she played with a lock of hair.

“Not really Kitten..” his voice was gruff.

“I was afraid you’d say that.” her voice dropped.

The bell rang startling them as it signaled the return of the Inquisitor, they looked at each other and jumped off the bench to run for the gates. Crossing the courtyard they hurried before they could get cut off from the crowds of people all coming out to watch the Inquisitor and his group return home. Iron Bull who’d returned from a separate mission the night before towered over everyone else so they moved to stand beside him.

“Bull do you see them yet?” she laid a hand on his arm.

“Not yet little girl..” he shook his horned head slowly.

Sighing she stood on tiptoe trying to look over the people filling the courtyard. Fenris stayed close beside her, and Dorian walked up on the other side of Iron Bull. The crowd around them erupted into cheers, the sounds of hooves on the stone bridge could be heard. Her heart began pounding in her chest as the crowd shifted and moved so she could finally see the group riding past heading for the stables and shouts filled the air welcoming them home.

She moved with Fenris and Iron Bull towards the stables, the crowd was thick but the moved aside for the big qunari warrior. She gladly moved in behind him as they walked to the stables and watched Blackwall and some of the stable hands came rushing out to take the horses. None of the group that rode in looked overly excited about being back in Skyhold. Spotting Cole she moved closer to the paint mare he was sitting on.

“COLE!” she smiled brightly.

He turned and looked at her for a moment before vanishing from sight.

Her smile fell as she looked to see Fenris holding Sophia tightly in his arms, the others moved away to get some rest or clean up. Iron Bull and Dorian were over speaking with the Inquisitor, Solas was heading for his room and Varric looked like he’d seen a nightmare but he walked towards her.

She waited for Varric to reach her and she leaned over and hugged him warmly “Welcome home my friend.”

“thank you ..” Varric’s usually jovial voice was strained.

Pulling back she gazed down at him in concern “Varric are you alright?”

“No Kiddo.. I don’t think I am..” he sighed tiredly.

“Come on let's get you inside you look tired..” she gently lead him back to the Great Hall.

He stopped her, his eyes gazing at the ground “this trip was very hard on the Kid.. give him time ok?”

She nodded puzzled by his cryptic remark “Alright Varric…”

She sat in the Great hall with him for an hour before he called it a day and went to his rooms, she got up and went to the Herald’s Rest. Sophia and Fenris were locked in their room, she went upstairs to the shadowy corner that Cole used. As she walked closer she saw him turn his head towards her, she smiled softly as she almost reached him he turned away from her and vanished again. The hurt took her breath away as tears filled her eyes, she turned and fled the tavern like demons were chasing her, she didn’t stop until she got to her room and barred the door to cry on her bed.


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still on a darker path. Longer Chapter as well.
> 
> Enjoy!

After she spent an entire day in her room hunger finally drove her out. She went down and saw Varric sitting before the hearth so she went and sat with him. She asked him about the trip and he told her, she was ashamed to realize that her head had been so self absorbed she hadn’t even realized that Commander Cullen and a huge chunk of the Templar’s had left Skyhold to go help. He told her about the Archdemon and falling into the Fade, she didn’t tell him she’d seen them there. He talked about the nightmare they went through and how the Grey Warden friend of Sophia’s had died helping the Inquisitor and Sophia get out. 

Several hours later Sondra was walking the battlements, her mind racing like a runaway horse as she chastised herself for not caring more about what her friends had gone through. She moved to stand and look out over the snow covered world that seemed so far below them, she caught motion out of the corner of her eye and turned her head to see Cole pacing and agitated. She moved a few steps closer and simply watched him, afraid to speak or let him know she was there for fear he’d run again. She drank him in with her eyes from the floppy jerk of his hat to the restless motion of his hands as he paced back and forth.

Her heart hammered against her chest with the need to wrap her arms around him. To hear his voice, anything would be better than his vanishing act. He stopped pacing and turned to stare at her from under his bangs and hat, she froze her emotions played across her face as she hoped he would finally give her some sign it was alright for her to go to him. Her heart shuddered as he vanished from sight and the pain almost buckled her knees, her emotions coursed through her the violent need to scream or cry ate at her insides. She clutched her stomach and took deep breaths trying to pull herself from the brink of a painful meltdown.

After finally corralling her misery into a tight ball in the pit of her stomach she walked away from the battlements, she felt brittle like the ice that hung from the eaves. She came down next to the tavern, casting a glance at the door she walked past it and went to the one place that made her feel happy the garden. She curled up on a bench in the gazebo, and stared vacantly at the rose arbor her mind going as numb as her soul. 

Tiredly she got up as it was getting dark and went back inside, she wanted the comforts of her room and with all the hoopla going on she’d see if a tray could be sent to her room. As she shut the door to the gardens she could hear Varric speaking to someone, it didn’t dawn on her who it was until she turned and started to walk past them. Cole and Varric were having a very intense talk in front of the hearth, she took slow steps trying not to catch their attention.

“Sondra come here please..” Varric’s voice called out.

She stopped to look at them Cole kept his head turned away and Varric watched her intensely.

“No..” she shook her head.

“Wait what?” Varric looked like she’d kicked him.

She stopped in front of them her gaze going to Cole who still wasn’t looking at her “I said no.. I might not have much left.. but I have a little pride and I do not wish to be shunned again..”

Varric looked from her to Cole in utter befuddlement “What is going on with you two?”

"I do not know why don't you ask him, since he is not speaking to me anymore... " she felt the tremors start in her hands.

Varric looked to Cole "Kid what's going on?".

Cole muttered something she couldn't hear.

Varric looked even more confused than before.

"Goodnight Varric." she turned to walk away but stopped.

She opened her mouth but shut it and shook her head the tears she had been trying to hold at bay rolled down her face. She walked away quickly feeling like she had lost something important in that moment, but the hurt and anger eating her up inside did not leave room for remorse or the ability to try and reach out one more time.

Varric looked at Cole “Why are you hurting her like this?”

Cole shook his head and vanished. Varric sighed tiredly and rubbed the back of his neck, clearly this was beyond his expertise and he honestly didn’t know how to help them.

Sondra forgot about asking for a tray and just barred her doors, with what little energy she had left she changed into her night dress before sitting down in a chair before the hearth. She watched the flames dance and felt hollow inside, it was a new experience for her she’d never before felt this kind of pain. Suddenly she understood what it felt like to have your heart broken, her’s felt like it was shattered into a thousand pieces. Drained she finally got up and walked to her bed, pulling back the covers she climbed inside and turned to face the dark wall. Her body was so worn out by her emotions she fell asleep quickly.

Frost smiled when he saw her form in the Fade, but when she didn’t move he grew worried and walked over to her.

“Are you alright?” he spoke softly.

She shook her head slowly, her red hair covering her face from his sight.

He moved closer to her gently he brushed her hair from her face and froze, tears rolled down her cheeks but it was the vacant look in her eyes that worried him the most. She didn’t move as he stepped in front of her and tilted her face up so he could look at her, he scooped her up and walked back to their spot in the ruins he folded his long legs and settled her against him as he wrapped his arms around her waist. She laid her face on his shoulder and sat silently crying, it worried him that she wept so quietly.

“tell me what happened..” he kept his voice soft.

She took a shuddering breath “i don’t think i can..” her voice broke.

“just try please..” he moved one hand to rub her arm.

“he won’t talk to me or look at me..” her voice shook.

He frowned slightly “Who?”

“cole” the tears clogged her throat.

“He’s back?” he gazed down at the top of her head.

“yes..” her voice was so tiny he almost couldn’t hear her.

“I’m sorry..” he barely refrained from calling Cole an idiot, but he didn’t think she’d handle that to well.

“how do people survive this kind of pain Frost?” she curled into him like a hurt child.

“I don’t know.. you're the first person whose feelings I’ve cared about..” he smiled ruefully.

She gave a watery weak laugh “i’m glad i have you for a friend..”

“thank you for not running away after the first couple of times..” he smiled down at her.

She tilted her head to look at him laughing weakly “silly dragon.”

He gazed down at her the smile on his face shifting as his eyes went ice blue, he brought his hand up and rested it against her cheek.

She sighed softly “i’m tired of hurting so much..”

“I know you are.. I wish I knew how to help” he sighed and placed a soft kiss to her forehead.

“I’m sorry.. it seems all I do is bring my problems to you..” she groused softly.

His hand slipped down to her chin “I don’t mind.”

She laid her hand over his and squeezed softly.

He gave into temptation and kissed her, for a moment she softened against before she yanked back from him almost falling to the ground.

“Frost what are you doing?” her voice came out squeaky.

He shrugged lightly “I kissed you..isn’t that what humans do to make each other feel better?”

She moved to kneel across from him, hands on her hips “You can’t just kiss a woman ..especially not one already spoken for!”

He looked down at the blanket “Oh..wrong human custom?”

“yes wrong one.... “ she sighed softly and shook her head.

“I’m.. sorry?” he tried for a pitiful look.

She just gaped at him and laughed “You're nuts you know this right?”

He grinned at her “well dragons are crazy.”

She shook her head and sighed “I need to go.. I can’t hide in here forever..”

He stood up and offered her his hand, she took it and let him help her to her feet. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her “I’ll be here when you need me.”

“Thank you Frost..” she timidly kissed his cheek before moving away.

He watched her fade away, with a sigh he went to go wait.

She woke up to someone knocking on her door, stretching she went and unbarred the door opening it carefully she looked out into the concerned face of Sophia.

“Hey Sweety can I come in?” the blonde smiled warmly.

Sondra pulled the door open and nodded “Of course!”.

Sophia gave her a warm hug before moving to sit before the hearth, Sondra followed and sat down curious as to why Sophia was here.

“So umm is everything ok?” she watched Sondra carefully.

Sondra turned her face away to gaze into the fire “why wouldn’t it be..”

“Because Varric is worried sick about you and Cole.. and my husband is ready to kick Cole’s ass..” she chuckled softly.

“Good luck.. he’d just vanish on Fennie like he does to me..” her voice took on an edge.

“Whoa.. I thought Varric was overreacting.. apparently he’s not..” Sophia blinked in shock.

“No he’s not..” Sondra wrapped her arms around her waist.

“Sweety our trip was rough and well maybe Cole’s not handling what happened to well..” she tried to stay neutral.

“I wouldn’t know.. he won't look at me or speak to me or allow me anywhere near him… he vanishes like a coward..” Sondra’s tone turned bitter.

“Oh.. well ummm ..” Sophia sat back sighing.

“I thought we had something special.. now I wonder if it was all in my head and he was just placating me..” her voice broke as she sat back in her chair.

Sophia stared at the younger woman unsure of what to say, she knew Sondra’s moods could be mercurial but this was a side of the younger woman she’d never seen before. Sophia finally understood how Varric felt, and she did not like feeling helpless.

"Did you and Fenris have sex before or after you feel in love?" She turned an earnest look on her face.

"uh well I loved him before the sex but I can't honestly answer for him." She had never felt so put on the spot before.

Sondra sighed and turned to gaze back into the fire "I've told him I love him a few times but he can't say it back".

Sophia rubbed her eyes " it's not as easy for men to say those words as it is for women."

"Maybe I'm pushing my wants and desires onto him and he's just doing what he does best and helping..." that thought made her sick.

Sophia didn't have any words for that.

She stood up and walked over to hug the younger woman, her heart hurt for her friend but she didn’t know what she could say to make it any easier. She slipped out the door and looked back for a moment Sondra was still staring into the fire and hadn’t even noticed Sophia leaving. She went back downstairs with a heavy heart and looked at her husband and Varric and simply shrugged weakly.


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Choices, Choices!
> 
> Enjoy!

Sondra was kneeling at Tessa’s grave when she felt eyes watching her, lifting her head she saw him sitting on a large headstone one foot nervously tapping the rock. Taking a deep breath she wiped the tears off her face and stood up, turning to face him she gazed at him warily not sure if he’d allow her to approach him or not. Holding her stomach she took slow hesitant steps towards him waiting for him to vanish at anytime. She was surprised when he let her get within touching distance of him, his hands twisted anxiously, she didn’t reach out for him she just stopped.

“i’m sorry” he spoke softly.

“about what?” she heard the mask he wore in his voice and it broke her heart, this wasn’t her Cole it was the fake one.

“that you're hurting..” He tilted his head to look at the ground.

“I’m getting used to it..” she shrugged and looked back to the tiny grave.

“you're mad at me… aren’t you?” his voice was whisper soft.

“No Cole I’m not mad at you… I’m hurt.. sad.. confused..” she sighed tiredly and rubbed her face. 

When she brought her hands down he was gone, she stared blankly at the spot he’d been sitting but she didn’t have any tears left to cry with. Shoulders slumped and head bowed she turned and went back to the Great Hall passing by Varric’s spot she heard arguing coming from Solas’s rotunda. One last tiny spark of curiosity pulled her over to eavesdrop on the Inquisitor, Solas, Varric and Cole. They were discussing Cole and his fear of being bound and turned into an abomination, she’d never heard that kind of fear from Cole before and it broke another piece of her heart. Listening to them it finally dawned on her that in his own foolish way Cole had been trying to protect her and all of Skyhold, while she’d been greedy and selfish, he’d been worrying about everyone. She hurried away as they started making plans to follow the pull of magic Cole was feeling, it had him worried because the amulet he was wearing wasn’t working right. 

She darted out to the garden gazebo to sit and think about all she’d over heard, she wished desperately that Sophia and Fenris hadn’t left already. But they’d set out to help the last of the Grey Wardens, and Fenris was not letting his wife go alone, for a moment she almost wished she’d gone with them. She sat out there for about an hour before she finally made the choice to go back to her room, she passed the men leaving swiftly she stopped her eyes following Cole’s back as they walked past. Only Varric stopped to acknowledge her at all, his eyes held sympathy as he reached and squeezed her hand gently.

“smile Flame, I’ll protect the Kid and bring him back to you..” he offered her a smile.

She watched Cole disappear out the door and shook her head sadly “I don’t think it's going to matter my friend...”

“Sure it does … you’ll see..” he patted her arm and hurried after the rest of them.

She turned and walked to her room, a tray of hot tea and bread was sitting before her fireplace, so she hung her heavy cloak and went to curl into a chair. She managed to pour a cup of tea but the bread she couldn’t eat. Her stomach had been tied in knots since the group had returned from Adamant, she had no appetite and she knew she had dark circles around her eyes. But she just couldn’t get the energy up to care anymore, somehow, someway she knew whatever it was she’d had with Cole was most likely gone now. Misery was riding her hard and she was torn as to how to battle it. So she curled up in her chair to sleep, maybe if she got some sleep she could look at the problem with a clearer mind.

She walked into the Fade ruins slowly, her steps weary and tired, she absently ran her hand over some of the lower broken stones that dotted the area. Frost watched her carefully, the despair rolled off her in thick waves and it saddened him to see her like this. He sat on his favorite ruin and waited for her to make her way to him. Lifting her head she looked for him, once she spotted him she made a beeline to the ruined wall he perched a top. He slipped down gracefully and simply opened his arms for her, she entered his embrace gratefully.

“Still bad?” his voice was a soft rumble under her cheek.

“yes..” she nodded slowly.

He sighed softly and rubbed her back “want to talk about it?”

“I don’t know what’s left to say Frost… He left to go find out why a magic amulet isn’t working… but he finally talked to me and he’s not my Cole anymore…” her voice was thick with unshed tears.

“why do you think he’s not Your Cole?” he tilted his head to look down at her in puzzlement.

She tilted her head up to look him in the eyes “Would you know if I walked in here and it wasn’t really me?”

“Yes..I would” his voice was firm.

 

“Ok.. that's how I feel with him now.. a piece of him is missing since Adamant..” she sighed pulling out of his arms to pace.

“what if that piece isn’t so much missing as it is hiding?” he cocked his head.

She stopped pacing to look at him like he’d lost his mind “What are you talking about?”

“What if the piece you bring forth in him is hiding?” he lifted his head to stare at her.

She frowned in puzzlement “Is that even possible?”

“You left the Fade to inhabit a created body...Justice merged with a Mage and blew up a Chantry… there was one who actually saved the life of a lady mage back during the blight… Compassion created a human body… I took a new form because you needed me… why would that be so impossible?” he faced her fully daring her to deny what he said.

She stopped, gazing at him in shock “I hadn’t thought of that…”

“So now you have to ask yourself why is the other piece hiding and where..” he went to lean against the ruin wall.

She shook her head in confusion “how do I figure that out if he won’t talk to me!” 

“Maybe you're not asking it the right way..” his head turned to look across the ruins.

He moved so fast she didn’t see him coming until he grabbed her arms, he pulled her out of the ruins roughly. She felt the tension in the air it got heavier and thick, she knew something big was coming and Frost was trying to protect her.

“I’ll go… don’t worry about me..” she grabbed his wrist and turned to face him.

“You have to hurry it’s coming fast..” he glanced back towards the cliff area.

“Frost..” she tugged his arm.

“Yes?” he turned quickly to glance down at her.

“be careful please..” she kissed him quickly before running from the Fade and forcing herself awake.

Frost turned and faced the thing coming out of the shadows, he held his ground waiting. It moved silently from the shadows that rolled over the landscape and ruins like an oil slick, huge black padded feet fell silently as it’s multiple red eyes stared at the dragon in human form. Frost raised his head and stared back at the massive black wolf, ice blue eye’s locked on red ones as they had a silent battle of wills. The wolf growled and the air shook from it, Frost smirked and crossed his arms over his chest.

Sondra woke with a start, her balance in the chair so bad she slipped out onto the floor with a thud. Sitting up she pushed her hair back out of her face and sat there stunned, wondering what had just happened in the Fade and worried for Frost. She stood up on slightly wobbling legs and began to pace back and forth before the fire, she wasn’t honestly sure how much more she could physically take before her body revolted. The stress and heartbreak of Cole, the worrying about Frost, the inability to pretend to be cheerful when she was a shell of her former self was taking it’s toll on her body and soul. She was starting to wonder if maybe she should just let this body go and return to the Fade, she could follow Frost and knew he’d protect her. 

Sighing in annoyed frustration she went behind the wash screen and heated up the basin of water and gave herself a sponge bath. Stopping she stared into the mirror and grimaced, she’d lost weight and the darkness under her eyes looked like bruises. Her hair hung limp around her, and her eyes were hollow almost no spark was left in them. Anger started building taking the place of the empty pain that was swallowing her whole, slamming her fist down on the vanities surface she glared at herself, she’d not survived this long just to fall apart now.

Marching around the screen she grabbed her heavy cloak and swung it around her shoulders, moving with a purpose she walked out of her room and down the stairs to the Great Hall. As she walked past various guest and residents she smiled warmly and waved but she didn’t stop to chat. She was on a mission one that would take her to the Herald’s Rest, when she got there she stopped by the bar and asked Cabot for a bowl of stew she knew he kept some heated in the back then she headed for the Charger’s table to sit with them. 

“well hey there little girl..you finally decided to join the land of the living again?” Bull sat back in his favorite chair.

“Yes I did..” she smiled at him a little spark danced behind her brown eyes.

He leaned forward “Good.. we missed you girl..”

“I missed all of you too..” she grinned feeling a lot more like her old self.

She ate two bowls of stew and sat with the Charger’s for several hours talking and laughing, letting the comradeship and laughter lift her spirits. It was late when she finally stood up to bid everyone goodnight, Krem stood and offered to walk her back to her room she gladly accepted the warriors company.

“Lady.. would you get upset if I asked what happened to cause this change in you?” he asked her as they walked across the courtyard.

She didn’t speak until they were on the stairs “I’m not sure what happened or how to explain it.. and please after all this time I think you could call me Sondra..”

Krem bowed his head respectfully “As you wish.. I’m sorry about whatever it was..”

“Thank you Krem.. I appreciate that.. I guess I was wallowing so deeply in my own pain I didn’t realize just how many friends I had made here in Skyhold..” she smiled sheepishly.

He shoulder bumped her gently “Well we’re all glad that you're showing your old spark..”

They stopped at her bedroom door she looked at it and back at Krem nodding “Thank you it means a lot to me .. I’ll see you all tomorrow.. Goodnight Krem”

He waited until he heard the bar cross over her door before turning and making his way back to the tavern. Sighing she turned and hung up her cloak then walking over behind the screen to change out of her clothes and slip into a nightgown. This time when she crawled into the middle of the big bed it was because she was genuinely tired from doing something besides crying and being depressed. Snuggling in she stared at the canopy of her bed and tried not to miss Cole, she missed cuddling with him. Sighing she curled onto her side and forced herself to go to sleep, she was still worried about Frost.


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Life got in the way of things, sorry it's taken me so long to get the last few chapters up!!

Stepping into the Fade ruins she could smell the roses that grew wild all over now, they perfumed the air and made for a scented welcome when she came to visit now. She had to stop and take a moment to admire the beauty of the flowers there were so many colors and they seemed to be anchoring to all the old ruins rocks and formations.

She smiled as she gently fingered the soft petals of a yellow rose. The skin of the rose felt like silk under her fingers and she marveled at how real it felt even though she knew she was sleeping. Grinning she glanced down at the dress she was wearing and changed the color to match the rose, twirling she was pleased with how it looked when the skirt belled out. 

She walked into the heart of the ruins and it struck that all the roses here were white and silver against the greens of the vines and grass their heavy perfume wafted on the air, but the whole area just felt like a garden paradise. In the very middle sat a large spread out blanket with pillows and she couldn't help but go sit down in the middle to admire the beauty blooming around her, it helped ease some of the pain in her heart.

She settled in and took time to pile several pillows behind her back to lean back, the sky wasn't as blue here as in the waking world but it was still lovely and soothing to lay back and gaze up into it’s endless depths. Sondra was glad she came here this time, it felt right, but most of all it felt peaceful to her. Right now more than anything she needed that sense of tranquility, she was tired of feeling torn, tired of feeling lost, tired of feeling alone and most of all tired of feeling broken.

Frost walked out from behind one of the larger broken wall pieces to come over and sit down beside her, she smiled up at him, he stretched out on his stomach and watched her as she watched the sky. Playfully he reached over and tapped her on the tip of the nose, she swatted playfully at his hand laughing.

“Pesky dragon!!” her voice reminded him of how she used to be.

“well yeah.. feeling better?” his voice was teasing but his eyes were watchful.

She tilted her head to look at him and smiled brightly “Yeah I am .. thanks to you and some friends in the waking world..”

“I’m glad… I was worried about you…” he looked down at his hands “What caused the change?”.

 

She sighed softly “I got sick and tired of feeling sorry for myself..” she waved her hands impatiently, “My pity party of one became a lonely place to wallow.”

He propped his chin on one hand and nodded “I know that one all too well..”

Her voice softened almost shyly “you're the reason I got angry at myself for being a coward..”

He looked up at her in confusion “Me?”

“yes… you’ve been here a long time alone and sad.. but yet when I stumbled into your home you protected me and became my friend.. here I was being a self pitying fool and I brought all my woes and sadness to you and every time you stepped up and offered your friendship to get me through it...it showed me how selfish and shallow I was being..” she chewed on her lower lip nervously.

He scooted closer to her “You're not selfish.. or shallow.. or self centered.. stop saying those things..” 

“yes I am.. “ She smiled sadly.

He leaned on one hand to cup her chin with the other, gently he forced her to look at him, his eyes were pure ice and his voice iron “No… you are not..”

She smiled ruefully one delicate hand reaching up to rest on the one he cupped her chin with “I’m starting to worry about your eyesight.. you see something I do not..”

“If I could show you what I see... it might melt your poor tiny mind..” his icy eyes melted into a beautiful blue, he cocked his head slowly the brim of his floppy hat getting closer to her.

She let go of his hand to reach up and flick the brim of his hat playfully “If you smack me with that hat I’m going to toss across the ruins..”

He mock frowned at her “You're so mean to my hat..”

She laughed, and it was a real honest sound that made him smile in return, he could feel the joy dancing off her like sunmotes in the air. It made him want to curl around her and bask in the beautiful warmth that was her.

She brought her hand back up to cup his cheek her eyes soft and warm “I know I always say Thank you… but if it wasn’t for you I’m not sure I could have survived all this Frost..”

His thumb lightly danced over her skin “If not for you I wouldn’t know how to live..”

It was her turn to be confused “What do you mean?”

His eyes slipped down to her lips as his thumb moved closer to the pink corner “I was asleep… hibernating.. whatever you call it.. but when your challenge rang across the Fade it hit me hard enough to knock me out of my self imposed exile… I felt you like a volcano... you melted my icy prison..”

“How could you be asleep in the Fade?” her soft hand on his face made him want to lean into her touch but he resisted the urge.

“Just like the waking world sleeps and walks the Fade.. so can we sleep and walk the waking world.. think about it.. you did it when you followed the young lady that lead you to the body..” his thumb slowly traced the edge of her lower lip.

Her eyes widened slightly “ohhhhhh I never realized that…” 

She grinned suddenly “Soooo what did you dream about?”

His gaze lifted from her lips to her eyes “You”.

She blinked in shock “what?”

He lowered his head closer to her’s, his eyes darkened to a deeper blue “Justice always did have a big mouth… even before his Host..”

She opened her mouth to say something but stopped, her expressive eyes swirled with confusion, a little anger, and something else just before her lips curled and she laughed in his face.

He sighed and shook his head “Woman are you laughing at me?”

She shook her head giggling “YES!”

His eyes narrowed slowly “Why?”

She grinned wickedly “Because then you saw what I did to Anders…”

His grinned echoed her’s “oh I did.. I was glad you set his robes on fire..”

She lifted her free hand and placed it on his other cheek “Frost?”

He was still grinning thinking of the image of Ander’s on fire “Hmmm”

 

“Are you going to get around to kissing me soon?” she gave him her most innocent wide eyed look.

He stopped grinning and looked at her in shock “Uhhh what makes you … umm say that?”

She smirked up at him “Because a man doesn’t invade a woman’s personal space like this unless he’s going to dance with her or kiss her.. and since we’re laying on the ground I doubt we were going to dance..”

She watched his eyes darken to such a deep blue that they were almost black, she felt the tremor shake the hand cupping her cheek.

“I mean unless you really want to da..” he cut her off as his lips took her’s swiftly before she could change her mind. He tasted the warmth of her, she felt the coiled power in him, he teased her lips and traced them with his tongue until she opened her mouth and let him in. 

She felt the fire of desire slam into her like a physical blow, it danced through her body and over her skin like a living entity. Her hands slid up to curl into the shaggy hair that curled around his face, his hand moved from her cheek down to her throat to curl around the side his thumb setting on the pulse point in her arched neck. She felt her nature starting to raise it’s head deep inside, it was answering the call of his untamed soul, it felt like her entire being literally called to his on some level she never knew existed. She regretfully turned her head away tenderly placing a gentle kiss to the side of his mouth.

She was panting softly “Frost I have to stop..”

He rested his forehead against hers his breathing as erratic as her own, he closed his eyes against the rush of longing coiled inside him. The hand curled around her neck tremble with the force of his desire, her stomach tightened like a coiled spring inside her.

She licked her lips tasting him “I should go..”

His hand spasmed along her neck but he nodded slowly “yes.. but I don’t want to let you go..”

“Honestly I’m not sure I want to go.. but I need to see things through.. I can’t leave what if’s..” she sighed wistfully her hands gently caressing his hair.

He opened his eyes and this close she could see the swirling of blue, it looked like ice lightning flashing in the depths, and it took her breath away to see the emotions and hunger. He could see the whispers of fire deep in her chocolate eyes, the flames flickered and danced.

He moved to stand and offered her his hand to lift her from the ground, he knew if he didn’t let her go now he wouldn’t let her go at all. Before she completely got her balance he pulled her into his arms and held her close, his face buried in the depth of her flame colored hair inhaling her scent into his soul. She wrapped her arms around his waist and nuzzled his chest, smelling the leather and wild musk that was pure dragon it reminded her of cold winds racing through the air of Skyhold.

She whispered softly against his tunic “I’ll come back I promise..”

He nuzzled into her hair by her ear “I’d come for you.. but only if you asked me too..”

Reluctantly she pulled away from him, it took everything she had to let him go and walk away. The feelings that warred inside her scared her, she felt worry and fear when Cole would leave with the Inquisitor but it dawned on her she never felt this terrible wrenching of her soul. It was like she was leaving her very life behind as she walked away from him, which set the guilt she’d been running away from back to gnawing at her in full force.

Frost stood there for some time staring at the spot she’d vanished from, he felt the other one move up and stand in his sanctuary but he allowed it.

“What a tangled web that’s being woven..” the other spoke softly.

Frost didn’t bother speaking.

“I sincerely hope you know what you're doing…” the voice held mild reprimand. 

“So do I.. I’m in so deep there’s no getting out.. I don’t want out..” Frost turned to gaze at his visitor.

The other shrugged lightly “Your choice.. but you're going to get burned before your done..”

Frost rubbed a hand over his face ruefully “of that I have no doubts…”


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So my original thoughts took a drastic turn and I decided to follow them and see where it would lead me. This is where they galloped off too.

Sondra woke up and just laid there, she could still taste Frosts kiss. Her fingers rose to settle against her lips wistfully, she'd have given anything to stay there in his arms but she owed it to herself, Cole and their friends to try and smooth out what had happened. Even though she wasn’t sure what had actually happened.

She rolled over enough to look at her balcony doors, she left the heavy drapes cracked so that she could tell it was still very dark outside. Sighing she got up and slid over to the side of the bed, her mind was racing with thoughts so it took her a bit to see the shadow sitting in one of her chairs before the barely flickering fire.

She got up and walked over to sit in the chair next to his, she tucked her legs under and sat curled up facing him. He tapped his foot and plucked at his tunic, his hat low enough to hide his face.

"Hi..." she spoke softly to him.

He stopped moving and cocked his head slowly "I'm sorry.."

She kept her voice neutral for fear of him vanishing again "for what?"

"For hurting you...I didn't mean too" his hands started to fidget again.

"Varric says I hurt you, and I'm here to help not hurt and I want to make it right...but I don't know how..." His voice was tinged with sadness.

Sondra gazed at him thoughtfully, something nagged at the back of her mind "Compassion do you even know how you hurt me?"

His hat flopped wildly as he shook his head no.

She opened all her senses the power of her danced out on the air like a soft pink and red mist to gently wrap around him, he moved his head slowly to gaze at her, his unique power a soft white light against hers. What she felt or more of what she didn't feel shook her, there was nothing of the Cole she had loved and made love too. This was the Spirit of Compassion and it was pure innocence and guileless naivety. He gently matched her spiritual essence, a soft smile curling his lips.

"Passion...warmth.. life.. happiness...." His soft voice held awe.

"Yes all that.. and more..." She smiled sadly.

She pulled her power back, his pure essence smelled like incense and purity. Her breath caught as it clicked in her mind that he gave off none of the things she had associated with Cole. This was the person she meet the first day in Skyhold, but not the one she'd come to know intimately or had fallen in love with or faced off against. This young man held none of the razor edged danger that her Cole had, her mind whirled at the confusion. 

"Did I help? You're hurt doesn't burn so brightly now.." He looked at the floor.

"Yes my friend you helped... More than you know.." she smiled tenderly at the spirit.

Compassion nodded and vanished from the chair, there was no density to the air or the ripple of power. He was simply gone, she felt the tender nudge of forgetfulness but it had no hold over her and she knew it was merely an automatic action on his part.

Standing she paced before the hearth, waving one hand she brought the fire to life. Her confusion was like a blanket over her mind, if that wasn't her Cole and quite possibly never had been then who was the Cole she had been so attracted to. Who was it that had come to her and awakened her emotions to the level where she’d fallen in love, and better yet why had he done it. 

She snapped to a stop before the hearth, brown eyes turning molten as she finally understood something, the way she’d been told how she wasn’t asking the question right. She sent all the pain she felt into a summons to Cole, if she was right the Cole she knew would come because he couldn’t help himself. She was panting softly from the exertion of her emotions, but her breath stopped when she felt the change in the air of her room it became dense and thick but the ripple rolled out like it always did.

"Sondra?" His voice settled around her like a caress.

"Cole..." she kept facing the hearth almost afraid to turn around.

"yes... Your pain called me..." His sounded worried and confused.

“i’ve missed you..” her voice was thick with pain and sorrow.

She felt him move closer his scent drifted to her the smell of fresh snow and icy air, her eyes drifted shut in sensual pleasure letting his scent awaken her soul. His hands came up to her shoulders his cheek rested against her hair.

“i’m sorry..” his voice couldn’t hide the pain.

He tilted his head to nuzzle her hair, needing the contact with her, his floppy hat smacked her softly.

“I’m going to toss that hat across the room..” she spoke softly.

“Your so mean to my hat..” his eyes closed in pleasure inhaling her scent.

She whirled so fast he didn’t have time to move as she hit his chest with both hands hard enough to cause him to stumble back into one of the blue and white chairs sending it crashing over to the floor and him with it as he lost his balance, her eyes snapped with rage and her hair was dancing on the heated air that was starting to swirl around her.

“You BASTARD!” she hissed at him.

His eyes widened as he watched the beauty of her rage start to swell “Sondra what’s wrong? what did I do?”

She stalked towards him slowly “Do not play innocent with me…”

He shook his head in confusion his hat sitting lopsided from the force of her hit “i don’t understand…”

She waved one hand and sent the fallen chair into the far wall so she stood above him “STOP lying to me…”

He was mesmerized by the fire that danced around her, the richness of her hair had little sparks leaping and flaring as she stood above him.

“Am I done humiliating myself for your pleasure?” her voice faltered softly a tiny chink in her armor of rage.

“Sondra…” he scrambled to stand up and face her, his silvery blue eyes imploring her.

She waved one hand impatiently “why? why me?... why the lies? … answer me honestly..because I asked you came for me....Frost”.

He stopped, his head lowered slowly but his eyes stayed trained on her “how did you figure it out?”

The fires of her rage started to simmer down, her shoulders slumped as she shook her head “It was a lot of little things.. but it was the taste of your kiss in the Fade… the words you used… mannerisms that didn’t fit… my own feelings for you that was the last puzzle piece.. and the real Compassion was just here and nothing about him was like the Cole I loved.....”

“Will you let me explain?.. will you listen openly or will you condemn me out of hand?” his voice was neutral.

She stepped away from him and wrapped her arms around her stomach “I’ll listen..”

He walked over to the second chair and sat down, his gaze turned towards the fire dancing in the hearth “Why?.. that's actually simple. The Spirit of Compassion was hurting so badly for the dying mage that it’s pain called to me.. I was curious as to why the tiny spirit wanted to help the dying man..” 

He glanced up at her sideways “I could not fathom why Compassion would weave its essence with a dying human… Compassion begged me for help.. so I did… I gave the spirit the power to make a body… but I got pulled along to a degree..”

She stared at him, gnawing absently on her lower lip.

He looked back to the fire “I had seen you before, back in Kirkwall.. as I said Justice was a big mouth gossip worse than any human female. His constant verbal rants about you peaked my curiosity until I finally had to see for myself...I saw you dance and I thought you were the most beautiful creature I had ever seen… but Compassion was still trying to do what he needed so I couldn’t stay.”

She got tired of standing and slowly sank to the bear pelt on the floor, knees drawn up and chin resting on them while she listened to him.

“Because Compassion came here to help the Inquisitor I had to follow but I was actually staying out of sight and laying low.. hence the hibernation in the Fade.. but then I felt a pull I couldn’t deny.. I felt you..” he turned his eyes and pinned her, the blue depths took on a smoldering heat.

Her arms spasmed around her knees and she dropped her gaze.

“I tried to fight it.. but the more I eavesdropped the worse it made it… seeing you in the bath didn’t help either…. or watching you dance…. a man can only take so much..” a tender smile curled his lips, she lifted her eyes in time to see it.

“But the night you poured your heart out and apologized to me I lost it…. I wanted to rattle your safe little cage and most of all I wanted you to see me.. not Compassion.. but me.. Cole.. Frost whatever you want to call me...I almost told you then but when your pain reached me I knew I couldn’t say anything…” he sighed and rubbed his face with one hand.

“I was in too deep and I couldn’t risk losing you completely.. but when you got pulled into the Fade by the Desire Demon I almost went insane...Compassion was banned from the meeting because of his ability to open his mouth and talk without thinking…” he shifted his body moving closer to the edge of the chair and rested his arms on his knees.

“When you screamed your challenge across the Fade… it ripped my sleeping form from it’s slumber and I was dealing with being in both worlds.. my natural side went insane because you were in danger.. I went nuts because I couldn’t get away from Compassion long enough to help you... and I’ve never been so scared in my existence…” his voice thickened with emotions.

She startled when she felt his hands on her face, making her look up at him “as for not saying the words you wanted to hear… there was no way I was going to tell you I love you when you saw me as another man..”

“so what are you now?” her voice was a whisper.

He cocked his head and smiled “for all intents and purposes I’m Cole..Compassion is loosing it’s grip on this side.. before long it will return to the Fade..”.

Her eyes widened in fear “Will that make you return to the Fade?”

He leaned in closer “no”.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Close to the End now.
> 
> *****EROTICA*****

*****EROTICA*****

 

Her eyes widened "so you can stay?"

"Yes.." he nodded slowly.

She nibbled on her lip, her eyes lifting to his only to skitter away again timidly.

“you're killing me here woman…” he released a groan that ended on a sigh.

Her hands grabbed the front of his tunic, her fingers digging into the leather, her dark eyes stared into his blue ones with an intensity he’d not yet seen from her. Slowly she shifted her body getting her feet under herself, she rose bringing him up with her, standing face to face she tilted her head but kept eye contact. He was starting to worry as she hadn’t said anything nor was her normally expressive face giving him any clues as to what she was thinking. He felt her body raise up on tiptoe, her hands tugged him down to her, he wasn’t sure if he should just go with the motion or worry she was going to incinerate him. But he didn’t want to do anything that would cause her to pull away from him.

Cocking her head to one side her voice was a soft whisper “don’t ever lie to me again… but more than that do not ever leave me again…”

She waited for the words to sink into his mind, his eyes told her first as they went stormy and his arms shot out to wrap around her dragging the length of her willing body against his. He buried his face against her hair, she snaked her arms around his neck pulling him in. The feel of him in her arms after the last few months was like paradise, she’d missed the feel of him the way he filled all the empty places in her heart and soul.

“your forgiving me?” his voice was rough with emotion.

“I love you … of course I’ll forgive you..” her soft words danced over him.

“I told you I can’t seem to stay mad at you...and.. i’ve missed you so very, very much..” her tender tone touched his heart.

He pulled back and gazed down at her in awe “I love you Sondra… I have since the first time I saw you..”

“Cole..” she tilted her head and peeked at him from under her lashes.

“Yes?” he gazed down at her ready to do anything she asked of him to make amends.

“Are you going to kiss me now? or are we going to dance?...or maybe finish that lecture?..” she playfully batted her lashes.

His eyes went midnight blue as he lowered his head “Or maybe we’ll do all three…”

She purred as her body arched into him “Ohhh… yum…”

He kissed her with a intense passion that almost consumed them both, his lips demanded entrance and she opened to let him in. His hands gripped her desperately and pulled her tight, she grabbed handfuls of his hair and gave back as much as he dished out. He ran his hands down her sides to grasp her hips and pull her against his painful hardness, she gave a throaty purr into his mouth. 

His lips dragged away from her’s to trail hungrily over her cheek down to her throat, his teeth nipped along the arched column, his hands bunched her long gown as he pulled it up to get access to her soft skin. She arched making sensual sounds in her throat as her need for him ignited deep inside, she shuddered when his hands slid over her naked hips to grasp the firm globes of her rear. In one swift motion he grasped her and lifted her over his shoulder to turn and stride towards the bed. His wants, needs and desire was to long unsated to play gentle right now, he had to have her and it was all he could do to just get over to the bed first.

She gasped and took the chance to rake her nails over his leather clad ass, he playfully smacked one of her firm butt cheeks and growled. He tossed her on the bed and watched her fight the wild curls of hair out of her face, while his hands worked the clasps and buckles of his cloths. Watching him stand there and strip caused her body to heat, the core of her clenched painfully as lust built. She gave him a look of pure sensual desire as she reached up and grabbed the thin straps of the silk gown and pulled it down slowly, letting the material catch on the peaks of her breasts, they puckered tightly as he made a low hungry sound. Fueled by the passion coming off him she moved slowly and wantonly pushing the gown down over her stomach to her hips, taking the time to let his eyes follow every motion she arched letting the material glide down her legs so he could see her all of her naked and willing.

His cloths hit the floor without a care, his under tunic was torn in a fit of temper when the ties knotted, his hands were on the laces of his leggings when he went completely still eyes riveted as her hands slid back up her legs, silky thighs falling open so he could drink in every sleek inch of her. When her fingers glided over the most intimate part of herself, the unique scent that was completely hers wrapped around him as seductively as the woman herself did. Her hips arched invitingly as her fingers teased her silken folds, leggings forgotten he moved to the bed and crouched between her thighs. He clasped the wrist of her wandering hand and brought her fingers to his face, with a hungry growl he began to lick and suck each finger clean of her honey.

Her eyes rolled back into her head at the pure undiluted ecstasy that tore through her soul when his mouth claimed her fingers. She moaned and arched up inhibitions completely leveled by the fire coursing through her blood, his tongue traced along her palm before he leaned in and gently bit the inside of her thigh. She writhed and bucked as his tongue lapped at her folds, his mouth claimed her body as his wicked playground. He took his time torturing her with his mouth, tongue, lips, and teeth he wanted to drag every whimper, throaty moan, and wanton scream from her that he could. She was his completely heart and soul and he wanted every ounce for himself with a greed that rivaled the Gods.

He felt her body racing to the edge of her pleasure and pulled back, she whimpered and rolled her hips begging him to take her to the peak. He moved back and remembered he still had his leggings on, with a frustrated snarl he ripped the laces out and almost tore the leather pulling them off and tossing them aside, he wanted to be buried in her silken fire and nothing was going to stop him not even a breach opening in the middle of the room. Grabbing her legs he pulled her to him, the sensual sounds she made told him she was as eager as he was, grasping her hips he lifted her ass, leaning forward he slammed into her warm body with all the passion and hunger that had been built up over the past few months. Her body bowed up as she screamed with pure sexual hunger, he made a sound that no one could have said was remotely human. 

He drove into her body with a fury that she meet head on, matching him thrust for thrust her nails tearing into the sheets of the bed as her body demanded everything he was offering. As her legs locked around his waist he reared back feeling her inner walls starting to convulse around his shaft as her release exploded around his throbbing manhood. With an almost bruising grasp on her hips he rode her straight into his own release, he roared as her slick inner walls milked him dry. 

He barely caught himself from collapsing on top of her, he managed to roll to the side and pull her close as they both lay panting harshly. It never ceased to amaze him the way she willingly took anything he offered and returned it ten fold, her ability to show him everything she was and her tender honesty humbled him and at the same time made him crave her all that much more.

He pressed his forehead against her hair while he pulled her sweat slicked form closer, she still trembled from the force of her release. 

“uh.. wow..” her voice was a breathy whisper.

“that was just the beginning…” his hand slipped from her waist to cradle her breast.

“ooohhhh ….yum” she arched slowly into his hand.

"so what would you like to try next?" He rolled her nipple between his fingers gently.

"um ... I don't know..." Her voice ended on a soft whimper.

He moved his head down to run his tongue over her breast playfully, she gasped unabashedly and drove her fingers into his hair. His lips and mouth replaced his hand as he suckled and rubbed his face between the soft mounds of flesh. He nipped and licked between suckling the tight little peaks, until she was writhing and making those sexy sounds in her throat. He slid one hand down to the soft slick folds between her legs, nimble fingers plucked and teased the hidden nub as her hips arched wantonly against his hand. He loved her sensual passionate response to him, the fire that flowed through her and lit her up, her wildness brought out the wickedness in him. 

He pulled back and looked up at the headboard of her bed, a wicked smile danced over his lips as she lay panting beside him. He knelt on the bed and offered her his hands which she took without hesitation, he pulled her up and gently turned her to face the headboard, she glanced at him questioningly. He tilted his head and grinned sensually at her, her eyes darkened into the richest chocolate as she waited.

“grab the headboard.. “ he nipped her shoulder.

She shivered and moved closer to reach for the decorative iron, he loved the way she trusted him without hesitation, he moved in behind her his hands guiding her legs to open. She was at a slightly bent angle that he found very erotic especially when she turned to glance back at him over one shoulder with a soft sensual look in her eyes. He had intended to go slow and tease her but that look caused his blood to pound through him. His shaft was so hard it was painful, he needed to be inside her willing body and the sooner the better.

He knew she was wet so he slid the full length of himself deep into her, she arched with throaty moan that had him losing his control and thrusting deep into her with quick jabs of his hips, she rocked back with a wild toss of her head matching him thrust for thrust. She was his perfect mate, the other part of his wild soul. He clamped his teeth down on the soft part between her neck and shoulder, she shuddered violently as her core soaked him. He growled with throaty approval and she answered with a sensual moan.

He ran his hands from her hips to her breasts, squeezing and tugging the nipples in tandem with his frantic thrusting. Her body took everything he offered and turned it into pure carnal pleasure. He shifted enough to bring his knees in under her body so when he thrusted he lifted her off the bed. She arched with cry of unbridled passion her body clenching him hard enough to be painful, but it was sexual pain that caused him to lose himself deep inside of her, she milked him dry as he yelled her name.

Her head dropped forward, her body quivering from the release that wracked her body, the tremors so deep her bones almost hurt from it. He wrapped his arms around her and gently pulled her into him so they could sink back to the softness of the bed. She moaned as her body spasmed from the motion, he slowly rubbed circles on the soft flesh of her belly.

“can people die from pleasure?” she shuddered in his arms.

“i’m not sure…. want to find out?” he placed a soft kiss on her shoulder.

“i don’t think i can do anything else right now..” she murmured softly.

“Sondra..” he whispered her name softly.

“hmm?” she couldn’t open her eyes.

“I love you..” his arms clenched her tenderly.

“i love you too Cole..” she slipped her fingers into his linking them.

 

He felt her slip into the arms of sleep and smiled into her fiery hair, his arms caging her soft body protectively against his. He would never let this woman go, her passion and love brought him to life and he’d never be foolish as to take that for granted again. He inhaled the spicy scent that was all hers and smiled, his mind already thinking about other places he could show her.


	34. Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Final Chapter.
> 
> *****EROTICA*****
> 
> Enjoy!

*****EROTICA*****

 

He found her in their favorite spot of the ruins sitting on the blanket. She grinned up at him as he walked over to sit behind her, his hands pulling her back so she rested in his arms against his chest. He couldn't get his fill of holding her or touching her, he didn't think he ever would.

She snuggled back against him, her hands coming to rest over his around her waist. He could feel her mind whirling as questions began to well up, he settled in and waited because he knew as soon as she started asking she would have a lot of things she wanted answers too.

"Cole?" She toyed with his fingers absently.

"hmmm?" He rested his chin against her hair.

“how many times did I actually interact with the Spirit of Compassion?” she rested her head back against him.

“As few as I could possibly manage..” he squeezed her gently.

“why?” her voice was pure puzzlement.

“I didn’t want to share you… not even with Compassion..” his voice took on a possessive note.

She giggled “You were jealous?”

“Yes I was…” he smiled against her hair.

“Why? I wasn’t interested in anyone but you..” the soft confusion in her voice almost made him groan.

“You might not have been interested but plenty of them lusted after you…” he couldn’t control the growl in his voice.

“well that had to do with what I am.. outside of Iron Bull I didn’t get scary vibes off of anyone else..” she laughed softly.

“Woman.. are you trying to kill me?” he danced his fingers over her stomach making her squeal playfully.

“STOP…” she wiggled and he stopped tickling her.

“What about the night I gave you the dagger?” she settled back into him.

“Oh Compassion got the bath… and I got the rewards..” his grin was pure male arrogance.

“It was the dagger that finally put everything together in my head…” her fingers moved to touch the hilt of the dagger she spoke of.

He frowned in confusion “How is that?”

“I never saw how you put it on that morning before you left for Adamant...But when I would see you here in the Fade you had it on....if you’d pulled the image from my mind you shouldn’t have been wearing it at all..” she tilted her head to smile up at him.

“I never even thought of that.. I love that dagger ..” he kissed the tip of her nose.

“I think I knew something was off.. but I just didn’t want to face it or myself..” she looked sheepish.

“Does it still upset you?” worry laced his voice.

She lifted her gaze to his “No.. I love you too much to let it bother me..”

He smiled at her tenderly every facet of this woman’s personality amazed him and made him love her all the more.

He saw the next question enter her expressive eyes “Why did you tell me no that night.. when I danced..”

He took a moment to reply his voice was husky “Because had I taken what you offered you might have realized what I was hiding… that night your passionate nature brought me too close to the surface..”

She thought about before nodding her head “I understand..”

“Will the other’s be able to tell something's not right?” she’d been worrying about this question for awhile.

“Most people see what they want to see.. for the majority..no.. but there will be a handful that will either know or sense it..” he knew she was scared.

She gnawed her lower lip “I think Fenris will know.. he’s pretty smart..”

“Him yes..his wife certainly.. Varric is another.. and Solas knows..” he nodded at her.

“Solas?” she looked puzzled.

He stared down at her and arched one brow slowly.

She blushed warmly before giggling “Oh yeah.. I forgot..”

He tilted her face back up so he could kiss her, she melted against him.

She pulled slowly “So all the roses?”

He grinned roguishly “I have a certain love for roses now..and white lace..”

She laughed lighting up in his arms like a warm flame “You're a romantic!!!”

“Only for you” he growled softly as nipped her neck playfully.

She kissed his jaw and murmured “I love that about you..”

"so where do we go from here?" She gazed at him trustingly.

"We can finish helping the Inquisition and then maybe we can go build our own lives somewhere...” he ran his fingers over her cheek tenderly.

Her dark eyes melted at his touch " alright... I'd like to find Sophia and Fenris...their my family and now yours as well".

He nodded and stop resisting the temptation calling him to the softness of her mouth, her lips tasted like warm spices to him and he drank her in. She uttered a soft sigh of pleasure at his touch so he took advantage and slipped his tongue into the heated warmth of her mouth.

She twisted in his arms until she was chest to chest with him. His hands settled on the gentle curve of her waist as her arms snaked around his neck. He could feel the heat of passion ignite inside her it was a living creature writhing under her skin the power called to his hunger. The slumbering beasts in both of them started waking up.

She moved her body never breaking their kiss, until she straddled his lap her long dress hiked up to her thighs as her body heated languidly. He felt his groin tighten painfully as she sat in his lap, her mouth hungry and demanding against his. She broke the kiss long enough to look into his eyes, he saw the sensual mischief darken the exquisite brown orbs. 

The dress she was wearing vanished, his eyes darkened the deepest blue she had seen yet, her body clenched painfully at the sheer force of the desire in his eyes. He ran his hands up her ribs to the swells of her breasts, he cupped both as she arched up with a slow roll of her body, he loved her bodies response to him. He was very thankful he was leaning back against a fragment of old wall that was solid and firm.

He teased both nipples as he watched her body respond with a wantonness he had yet to see in the waking world, her back arched up pressing her flesh against his hands. He wanted to enjoy her pleasure any way she desired it, so he teased her with his hands letting her set the tempo and pace.

She slid her hands down his arms to his hands the feel of him touching her like this wrenched her desire up a notch, the heated knot in her belly coiled tighter. She felt the fire dancing in her blood and she gave herself over to the demands of her body. The heated air started to roll around them setting her hair dancing on it like living fire, it mesmerized him to see it.

She looked into his eyes the hunger inside her crystal clear to him, he got rid of everything but his hat, he had to feel the fire of her skin against his. He wanted to feel the heat if her in his soul consuming him from the inside out. She arched sensually as his hands moved to caress her body, from her throat down over her swaying breasts to the seductive curve of her hips. 

The more he touched her the stronger she burned, she felt the dampness between her legs as he worshiped her body with hands and eyes. She moved over him playfully, teasing just letting her wet folds brush against his hardness, enjoying the power of her feminine nature. 

He leaned forward and took one nipple in his mouth, he used his natural gift to make his tongue feel like a piece of ice, she gasped arching up the eroticness of his actions made her even wetter. The smell of her caused him to growl around her breast, he slid one hand down between her legs to tease the slick folds. So he sank two fingers into her willing heat, she grasped his hair pulling him closer as she cried out her body already close to the edge.

He fisted himself and ran the sensitive tip along the core of her body, the hungry moan she uttered almost tore his control apart. He teased her slowly, with slow back and forth strokes, before letting go to grasp her hips. She slid down on him with a shuddering tremor, he sank deep inside her body. 

He moved his mouth to her neck nipping and biting as she rode him, her passions were tangible as she writhed and bounced against him. He wrapped his arms around her and bucked his hips, teeth leaving love marks on her skin as she screamed her passionate release to the Fade, he threw his head back roaring as her hot slick walls convulsed and milked him voraciously.

She melted against him as he pulled her close, both of them panting and weak.

"is it me or can we not go slow anymore?" she panted softly against his neck.

"I can't help it... You make me lose control.." He simply grinned.

“huh.. maybe I should tie you up sometime..” she giggled when he bit her.

“now I know you're trying to kill me…” he licked the spot he’d nipped.

She smirked “well I’m the Spirit of Passion.. better hope you have the stamina to keep up with me..”

“I’m not the one who's passed out several times now…” he growled playfully.

She smacked his arm “Hey it’s not nice to point out a ladies flaws!”.

He laughed against her neck.

She grinned and settled into him with a contented sigh.

He gazed at her and gently brushed a wild curl off her face “you know this probably won't be easy, there will be hurdles and problems along the way.”

“I know, but every hour I get to spend with you is priceless. I’ll handle anything this life throws at us if I know you’ll be there at the end.” she kissed him tenderly.

He hugged her to him until she squeaked, he had no words after her tender declaration. But he knew he’d fight for every moment he got to stand beside her and that was all that mattered to him. Not where they’d end up, but that they ended up there together with each other.


End file.
